Advice plz

[stevensmummy]

Its me in this section again, I'm plagued by non eating and sleeping children! lol

My eldest, whos just almost 3, wont sleep again. I think I need to do this controlled crying with him. He can be up for hours on end, just playing away. but when i do shut him in his room its crazy screams for hours. I just didnt have the will power to do it.

But this time I have to, I'm almost worn out and hes grumpy and really horrible to his brother, from the lack of sleep i think. I'm thinking, I could put a stair gate on his door and shut it, so e cant get out, as when i close the door he just opens it. It upsets me to see him like that and I end up being really grumpy with my OH and my other little boy.

Can I do this?
Any tips?
Tell me i'm not being cruel?
Does it actually work with a 3yr old?

thanks guys
Sarah xx

[sianyc]

I would have no problem in using the stairgate and know several parents who have done that for this reason and also to stop a child sleepwalking out of the room.

One of my friends had to use one on her lo (now almost 6) and he would go NUTS for about 45 minutes. It took a long time (I think about 2 months) before he finally gave in and realised he would not win! Not all kids are this stubborn though

Do stickers/rewards etc work at all on him. My eldest will usually do anything for a sticker as 10 means a treat like having nail polish on or staying up to watch Dr Who etc.

[AnxiousMum]

Hi StevensMummy,

Not sure if you seen my posting to Em re her LO not sleeping, but I suggested a stairgate on his bedroom door. I did this with my son from about age 2 as he used to climb over his cot and my mind went into overdrive about where he could get to in the middle of the night!

I dont think its cruel and obviously no one likes seeing their child upset, however, sometimes they just need time to come to themselves and calm down - especially if he's taking it out on your other LO. In addition, I think its important that children find ways to entertain themselves.

Maybe try putting him in his room, with stairgate, when he's calm and explain that you have something to do and want him to play with his toys. The reason I say this is that you dont want him to think he's just put in there when he's being naughty.

Everyone is different though and what works for some, doesn't work for others. It certainly worked for me though.

Good luck
Kxx

[stevensmummy]

Cheers guys,

2nights attempt at controlled crying went sort of out the window as he was exhausted and fell asleep after his story! My youngest wasnt sleeping so i said to him, Daddy will stay for a 10min cuddle, like normal, but we'll put off the light and close the door so Stuart goes to sleep, My OH was out after 5mins, he was asleep.

I kept him going all day. i didnt let him nap. Sometimes he has 4hrs, if I leave him to sleep. He was grumpy but hes almost 3 so he surely doesnt need a nap. I baked a cake and got him tidying up and washing his cars and toys, so it wasnt too bad.

See how it goes

xx

[winegirl]

Hi Sarah

Sorry I have seen this after rabbiting on about controlled crying in your diary! Hope the advice makes sense??

WG x