|
Post by Scarlet on Dec 14, 2007 17:20:56 GMT
Sounds like she took on board your comment, well done for speaking up...it's prolly what the others were thinking. I know what you mean about the teething, my LO has his back teeth coming through and he's very resless at the moment, I have little sleep and am crabby *smiles*. I think it sounds like a good idea if your LO can go for a few hours into a nursery per week, it will give you a break, and after the initial guilt trip, you'll be fine.. and your LO will love it. Love and hugs Scarlet X
|
|
Bobyn
Senior Member
Posts: 454
|
Post by Bobyn on Dec 14, 2007 19:11:55 GMT
LOL, are any of us saints Smiley?! A day to yourself with the LO in nursery sounds like a really lovely plan. You're not deserting your baby by doing that and you're most definitely not a failure. It sounds like your hubby is being really supportive and you're taking it easy and accepting that you need time for yourself too. My first one went to nursery 2 days a week when I went back to work and loved it. When I stopped working due to the PNI I kept her there for 1 day to give myself time out and give her a different type of day. Have a good weekend and let us know if you hear anything back from work. Bobyn x
|
|
smiley
Senior Member
Posts: 268
|
Post by smiley on Dec 15, 2007 14:25:43 GMT
Oh god what would I do without you guys?! ;D
You make me feel sane when I feel insane most of the time! Yes I am warming to the idea of the nursery plan too! Scarlett your right after the initial guilt trip we will both love it! Motherhood is a rollercoaster of guilt trips!
Had a very up morning today and then something trigger a downer but its wearing off now!
Have a good weekend
Smiley
|
|
smiley
Senior Member
Posts: 268
|
Post by smiley on Dec 16, 2007 10:29:37 GMT
Arghhhhhhh! I hate this illness!
|
|
|
Post by cheshire on Dec 16, 2007 12:00:13 GMT
Hi Smiley,
Sounds like you're having a difficult day? Sending you hugs Hopefulx
|
|
smiley
Senior Member
Posts: 268
|
Post by smiley on Dec 16, 2007 15:22:10 GMT
Thanks hopeful. I was so looking forward to a nice relaxing weekend and a nice exciting warm up to christmas. But some of pni symptoms have shown up this weekend. I have felt tense and unemotional towards my little en. I feel worn down and dreading my week alone with him. Yes I have had a tough week with him teething and this may have added some pressure on me. Sometimes I feel I will just crack and never be fixed again.
I am worried that I will never fully recover from pni even though I can clearly see the improvement - what if I stay like this forever? Up and down and worn out! I am sick of lying to people that I am coping - even hubby thinks I am fully recovered from pni - if only he knew! Also, I am again worrying about getting it again with a second child. I also feel really scared to leave my baby with anyone and impending christmas with outlaws..
Why cant these unhelpful feelings just go and leave me in peace?
Smiley
|
|
smiley
Senior Member
Posts: 268
|
Post by smiley on Dec 16, 2007 15:23:51 GMT
Also I cant seem to focus on the positives and keep slipping into negative thinking and attitude. Why dont I feel like the luckiest girl in the world?
|
|
Bobyn
Senior Member
Posts: 454
|
Post by Bobyn on Dec 16, 2007 20:39:21 GMT
Also I cant seem to focus on the positives and keep slipping into negative thinking and attitude. Why dont I feel like the luckiest girl in the world? Hmmm, I'll put a bet on it being something to do with the PNI? LOL You will get better though Smiley, and even if you do get it with a second (and there's no guarantee that you would) it's not half as bad the second time round - or maybe you're more accepting of it and nicer to yourself. Plus it's easier to be positive on the bad days as you know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I'm only 4 months in this time which scares me if I think about it too much as I suffered for 2 years last time, but my HV keeps reminding me not to compare the two times. And not to compae myself to anyone else with PNI and their time frame either. We'll all get over this in our own time - sooner rather than later would be nice though wouldn't it You're doing so well Smiley, don't let the b******s get you down now you star Sending you lots of hugs. Bobyn x
|
|
|
Post by Scarlet on Dec 17, 2007 8:58:28 GMT
what if I stay like this foreverNope this won't happen because life is forever changing and history shows otherwise. It's a temporary condition hun and you are well on the way to full recovery. Also I cant seem to focus on the positives and keep slipping into negative thinking and attitude. Why dont I feel like the luckiest girl in the world?Sounds like a bit of a blip after a few good days to me, ride it out hun You'll get there Love and hugs Scarlet X
|
|
|
Post by winegirl on Dec 17, 2007 9:03:45 GMT
Hi Smiley
I often sit and think that i am never going to be free from PNI. I think it is made worse when you have had a few good days and then suddenly drop back down again. The blips seem harder somehow.
But you will be free of this hun. We all will, i think it is just a very long and bumpy road. Hope this blip passes soon for you hun so you can relax and enjoy Christmas xx
WG x
|
|
smiley
Senior Member
Posts: 268
|
Post by smiley on Dec 17, 2007 9:25:17 GMT
Thanks guys for encouraging messages. Yes you are right the blips are harder because you think your totally well again when you have afew good days.
Feeling abit more upbeat today - I think I feel more tense on weekends with people around as you have to put more of a face on. Have another session with the therapist tomorrow.
I guess we just have to keep plugging on and cherish the highs and celebrate our progress even if its minimal.
Smiley
xx
|
|
|
Post by winegirl on Dec 17, 2007 14:47:50 GMT
Hope your appointment goes well tomorrow Smiley! Glad you are feling a bit better today hun, hope it keeps pickig up for you x
WG x
|
|
Bobyn
Senior Member
Posts: 454
|
Post by Bobyn on Dec 17, 2007 17:13:25 GMT
Sending you lots of hugs and hope for a few good days Smiley. x
|
|
|
Post by Scarlet on Dec 18, 2007 9:39:15 GMT
Let us know how you get on with the therapist if you have the time hun.
Hugs
Scarlet X
|
|
smiley
Senior Member
Posts: 268
|
Post by smiley on Dec 18, 2007 17:12:46 GMT
Hi guys Had an okayish day today (it could have been worse I suppose). Always abit wobbly after a therapy session as my mind mulls things over. We are starting to put everything we have discussed on paper and starting to make some connections. It makes me feel empowered to think I have recognised my problems and I am dealing with them rather than burying my head in the sand! But I know there is alot of hard work involved too. On the baby front - yes he did catch a cold from the kids in the creche! and now passed it on to me! I have been thinking more and more of this nursery idea and may actually put him in one day a week in the new year. Its tough on my own all week and I sometimes feel at breaking point. Maybe I can regain some of old chilled out self by this arrangement. I am kind of frightened by the seperation thu and I suppose that reflects how needy and dependant I have become. I think about it some more - ooohhh the thinking that goes into things these days!! ;D I suppose it will soften the blow when I do go back to work and make it easier for both of us. ;D Smiley xx
|
|