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Post by winegirl on Sept 9, 2007 19:33:23 GMT
Well I do know that alot of depression and anxiety is caused be seretonin in the brain being raised or lowered, and most women get the baby blues for a few days after the birth. So my theory, (and I have no medical expertise WHATSOEVER), is that it is all to do with the seretonin being raised or crashing after giving birth. I think this is what causes baby blues ans in women who get PNI it is just because this chemical hasnt balanced back out again.
Probably a cack theory, but would make sense to me
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Post by rachelk on Dec 31, 2007 17:13:15 GMT
This is wierd because with my first son I had literally 4 years of sleep deprivation, but no depression. My second son (4 months) is like an angel. He sleeps, he feeds, he smiles. I feel like he has been here before, he honestly never ever whinges or cries (except when starving). BUT I have quite sever PNI. I have a gorgeous husband, helpful family, long mat leave, easy labour, enough money etc. etc. BUT I still got depression. I have to say that there isn't a factor for me, it is just something that has taken over me like a black cloud. Sometimes I wish there was something I could blame, but there isn't.
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mumz
New Member
Posts: 3
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Post by mumz on Jan 17, 2008 9:50:59 GMT
I feel that several things have contributed to me getting PNI-
I had SPD throughbout my pregnancy and very often couldn't walk, turn over in bed or get up of a chair. I suffered from the illness severly, and then when I had my baby (who was nearly 10lb) he majorly bruised me as I am only small and it took a long time to heal and I felt like I'd been in pain forever!
Also the change in my body was much worse than with my first, I have gone up 2 dress sizes which has knocked my confidence.
Also when I had SPD I didn't go out much coz it hurt so much to walk, so feel distanced from alot of my friends, and am left feeling quite lonely.
But mainly I think it's trying to divide my time between a 5 year old and newborn, and keep the house in order, all of which seem to be getting on top of me, leaving me feeling like I am a bad mother/wife. Also being a housewife is a thankless job, and I often feel undervalued.
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Post by rachelk on Jan 17, 2008 13:53:50 GMT
Mumz, I agree with a lot of what you say. I also have a 4 and a half year old and newborn and feel like it is just one immense struggle to look after them both, get number 1 to school, feed number 2, pick up number 1 from school, clean, cook etc etc... I didn't have PNI with number 1 but did with number 2 and I feel that a lot of that was due to the stress of having 2.
Have you been diagnosed as having PNI? Are you on Anti-depressants? I have been on ads from approx 2 months now and feel that I am starting to make some recovery. It isn't appropriate for when you are really depressed, but I am reading a book I am finding really helpful for now that I am feeling a bit better. It is called 'don't sweat the small stuff - and it's all small stuff' by Richard Carlsson. It teaches you to put things in perspective, to think 'will that spilt drink bother me in a year'? etc etc. Sounds a bit daft but it is slowly helping me feel a bit clamer about the stresses of life.
Take care
Rachel
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carol
Full member
Posts: 117
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Post by carol on Jan 23, 2008 15:09:43 GMT
Hi Ladies, Like RachelK I have no outside factor for my PNI. My first two children were very much wanted (2nd one fertility drugs required). But I wasn't happy in my marriage, and money was very tight, however no PNI at all. I left my husband in 2002 and had a bit of a rough time and then met my new hubby and unexpectly fell pregnant. Unplanned pregnancy and I was 42! No major money worries, fabulous husband, lovely house, good relations with ex and older children very helpful, 16 year old daughter loves to baby sit so why have I now got PNI??? Love Carol
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Post by Scarlet on Jan 23, 2008 16:30:55 GMT
Carol, You sound very much like me (cept for the new hubby ~ I wish ), as an older mum my baby was unexpected as well, after a period of enjoying my life before drawing my old age pension . Was it a huge shock to the system for you, and all the thoughts of having to do it all again at a time when you were starting a life of relaxation with your new hubby perhaps that brought on your PNI.
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Post by cheshire on Mar 26, 2008 17:47:38 GMT
Does anyone think that, in addition to birth problems and hormone changes etc. - that at some level, self esteem issues might be a factor ?
Not that someone needs to lack confidence, but perhaps things come to surface after having a baby?
Hx
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Post by winegirl on Mar 26, 2008 17:54:17 GMT
. Could be the case. My OH seems to think I always had a nerves problem underneath the service, though I have argued till i was blue in the face about it - i would go anywhere anytime and was scared of noone, but he seems to think that it has always been a part of me and PNI has just brought it out.
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Post by rachelk on Mar 26, 2008 18:22:02 GMT
I also see a common link with a lot of people on here who describe themselves as 'perfectionists'. I know that there seemed to be common link in books I have read too - especially the Elaine Hansak one.
I am a perfectionist and I obsess over cleanliness, getting things right, people liking me, people thinking I am doing a good job etc.. I am convinced I was heading for a fall this time around due to shear exhaustion!!!
Rachel x
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Post by Scarlet on Mar 26, 2008 18:32:11 GMT
For me I think it was circumstantial, as I'm quite confident and not really a perfectionist. I only got it with my second as life was easier back then when my first son was born. Too much going on this time what with family issues and having to bedrest during pregnancy becasue of complications, and also being alone a lot during this period, and I am prone to a bit of worrying as well I guess, but not to the extent of the worrying I had with PNI.....
Very interesting though to find out if we share common traits.
xxxxx
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Post by nicola1712 on Mar 29, 2008 20:51:31 GMT
My biggest factors in getting PNI are....
Hormonal - before having LO used to get really bad PMT plus had a couple of bouts of bad depression, and was put on Prozac for it for five years. Had to wean myself off it before getting pregnant and now LO is 9 months old those same feelings have come back but not just for two weeks every month - now all the time.
Not being able to leave LO with anyone else, including her dad, without me crying and stressing that they and she won't be able to cope.
Buying a puppy when LO was just three months old - BIG MISTAKE! Talk about add to the stresses and means there is always someone else to think of, plus DH can't help me with LO when he is home as he has to deal with pup.
nicola 1712
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Post by littlelotty on May 15, 2008 12:47:22 GMT
I would say my biggest factors were:
Hormonal - I would drop rapidly around the time of the month and after pregnancy it was awful and I took my overdose when I was on my period.
Feeling resentful my life had changed - I am not sure if this is a reason but it is one of the biggest things I felt - I was so resentful to hubby that he life hadnt changed at all as he was still able to do everything he did prior to baby but mine had been turned upside down. I also resented my LO as I couldnt do the things I could before.
We had a lot going on - christening, big white wedding, moved house and I think all this stress put too much pressure on us and particulaly me!!!!
I do think there is some link with genetics - my mother has very bad PNI with all three of us and took 3 overdoses and was sectionned when we were children, my older sister only has one child but suffered PNI with her and is still on meds. And I was the next woman to have it. Scary that nearly everyone in our family seems to have suffered PNI!
Well not sure that helps and I am sure there is lots more I could of written but these are the main points.
LittleLotty xx
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Post by tiredofpni on Jun 25, 2008 16:39:18 GMT
I would say it is definitely hormonal for me. I have only ever had it during and after pregnancies and had a similar obsessive worry thing when I was going through puberty and my mum said I got my period and the obsessing etc stopped as quick as it came! Funnily though, I have never suffered around the time of my period until I got pni.
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Post by tiredofpni on Jun 25, 2008 16:42:56 GMT
Ooh, I also had stressful pregnancies and can't give birth naturally which I beat myself up about at times. Relating back to previous posts - I am most definitely a perfectionist and hate that the world isn't perfect.
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Post by sianyc on Sept 4, 2008 16:01:39 GMT
Hormonal mostly I think BUT things definately went down hill after a stressful visit to see G's family in Scotland where I kept given tasks to do when the baby was only 6 weeks old. It was like his sister had priority with her 2 week old baby (who admittedly does have a serious heart condition) and I was left a lot with her older two and my 2 year old and baby.
Also my mother and sister stopped popping in very much and complaining I lived too far away (8 miles and they both drive and have their own cars) to come and help on the one night a week when G was working til midnight - this started me off thinking I was isolated and no-one wanted to spend time with me etc etc
It was all so different to having one child and after a while it sank in that the chaos was permanent, the hard work was permanent and that was it really. All down hill from there.
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