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Post by Anna on Oct 23, 2002 19:52:01 GMT
It seems some days I can stay positive and believe I will beat PPD and other days I feel swallowed by a hole and tell myself that i will be this way for the rest of my life and that there is no way out. Anyone else feel this way?
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Post by EVELYN on Oct 24, 2002 19:45:55 GMT
Yes. I posted recently saying that I felt that I was finally leaving the PND behind- but this past week I've been back to square one! I know what the triggers were, and that one after the other, the blows finally demolished my new found belief that I was getting better. Sure, I've had a run of bad luck lately, but I felt so much better these past 4/5 weeks that I truly believed I wouldn't feel depressed again. But a week ago the cumulative effect of a number of misfortunes was like the flood waters breaking through a damn; I was suddenly overcome by despair, paralysing sadness, that made me feel all but swept away from normal life, and once more alienated and alone! Yesterday was my lowest day for a long time. Stuck in the house with my one and three year old with the rain and sleet battering the windows and trying to hide my continual flow of tears from them- all I wanted to do was sleep, but couldn't. Wishing I had someone to talk to about the immensity of sadness and pain I was feeling, and once more haunted by pressing thoughts of suicide, it was torture. All I can hope is that, with the trend of longer 'good' spells and shorter 'bad' spells, I will soon feel better. Surely this is a vicious, unrelenting, and detestable illness!!!!!  Ev. |
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Post by Ruth on Nov 5, 2002 13:44:45 GMT
Hi Anna, I too have days where I think,'great, this is it, I feel like my old self again' , when 'boom', 'my balloon is burst(so to speak) I think that's the worst thing about this condition, and hard for partners too. I am really doubting myself now, and my already limited self confidence is windling away. Some days I just cannot stop myself from crying at the stupidest things. other days I feel I can tackle the world single handed! I have got an appointment now with a consultant psychiatrist. I feel nervous about that. What if I'm on a good day and he feels I am wasting his time, will I be able to talk to him, I have very deep seated concerns that I am loathe to talk about in case they take me away. I feel so confused at times. Does anyone else feel like this? Ruth |
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Post by Anna on Nov 5, 2002 23:22:03 GMT
Ruth it sounds like you have days where you actually feel normal and then days of the dark PPD. I do not have any up days, all down days. I have been told when the good days start to outnumber the bad you are on the road to recovery. I would tell the doc alot. I see one and trust him completely. He has really helped me. Even if is a good day tell him how you feel on a bad day so he gets the picture of how serious you are. Let us know how it goes. I would love just 5 minutes of the old me. I haven't felt like my old self in 15 long months.
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Post by natalie on Nov 7, 2002 17:49:55 GMT
hi im new 2day ive been suffering from pnd for 5 months now im on anti depressants which aint having any affect so far im seeking counsellinga nd have recently been attending a mother and toddler group i try and say i wont b depressed today but i cant stop it ive no control over it i wish i did
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