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Post by lesley on Feb 13, 2005 9:07:20 GMT
hi everyone here i am again feeling yuk the awlful intrusive thoughts are back. I have two gorgeous daughters aged 8 and 4 who are my world and a loving husband although doesnt understand about pni bless him. I went back on anti depressants 8weeks ago .They seemed to be working but this week the horrendous thoughts and feelings appeared which has knocked me for six. My husband has been skiing for 10 days and normally i would cope with this but not this time.Could this be why i am feeling like this? If theres anyone out there who has suffered as long as me please reply as it would be so nice to hear from you.can anyone put my mind at rest that this will pass and i will survive this relapse.
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Post by Veritee on Feb 13, 2005 12:49:24 GMT
Hi Leslie Its horrible isn’t it when you think you are better and you get a bad day and it all comes flooding back? If you see: veritee.proboards7.com/index.cgi?board=General&action=display&n=1&thread=4163There is something about this here. I found that at times of hormonal disruption, it did appear to come back like it had never been away or got any better - for me ending breastfeeding then an ovarian cyst, then menopause! And it seems so bad even worse than initially because yo know know how it is to be well, so it is doubly disappointing. As to how long you have had PNI - well I was substantially better by the time Caja was three - but I would have not said I was fully well until she was 5 I know absolutely that if I had managed to have the other baby I so wanted and had got PNI with this baby I could have been ill for several more years. I wish it was not so but for women who have it with more than one birth and perhaps when they are not fully recovered from PNI from the last child, some have PNI for a number of years But we all get better in the end. I hope the forum will be of use to you in this (Can I ask?: Did you use it before by the way under another member name??? You do not have to tell me at all but it would help me to see where you are coming from, you do not have to but do you think you could join again as we have had a few problems with postings as guests recently which nearly meant the forum went under! And this would be sad for those who rely on it! So I hope you understand when I say will be asking all new posters that anyone who feels they can and that it is not unsafe for them to provide at least hotmail or other e mail address - hotmail is pretty untraceable and you can have more than one hotmail e mail address and even keep one for your membership of this forum - that they sign up as a member of the forum as this will help us here, but if you feel you can not - then please post without becoming a member) All the best Veritee
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banana
Senior Member
The good days are back!!!
Posts: 361
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Post by banana on Feb 13, 2005 22:41:53 GMT
Hi Lesley,
I havnt been suffering with PNI as long as you have but just wanted to offer my support and say that I am thinking of you.
Lana x
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Post by lesley on Feb 14, 2005 9:23:03 GMT
hi veritee the answer is yes i have used this site before and i will join but dont know how to not very good on a computer.thank you for replying to my message this does help. i spent last night awake for most of the night with weird and very disturbing thoughts going through my mind which scare the life out of me .i know none of these things will happen to me but i am always in fear that they will. i have survived this awlful illness for 4 years and for 90% of the time i am great with not a thought or feeling entering my head and that feeling is great. so it is 10 times worse when it appears again.i know it will pass but some how i am always in fear it wont.i went back on anti ds 8 weeks ago and i thought they were working is this normal for them to take this long?it always seems to come back during or after my period anyone else relate to this . my girls and my husband are my world and i want to be a wife and mummy forever and ever please tell me i will be ok .looking forward to hearing from you soon. ithink i used last time i used this site could have been india b or lesley but it was last feb/march i used it.xxxx
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jennie
Full member
2 bubs,9 and 4,better though still struggle.
Posts: 59
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Post by jennie on Feb 14, 2005 9:50:31 GMT
Lesley, my children are 9 and 4 ,I think sometimes I'm so much better and then something happens and it feels like all the good work was for nothing.
I'm slowly coming back up after a huge drop... I rushed straight back to the gp's cos I was having suicidual thoughts....I was scared they'd become more than thoughts.If he'd phoned an amulance for me I wouldn't have been surprised.....
I'm being refered back for counselling and will stick it out this time even when I pick up(ie.I so the I'm fine so don't need this)
I'm one of the mum's who wasn't fully recovered from pni when I had my second child though it was no way as bad as when I first had it...
The husbund going away when you were all ready vulnerable couldn't have helped....
my gp said to me is it like your fine carrying your sheet of glass with rose petals and marshmallows on and then someone lobs a gret brick on it?Perceptive man my doctor.
I'm having to treat myself like I'm convelesing from a serious illness... Saturday we took the kids to the cinema and out for pizza and when we got home I went for a sleep for 3 hours.... anyway as our situations are so similar maybe we could support each other.Sometimes I feel like what am I doing using a pni forum when my kids are the age they are ,there's about 4 or 5 regular users who have been struggling on and off for a number of years including Wendy one of the moderators.(hope you don't mind me saying that Wendy but it could be useful for Lesley to keep an eye open for your posts)
take it easy, with love jennie
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