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Post by Scarlet on Mar 20, 2008 9:43:35 GMT
Sounds like you had a busy day Littlelotty. Great that you are able to get out and about and do some sport, I couldn't manage squash though. Well done to you.
Oooo reflexology, it's great to be pampered isn't it. Do you ever have your hair done there as well? I used to go to college for my hair done at one time, and all the beauty treatments..
My LO has hit the terrible twos I think, he's just turned 18 months as well and is quite a handful like yours.
Have a good day
xxxxx
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Post by katiev on Mar 20, 2008 19:15:06 GMT
Thank you so much for your reply. I'm goignt o talk to my Health Visitor again and my GP, I guess I will find something in the end. Thanks for the offer of help aswell, it made me feel a bit less isolated! My LO is only nine months old, but already I'm noticing that she seems to act up so much more when shes with me. She can be as good as gold for her daddy and then the minute I walk in its tantrum time. I don't know what it is, but I'm sure its not that shes happier when shes not with you. I guess she just communicates her moods with you and needs so much more from you than everyone else, like when we're nice as pie to other people all day and then take everything out on our family or friends, the ones closest to us.. Reflexology sounds ace, I bet it will make you feel amazing. Let me know- seen as Im getting nowhere with counselling maybe I will try a bit of pampering! And yes, well done on the squash, thats pretty hardcore- makes me want to do more exercise! Hope you've had a good day x
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Post by littlelotty on Mar 21, 2008 18:42:38 GMT
I typed my whole day's diary this morning and lost it all - it was soooooooooooooo annoying!! So I gave up and I will have to write more now. Well what a couple of days - up and down!! Yesterday I met up with my friend at 11am and we talked for two hours and it was really nice to catch up as she is very caring and a lovely person. She then said she was going to head off and it left me thinking everything - she has had enough of me, she prob think I am mad, she was bored etc and I felt quite down. I did a bit of shopping for some craft things as I was going to do this next week.
I then went to the college for my reflexology and when i arrived the college was shut due to a power failure which I was really annoyed about as I was really looking forward to this. I headed back home and did some ironing and cleaning and then got my LO from nursery. When I arrived my sister in law's hibby was there picking up his LO and he hasn't spoke to me for 7 months and usually walks right past me so I was anxious but for the first time he talked to me and we have a sort of conversation so I was very shocked! I came back and I took my LO out on her trike with the handle which she loved - I did this to stop her from running riot in the home and stressing me out before hubby came home and it worked so well. My hubby was home before we got back - My LO was so well behaved after this - will have to do that more often!!!
We bathed her and gave her milk and one of my hubby's friend who is a plasterer turned up to prep the downstairs as we had a bad water leak and he is re-plastering the ceiling. It was a right mess when he left as there was PVA glue over the floor!! so I spent half an hour cleaning that and then sent hubby to get a takeaway as by now it was 8.45pm and I did not feel like cooking. I watched a bit of telly but we had to watch this upstairs as all the furniture was moved into the living room and you couldn't see the tele!! Fell asleep but woke up at 5.30am and struggled to get back but I must of and when it was time to wake up I was so tired.
We had to get up and dressed as the plasterer was coming for 9am so a bit of a manic rush. He then arrived late and I was starting to stress as we had to go over to my house as we had someone coming to pick up some gates at 10am but we managed to get there just in time. We then went into town shopping as we had to be out of the house for most of the day. That was nice and our LO was very well behaved. We had lunch in Pizza Hut and it was really nice. We came back about 3pm and oh my god the mess - I have just spent 3 hours cleaning it all up - there was plaster everywhere - all over the cupboards, floor, applicances, etc and it was a nightmare. Me and hubby ended up having an arguement as he was outside stressing about the fence coming down again and I was trying to clean up and I felt he had left me to do it all. He said he didn't know where to start and gets so stressed at the house looking in a mess - it brought back a lot of memories for him before and we then argued about it. We managed to get it all done though with out LO running in the middle of it all!!! We have said that we would never buy a house again that needs so much work. We have to leave the plaster to dry for five days and then I will be painting the ceiling so I will have fun with that!!!
At least the whole of the downstairs looks very clean now which is good and my hubby has just bathed our LO and I had better get her some milk. We have to get the washing machine out tonight as we have someone coming tommorrow morning to collect it so I imagine that will stress us out!
I have said that we need to talk about this at relate and although it is not a big problem it is the past that is then making it worse as my hubby thinks I am going to leave again but I am trying to reassure him that I do not want to go and these things will stress us out and it is normal but because of what we have been through the last year it makes it very hard to see this.
Hope everyone is well.
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Post by katiev on Mar 21, 2008 20:09:34 GMT
Oh, Im sorry that youve had such a difficult/busy/emotional few days. And that was a disappointment about the reflexology- will you get to do it another time? I guess everythings so up in the air with the house and all the work that needs to be done, (sounds like a nightmare- I get stressed out when theres so much washing up to do, let alone plastering!) and would put strain on even the most stable of relationships! I hope that you manage to get it all done as easily as is possible and that life gets calmer soon! katiev x
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Post by winegirl on Mar 22, 2008 9:09:18 GMT
Hi Hun
Sorry about missing out on the reflexology! It is the only real alternative therapy that I swear by! Will you be going again next week?
I hope the rest of your weekend is alot less stressful for you and you get some time to chill out a bit x
Take Care
WG x
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Post by littlelotty on Mar 22, 2008 9:14:32 GMT
I was so tired after all the cleaning, we then got the washing machine out which caused another nightmare as water went all over the floor that I had just washed and I was not happy and really snapped at my OH. He can't do anything right poor man! We then cooked dinner as I think he could see I was stressed and tired. Watched tele and fell asleep watching it. My hubby woke me and got me upstairs, I had a bad nightmare and jumped in my sleep so much that it woke up my hubby at 5.30am and he said he has never see anything like me jump like that, we talked for a bit as I was shaken up and then it took me a while to get back to sleep but like yesterday I must of but then it was time to wake up and I was so tired but I got up to get my LO. I said to my hubby what I would give for a lie in these days!
We have the man coming to get the washing machine at 10.30 and then we are going around my in laws to watch football on tele as my OH team are playing!! It should be nice though to get out.
I was really arguementative yesterday and knew I was but couldn't stop myself - not sure if it was because I was tired or PMT or what but hopefully the diary will help me to see if there is a pattern.
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Post by winegirl on Mar 22, 2008 9:18:54 GMT
Hi Litlelotty
Know what you mean about the lie in! I am resorting tonight to going to bed same time as my LO to try and catch up on sone sleep!
If your snapiness does turn out to be PMT perhaps you could stock up on some Evening Primrose to help ease things for you at that time of the month? Are you due on soon?
Lots of ladies find that PNI makes PMT symptoms tons worse and really do see a monthly pattern.
Hope you enjoy yourself out of the house today and get a bit of chill out time x
Take Care
WG x
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Post by littlelotty on Mar 24, 2008 11:21:53 GMT
Well yesterday was a mixed day. My hubby got up first and gave our LO breakfast and I was able to sleep for another hour and we then got ready and went to my house to pack some more things and disconnect the washing machine. Luckily our LO slept whilst we were doing this. We then went for lunch and our LO was funny - she does love her food!
We dropped her around my in laws as we were going back to my house to load more things up including a washing machine in mine and hubby's cars! We managed to do this and somehow I managed to get the washing machine in my car - we must be strong!! We unloaded it all back at hubby's place and unpacked everything. My hubby then got ready as all of his family were having a get together for easter at his parents but I was not invited so this was hard but rather than thinking about it all the time I tried to accept that it was too soon and I cleaned the house and then went to bingo which I have been trying to do for weeks so was really pleased I managed it.
It gave me the chance to do something I like - I haven't been for 8 months and it meant my hubby didn't need to feel so guilty about me sitting on my own in the house. Shame though as I didn't win although I was soooooo close at times and it got me very excited! My hubby came back when I came home and our LO stayed the night at his parents so we could have some time together. We talked for a bit and then I feel asleep - all that moving and cleaning must of worn me out! Hubby set the alarm for 6am as the semi-final tickets for wembley went on sell and although he has one we are trying to get two more for me to go so we tried for an hour and when we got through at 7am all 4000 of them had been sold in an hour so very annoying but there are some more tickets on sale on thursday so last chance to get them - I don't like my chances but at least my hubby has a ticket.
We are having a bit of a lazy day today - we both managed to fall back to sleep just after 7am and woke up at 9.30am which is a really good lie in these days and my hubby went and got our LO from his parents whilst I got ready. She has come back had a run around and has now gone to sleep so peace! I think we are going to tesco's this afternoon so I am sure that will be busy.
Hope everyone is ok.
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Post by winegirl on Mar 24, 2008 20:18:36 GMT
Hi Littleotty
Glad you had a nice time at Bingo! I am determined I am going to go one of these days, sounds like a right laugh!
Hope the rest of your afternoon went well? Best of luck for getting the tikets on Thursday! Do you want me to try and log on to get one for you at the same time?
WG x
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Post by littlelotty on Mar 24, 2008 22:50:17 GMT
Hi WG
Thanks for your offer for loging on - wish I could do that would be a lot easier. It is only through phone - ticketmaster and it is sooooooooooooooooooooooooo frustrating as it is either engaged or when you get through a recorded message says there is no available operaters and cuts you off so I will grin and bear it and hope I get them if not it will have to be me and my LO in front of the tele!!
I have my counselling tommorrow - my first individual one and also relate so a double hit!! I am getting anxious about my counselling but I am sure it will be fine as I want this all of my mind and to forget and get over some of my past.
I have been so tired today - does anyone else notice they are more tired on the meds or with this illness I guess? Never been so tired!
Take care everyone and hope you all had a great long weekend
LittleLotty xx
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Post by cheshire on Mar 25, 2008 23:11:34 GMT
Hi Littlelotty
I'm sorry if I have asked this elsewhere (don't think I have, but sorry if s0) - how did your counselling go today? You must be worn out as I was with counselling + meds etc.
Keep in touch, Hopefulxx
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Post by littlelotty on Mar 26, 2008 12:17:00 GMT
I had a bad day yesterday as people probably saw on the other thread. I woke up like it and could not brush it off! I woke up sooooooooooo tired and cannot believe how tired I am at the moment - I could sleep forever. I sat watching tele and on the computer yesterday morning and did a couple of loads of washing. I then felt quilty by lunch time that I had done nothing and phoned my hubby upset that I cannot cope any longer and I think he was worried and didn't know what to say and then I felt like I wasn't getting what I wanted back from him.
I had a mad moment and sanded down the wall with the plaster to then paint it and managed to do this and then had to clean up as it was everywhere! I then felt I hadn't done a good job and phoned hubby again and said I can't do this anymore and to phone a painter and get them to do it as can't cope. He said that I was to sit down and not do anymore and that he never asks me to do anything but I put too much pressure on myself. I then cleaned the house in order to feel better I guess and did some ironing. I didn't get dressed and showered until 3.30pm! I then went for my counselling and was anxious as I didn't know where it was and a new area but managed to find it. The session was just to go through everything and see if that was the right place to go and they will then allocate me a counsellor. It was ok to tell my life story I guess but I didn't go into great detail just said all the main major points that have happened. They think I will not have to wait for long - couple of weeks which I was really pleased about as I know I want to start dealing with the past.
I then came back and my hubby had got everything ready with my LO and we then took her around in laws - I got angry as again I couldn't go into the house because of my sister in law and me and hubby nearly had another arguement. He said that I was really down again and have been all day and was asking what is the matter - he was really worried I was going to leave again. I said I don't know what it is - I just knew I felt down. I said that it is probably PMT as I am sure I am due on - I forgot to write down when my last one was but think it was 3-4 weeks ago so should be around now. I am going to get some evening primose like you said WG and hope that will help.
We went to relate and had dinner beforehand. Our session was as always very good and I seemed to talk the most which makes a change. It is interesting that although we both think we talk to each after an arguement or something we don't argree on we actually don't get to the bottom. I was able to realise that on friday when the plaster was done and it was a mess when we came back my hubby couldn't cope and wanted me to take control and tell him what to do and we were able to link that back to his childhood and they way his mum has been. Now I know that it will be easier and I can then do this. Also I was able to say how much I get upset when his mother always critises everything and never says anything positive. We were able to talk through this and the counsellor was able to help me realise where his mum has that issue and how to accept and deal with this. We then talked all the way home and at home about ground rules again and what to do if we were in the same position again so it is really helping us. We then went to bed and I slept as ever very well although I am dreaming so much. The relate counsellor said to start writing the dreams down in my diary as she thinks this will help. Can't remember what last night's was so couldn't of been that bad.
I then woke up late this morning and had to rush to the doctors appointment. They have signed me off for another 4 weeks and given me some more tablets. I brought some more stuff back from my house and will be so glad when I have moved it all!
I am going to sit down for a bit as the relate counsellor talked through this that I am pushing myself too much and need to take some more rest and then do a bit but to keep resting in between!
Hope everyone is ok.
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Post by winegirl on Mar 26, 2008 12:51:25 GMT
Hi Littleotty
The relate counsellor sounds ever so good hun. I am even considering doing this for Hubby and I. We never resolve issues (prob down to me just trying to brush everything under the carpet) so could be beneficial.
You do need to rest more. You cant do everything! I get days where i say i cant cope anymore too, and i think it is good that you can relate it to PMT.
As you are signed of for another 4 weeks the most of it and relax hun. I was signed off for 6 weeks in total when i was first put on the meds and regret wearing myself out cleaning and ironing and organising etc..
I hope today is a better day for you babes xx
WG x
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Post by littlelotty on Mar 26, 2008 13:25:10 GMT
I just have to add that I just phoned up the local college to re-arrange the reflexology that I missed last week and they have booked me in for tommorrow and they are giving it to me for free as it was there fault that I missed it last week so I was really happy at that!!!!
I have been signed off for 6 weeks now and another four will take it to 10 weeks so I do feel guilty for being off work but I am just starting to realise that I need to slow down and rest and not feel so guilty for everything. I have cheered myself up being on this website for the past hour - it helps me to help others and I feel better after.
Relate has been the best thing we ever did WG and wished we had done it before - we do have a fantastic counsellor but it goes so fast - I never want it to stop! It has made us closer as we are starting to understand what the other one is thinking and feeling. It is amazing that although we talk we never talk to the core of the problem like we do in relate!
Hope you are having a good day WG.
Take Care
LittleLotty xx
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Post by winegirl on Mar 26, 2008 15:42:04 GMT
Hi LittleLotty
Oooh best of luck with the Reflexology - it is ACE!! The only reason I dont go anymore is because of money, otherwise i thik i would have it every day! Fab that you got it for free!
Thanks for the input on relate, will prob talk to my OH about it tonight.
Right massive toddler tantrums on my hands here so better shoot ..
Take Care
WG x
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