mah
New Member
Posts: 16
|
Post by mah on Mar 10, 2009 23:29:47 GMT
I can't believe my son is a year old today, my daughter is 3 next week and I am probably in the worst shape i've ever been. I have suffered from PNI since my daughter was a baby and am really suffering at the moment. I've decided that from this day forward i need to work really hard at beating it once and for all before it affects, not only me but, my marriage and my babies. I am starting this diary to keep a record of how i'm feeling and things the progress (hopefully). I've also asked a good friend to help me out by being there to talk to and help to clarify my thoughts, i appreciate any help i can get and really want to feel better for my kids and OH.
|
|
mah
New Member
Posts: 16
|
Post by mah on Mar 11, 2009 0:23:33 GMT
Today has been a bad day for me. It started well with wishing my little fella happy birthday and having breakfast. Soon went downhill with rushing round to try and get to Katies swimming lesson. Had an altercation with my mum about looking after Xavier so got to swimming late and very stressed. Had a great lesson and treated the kids to a McDonalds for lunch before dropping Katie off at school. For some reason when I came home at lunch I felt really dazed and unmotivated. Had so much to get done but couldn't bring myself to do anything, got very tearful and the anxiety kicked in. Tried so hard to perk myself up for kids in the afternoon but Katie's wingeing soone set me off. OH got home and we managed to have an argument, that was it then, I sank so low i didn't want to carry on. I am hating this depression, really don't know the best thing to do.
It all started a few weeks ago, i'd been on fluoxetine for a few months and had been doing well, things were going great between OH & I then i started feeling hazy, a kind of cloudy feeling which i didn't like and didn't seem to be able to get rid of. I saw docs and he suggested the meds had plateau'd so doubled the dose. This made it worse, more cloudy and struggling to sleep so saw the doc again, he changed the meds from fluoxetine to tardcaps - i gave up breastfeeding to go onto these and thought i'd taken the right step. Trouble is, i was soon feeling awful, felt totally exhausted (to the point of falling asleep standing up), constantly thirsty and quite low so saw doc again. Then it went wrong, i've now been off the tablets for 6 days and feel awful!!! The anxiety is back in full flow, i'm snapping at the kids and have had thoughts that i really don't think i'm cut out for this. Not sure where to go now..........
|
|
|
Post by sianyc on Mar 11, 2009 8:27:55 GMT
A lot of ladies here have had problems in finding the right meds to suit them. It's worth going back to the GP to let them know that the side effects on the newer ones were unbearable and that you feel you should have a different one again.
There are loads of different meds he can prescribe to you. Just be as honest as you can re the anxiety as well as the depression as they each do slightly different things (as far as I can gather!)
I've found escitalopram/citalopram good for anxiety and had very few side effects. They also disappeared after a few weeks so it wasn't a struggle to adjust to them.
I know it's off putting going back to the GP. I told myself it was either that or continue wading through my day. The right treatment means that you'll recover quicker and feel better about the time with the kids x
|
|
|
Post by winegirl on Mar 11, 2009 20:33:50 GMT
Once the meds are out of your system (not sure about the meds you are on and how long the half life is) you can move on to trying another med. I was on fluoxetine and it drove me mad (though many swear by it!) and then moved onto escitalopram which was my life saver.
Dont give up hope. Even without meds this thing is beaten and I promise it is great the other side of PNI and you will get there xxx
WG x
|
|
mah
New Member
Posts: 16
|
Post by mah on Mar 11, 2009 21:12:34 GMT
Well, today has been a good day, which is fantastic given its the first one in at least 2 weeks ) It started off well, although the kids were up early i let them mil around upstairs while i showered, dressed and put some makeup on (for the first time in ages) and did my hair. I got them washed and dressed and we were downstairs eating breakfast by 8am!!! I know it doesn't sound much but its a HUGE achievment for me. I have had a busy day, i help run a toddler group on a wednesday morning so did that before driving up north to see family - its been a good day although i'm tired I've felt good and positive which is fantastic, lets hope it lasts for a bit x
|
|
mah
New Member
Posts: 16
|
Post by mah on Mar 11, 2009 21:15:42 GMT
Oh, meant to say that it was under doctors advice that i stopped taking the tablets. He's asked me to go back on monday for a review - i do think that i'm going to end up on some other tablets as the past few days have been really hard to handle. Its reassuring to know that its possible to find one that really suits
I have a lot of issues that are surrounding this PNI and was hoping to start writing them down however, now i'm on a good day i can't think of what to write but am glad that this tool is here for me to pour into on days i need it
|
|
|
Post by winegirl on Mar 11, 2009 22:10:53 GMT
To get yourself showered and made up and your kids washed and downstairs all before 8 am is more than an achievement hun!! It would be a bloody miracle in my house! We have to leave at 7.30 for me to get to work and I am generally impressed if I have managed to brush my hair!
Glad you had a good one today babes, hope tomorrow is good for you too x
WG xx
|
|
|
Post by sianyc on Mar 12, 2009 9:03:16 GMT
NEVER would happen in my house lol - usually running round 5 minutes after I should have left looking for hair bobbles for the girls and trying to find my shoes at the same time.
Makeup - what's that?
|
|