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Post by wendabell on Oct 9, 2005 16:20:05 GMT
hi bam, oh i do feel for you with the whole tax credit thing. As you proberbly know i work and my mum looks after my kids for me while i sleep in the day as i work nights.I get the lowest tax credit as i work.But we are border line well just over the minimum joint wage line so we earn too much ( ha ha like to see some of it for some treats)And as mu mum looks after my kids she is not intitaled to any money from the working family tax credits.If i put my kids into childcare i think i would get something though but not much.I too amin the middle if being up to my eyeballs in debt with a lot of zeros after it.And i too am renovating and old watchmakers house and trying to put it in some form and even more spookier is on the 20th i am having a new combi boiler put in and moved to a new location.Its hard work and so frustrating, and some times i wonder if it is at all worth it being in a job and owning your own home as you never get a break in financial help. I can only offer my sympathy to you as i know how you must be feeling. my thoughts are with you wendy x.x.x
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Post by bam02 on Oct 9, 2005 16:22:30 GMT
Hey weird yes our combi boiler is being put in on the 24th!!!!
Must be connected....
A-M
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Post by wendabell on Oct 9, 2005 16:26:35 GMT
we are fitting two bathrooms at the moment and one of them is being moved and relocated and a new room being built.my house is a building site.
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Post by bam02 on Oct 9, 2005 16:32:20 GMT
Our bathroom is a work in progress the tiles not finished grouting. The water tank is in there and will be taken out too. We had a new kitchen last year and the windows done. Some money from my medical retirement paid for it - but its always more than yout think and everywhere needs decorating and new carpets.....
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Post by yoyo on Oct 10, 2005 11:47:41 GMT
I don't envy either of you ! Sounds like you've got lots on!
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Post by bam02 on Oct 11, 2005 9:30:21 GMT
Feeling a bit wobbly today. I am sure its cyclical related to PMS - just a few days before period I start to feel hopeless and lacking in self esteem. My doctor in the past recommended Star flower oil with a high GLA content - but they are so dear! Not sure how useful they were - maybe I should try them again.
But as I am 40 too. I wonder at the perimenopause - it s a new thing I have seen in the lead up to menopause ironic to mention this on a PNI website-but my periods have become a little irregular and never were before. Its all I need an extra physical cause!
I was on my course yesterday as Mental health volunteer and I found talking about things a bit hard. They are just in general. Its not personal -but it can affect you still obviously especially as I don't pretend to be well!
I wish I could have more motivation too to do things around the house. but I just want to avoid things and hope it goes away -but it never does. Its strange how the anxiety invokes action -even if useless action like checking things or over doing things to exhaustion and depression invokes inaction still to exhaustion!
it seems you can't win. I want to enjoy things but I can't really - better sometimes than others-but things still lack colour and pleasure! It annoys my hubby no end that - my lack of gratefulness and enthusiasm.
Well must check my daughter.
Bye for now
A-M
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Post by cheshire on Oct 11, 2005 14:58:02 GMT
Hi AM
Sorry you're feeling a bit wobbly today.
I've never heard of peri menopause, all I know is that if I continue to follow in my mum's footsteps around pregnancy, birth and PNI - then I'll be due to menopause early - I'm guessing peri menopause is the lead up to this?
I agree,something new is the last thing you need..
..glad you went on that course yesterday - will this mean that you'll do some voluntary counselling at the end of it?
I completely agree with the anxiety/ guilt/ overactivity/ exhaustion/ anxiety cycle -something I am trying to break but not doing that well yet..oh well.
Well, I just hope that your day is going OK.
Take care Hopefulx
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Post by bam02 on Oct 13, 2005 7:08:22 GMT
Just copying from Susannes diary to mine what I wrote as I think its significant in my recovery that I backed out of something I wanted to do. I don't think the support is there for the job and i needed that - was frightened of falure as at work too. Don't think they understand why - just some one not being committed.
I went to a meeting last night of the Hurdles committee, a local charity for disabled children as my son has Aspergers syndrome. I had been very involved and wanted to be Treasurer as I was an accounting Technician, but it seemed like too much and I stepped back and told them I was officaliy sick(on incapacity benefit) and the thought of the responsibilty sent me in to panic, so some one else is doing it.
But I feel a spare part as a ordinary committee member !!! I hope to go to next monthly meetings , but as some things clash I think it will look like I am avoiding them!! Well never mind. At least they can't ask me to do too much. But I feel a bit paranoid now they will never trust me.
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Post by bam02 on Oct 14, 2005 21:44:24 GMT
Just watched" The Brief "with Alan Davis,had a story about a young adult with Aspergers syndrome. very close to home!
Bit sad really my son is so literal - at school today he said he had something to tell me. but he stuttered to get the words out.
I without thinking said "spit it out Andrew"!
He said " don't mum I will spit at you!!!" He then did!!!
what can one do? I asked for it!
A-M
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Post by bam02 on Oct 15, 2005 0:02:37 GMT
Now awake at nearly 1.00am! Feeling a bit sick, not sure why had some alcohol but not so much as sometimes. probably mixed with something else. Being awake at this time is not usual and i am worrired will be exhausted tomorow and no sympathy - not that I ever expect it . i am always in the wrong lately.
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Post by cheshire on Oct 15, 2005 0:12:08 GMT
Oh AM
Are you ok?
Sometimes we just can't sleep hey? Horrid isn't it?
And then kids to face tomorrow hey? Oh well, as Susanne would say - sending you good vibes and a hug too Hopefulx
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natalie1985
Senior Member
Mum of Peter ~ Born 15th Dec 2004
Posts: 470
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Post by natalie1985 on Oct 15, 2005 0:44:57 GMT
Hi AM, Are you ok? If you want to talk i'm here Love and Light, Natalie xxx
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Post by cheshire on Oct 17, 2005 9:09:38 GMT
Hi AM
How are things with you today?
Hxxx
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Post by bam02 on Oct 19, 2005 20:52:15 GMT
Today was a bit of a nightmare. Started Ok. Had a course to attend at local therapy centre (type of Mental health day hospital) called Self esteem group and I thought it started at 10.45am - it actually started at 10.30am so i was 15 minutes late!!!Not a good start.
Later i was in Matalan carpark and pulled in a space nudging a brand new car with the driver sat in it!! Causing scratched paint work! So we swopped insurance details! I went into the shop and she was talking about me at the tills and pointed me out to her friend who gave me an aweful look!
I burst into tears and the person who was serving me was worried and was actually very nice to me! As I said I have to get outside of here!!
It didn't help that my debit card was refused and I thought it was because I was upset, so got my pin wrong and used my credit card!
After Matalan I went to Sarah's swimming lessons looking like I had conjunctivitus and a flushed face. so everyone was concerned. I then rebooked her lessons for over christmas and my card was refused again!!!
I ended up at the bank at 3.45pm being told we needed to clear our overdaft and so got my husband out of work early to sort it out!!!
What a day.....Still got red eyes...
I phoned the insurance company to report my potential claim and expected the lady to phone me but she hasn't so maybe there wont be a claim!!!Perhaps my tears affected her!!
What a nervous wreck I am.
A-M
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Post by cheshire on Oct 20, 2005 14:29:09 GMT
Oh AM,
What a bad day for you?! Oh, I just hope today is better for you.
Mild problem compared with your day yesterday but do you know what I did - I went to the cash machine and asked for £50.00 - this is supposed to last me for as long as I can amke it, as I am almost overdrawn as I've not been working for ages...and guess what clever clogs did - only took the card and left the money..aaaggghhh. Needless to say it wasn't there when I returned. Life's a sod sometimes hey?
And just don't ask me how many cars I've written off - please - and that was before PNI!
I guess we wouldn't know what a good day was if we didn't have so many bad ones hey?
Thinking of you. Love Hopefulx
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