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Post by chica on Oct 3, 2009 7:41:23 GMT
Huge congratulations!!!!! Just to reassure you, I had horrendous stomach cramps at the beginning of my pregnancy, bearing in mind, the possibility that I was pregnant never occured to me, as I had been told that I couldnt have children, and was actually on a waiting list for a hysterectomy, so what I thought was a build up to a huge and heavy period, and I just wanted it over and done with, it wasnt actually that at all, but I was preggars with twins ;D Take it easy if you can, and get lots of rest!! Easier said than done I know. Much love Chica xxxxx
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Post by winegirl on Oct 3, 2009 9:55:00 GMT
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!
That's fantastic news!!
I was another who had cramps and spotting in the very early stages of pregnancy, and I had had fertility treatment previously for PCOS so was TERRIFIED. But was assured it is quite normal and to chill the hell out! LOL
You now have all the tools in place should you need them for any reccuring PP symptoms, and so should now focus on enjoying it!!
So pleased for you hun, HUGE hugs to you and your little bean xxx
Love
WG x
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Post by cheshire on Oct 3, 2009 10:21:14 GMT
BWP - Just to add that yes, I too had the cramping and spotting with my first ..... so much so, I thought it was a light period! I only discovered I was pregnant at 3 months when I realised I had lost my waist and couldn't get into my wedding dress
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Post by nicola1712 on Oct 3, 2009 17:57:53 GMT
I beat myself up for ages about being on meds while pregnant but in the end we decided it was best all round for mine and everyone else's health and sanity! The only issue I will have is that they will keep me in a few days once he is born to monitor his withdrawal symptoms - but am just hoping that cos am on a low dosage he will be ok.
I didn't feel sick till 6 weeks with either of mine - had started to think I was imagining it and then woah, sick sick sick! This one I was actually violently sick on 6 week date and lay in bed after thinking oh crap, I can't even stop it and this is what I wanted so quit moaning!!
Hope you are getting enough rest anyways and sleeping whenever LO does is a good idea.
xxx
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Post by Bookwormprincess on Oct 3, 2009 20:20:26 GMT
Thanks everyone for all your support and congratulations.
Glad that others have had the cramps too. They seem to get better one day and then back to needing paracetamol the next. Chica you've scared me mentioning twins! Arggh, I could never cope with that, but they don't run in either of our families so chances are slim.
Yes, I've been told I would have to stay in hospital a few days to check baby for withdrawel but I'm on a relatively low dose too I think - what meds are you on? I'm on Dosulipin 75mg.
I had a pretty scary thought moment last night while trying to get to sleep - I just kind of panicked and thought I would not cope with two LOs and that I wouldn't be able to bond with a new one and I even had the thought I don't want this baby, which is so far from the truth! I guess that was an after effect of PNI there, one of the dreaded irrational thoughts. I wish I could be as excited as I was for my son, but I guess PP will always be at the back of my mind now so it kind of takes away some of the joy. But I am looking forward to having a bump and my son knowing that there is a "Bubba" inside - I hope he's old enough to comprehend. He'll be 2 1/2 when baby is born.
It was lovely to tell our parents today, they were really excited. Although it has scuppered my parents plans for a holiday in June next year! Oh well another grandchild is better than any holiday.
Yes, I am sleeping when LO sleeps on the days I'm not working. He's been poorly so his naps are long at the moment which is bliss for me, although it's taking ages for him to get to sleep tonight, Daddy is with him now and I've just come down from being with him for an hour. Seriously going to have to rethink how we get him to sleep if there is going to be another baby to look after.
Thanks again everyone.
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Post by nicola1712 on Oct 4, 2009 19:44:43 GMT
I had a pretty scary thought moment last night while trying to get to sleep - I just kind of panicked and thought I would not cope with two LOs and that I wouldn't be able to bond with a new one and I even had the thought I don't want this baby, which is so far from the truth!
I have had these thoughts too, more or less all the way through - apparently most 2nd time mums worry they won't love the second one as much as the first but 'you just do' - will let you know in a few days! As for the coping with two well that occurs to me every day but you kinda realise you will manage and people go on to have more (crazy people that is!) Most of my friends have said that the second one is easier cos you are less panicky and know more what to do. Plus the baby doesn't do a lot to start with so gives you time to get used to two...and reassure number 1 you are still there.
But I am looking forward to having a bump and my son knowing that there is a "Bubba" inside - I hope he's old enough to comprehend. He'll be 2 1/2 when baby is born.
My LO is 2 and a half next month - she doesn't really understand there is a realy baby in my tummy but she knows something is going on. I ask her where the baby is and she lifts my top up and kisses my tum but that's about as much as she does really. She has seen stuff arriving in the nursery for the baby and we have talked lots about babies, got books with babies in for her to look at and seen lots of friends with babies to get her used to seeing me holding them. We have also bought a baby doll for her to have from the baby so she can join in with me feeding a bathing - will let you know how that goes cos some people don't think that is a good idea. The hardest thing for her at the moment is that I can't do as much with her as I used to and sit around a lot (and cry occasionally) so I will be glad to get back to being a bit more able. She has become more clingy the past week or so - keeps hugging me and crying when I leave the room so I think she senses something is happening so in that sense I want him here so she can start to get used to him for real.
Sorry....I have gone on a bit and hope I haven't bombarded you too much - you have plenty of time to adjust for you and LO so don't worry - just enjoy knowing you have a little secret and make the most of the attention and fuss when you do tell all!
xx
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Post by Bookwormprincess on Oct 5, 2009 13:40:59 GMT
Nicola, I am so glad that you have had those thoughts too so I'm not the only one. My hubbie said he wasn't surprised I'd thought them and he understands which is great.
That's cute that Hannah kisses your bump, bless her. I think the baby doll is a great idea (who's said it isn't?). Ellis already has one and likes kissing and rocking it occasionally, although at other times he throws it around! Never would have thought of buying him a doll since he's a boy but my Mum gave it to him and he loves "Bubby".
Well, I had a little meltdown yesterday and a cry because I just became overwhelmed with the thought of another baby, of giving birth again and being totally scared PP would return. Blubbed it all to my husband who was great, and seems really confident that things will be so much better even if I do get ill. He said nothing can be a bad as what we went through last time when we rushed to A&E, with me screaming and no-one knowing what was wrong with me at first. Even still, I can't get rid of the anxiety which is constanty in my stomach at the moment - anxiety about the cramps I'm still having and then about PP returning. I need to calm down - I'm only 4 weeks gone for goodness sakes, and have 8 more months to go. My nerves won't stand it if I keep up this anxiety.
I'll try and enjoy the secret, but I will feel better when everyone knows and we're past the vunerable first 12-14 weeks. So glad I can talk to you all on here! Hope you don't get bored of me going on about it.
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Post by nicola1712 on Oct 5, 2009 19:03:08 GMT
It gets easier I promise - and nope we won't get sick of hearing about it - everyone has been very patient with me for the past nine months on here!
I found the first three months the hardest and the last three - the middle bit went quite quickly and it is always better once you can feel baby moving cos it is reassuring.
Your hormones will be playing havoc with your feelings too and it is good that hubby is sympathetic and understanding (mine is too, to a degree - as in after nine months of it he is a bit worn out from the hormonal crying episodes!) and he will be able to look out for you too - mine saw the symptoms coming back before I did which was good.
Some book I read said that baby dolls weren't great for toddlers with new siblings cos they drag the doll around by its arms and legs and obviously we don't want them doing that with thier sibling. Bit far fetched for me cos we wouldn't actually leave a two year old alone with a newborn anyway!
xxx
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Post by Bookwormprincess on Oct 5, 2009 19:23:41 GMT
Ha ha, that's a funny reason not to give a toddler a baby doll with a new sibling. Like you say, as if we'd leave them alone together - although, come to think of it, what about nipping to the loo when you're on your own? Uh, oh, baby will have to come everywhere!
Yeah, I can't wait to feel baby move. It was about 16 weeks with Ellis. I read the other day that baby starts moving from as early as 7 weeks pregnant, but you obviously can't feel it then. Did you feel baby no. 2 earlier this time round? I've read that in your 2nd pregnancy you feel baby earlier because you recognise the movements and don't mistake it for wind, lol!
Went to the doctors this afternoon to tell them I am pregnant but silly receptionist had made my appointment with the male doctor, who is nice, but I do not want to see. I wanted to talk to the lady doctor who is also a family friend, because I want to talk about how I am feeling too, so now I have to wait till Wednesday to ring and make an appointment for Friday. Grrr! Had been nervous about it all day and now I have to wait even longer, although in a way, I will feel better saying I am a week late and have had a positive pregnacy test. At least it sounds more certain and real that way.
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Post by winegirl on Oct 5, 2009 19:58:27 GMT
I have also heard that you feel movement earlier in subsequent pregnancies - how exciting! I loved those first feelings of movement - so special x
I hope the appt goes well on friday. Yes, it prob is a better time for an appt a week late. Roll on those midwife appointments!!
WG xx
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Post by Bookwormprincess on Oct 5, 2009 20:11:17 GMT
Thanks WG, yeah wil be good to start seeing a midwife. Hope to have the same one as last time as she will know what I was like postnatally, although must say she didn't actually know what was going on but none of the midwifery team did. You'd have thought they'd have been a bit more educated about PND and PP wouldn't you?
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Post by winegirl on Oct 6, 2009 19:39:35 GMT
Yeah it always amazes me the lack of education on PP and PNI out there... Can you ask to have the same midwife on medical grounds??
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Post by Bookwormprincess on Oct 7, 2009 14:11:35 GMT
Well I am hoping to ask for that reason, my GP told me to ask for her again whenever I got pregnant again, so I may well mention that my GP wants me to have the same one. Trouble is I am nervous about asking as the midwives at the unit can be a bit funny/off from what I remember of last time, depending on who you get. Some of them are downright scary! I wonder if my GP would ring them for me ..... Last time I had to ring myself, so maybe not. I am going to email Dr Ian Jones on Friday and tell him the good news, since he did say to let him know whenever it happened so he could write a letter about my mental health history. Bit nervous about so many people knowing this early on in case something bad happens to the baby, but I am getting more confident in the pregnacy as the days go by since I still have no bleeding and the cramps are getting less. I am pretty annoyed with my pregnancy book that I have just dug out again. I loved it last time because it has weekly development pages about the baby and the pregnant body which hubbie and I read religiously every week. However, now after what I have been through and how common PNI is, I think they should have dedicated a bigger section of their post-natal section to PNI and mention all the types you can get, not just PND. If I had at least heard of PP it may not have been as traumatic as it was. They cover all sorts of physcial problems so why not mental. You know, I may even write to the editor and tell him what I think? It's not as if they are avoiding the issue because they don't want to put women off having a baby - you should see some of the physcial problems they list, it is enough to scare any woman. What do you think, should I write? Is it worth it?
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Emma
Email Support Volunteer
PP for 7 months after my daughter was born. She is now 4 & being her Mum is my full time passion.
Posts: 159
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Post by Emma on Oct 7, 2009 17:54:20 GMT
So thrilled to hear of your pregnancy and wish you health and happiness throughout. You have managed to go that one step further than us - we are both so much wanting another baby (Sophie is now three) and then the next moment are both terrified of me being pregnant and suffering PP again. For now the pendulum continues to swing! Please, please contact the editor regarding PP. It wasn't until almost a year and half after my illness and subsequent recovery that I even knew that what I had suffered was PP. I searched the net determined to find a "label" for what I had endured - and I did! Information should be in the literature given out to and by midwives and HV's and also in EVERY pregnancy book. If we'd read about it we would have known and been triggered to go back to the book or the leaflet and checked it out. Instead we were left to endure such an horrendous and terrifying experience, not helped by the fact I was never actually diagnosed and therefore given all the wrong meds, etc for seven months. Perhaps that is one way to get the message out there - between us write to EVERY editor of EVERY book!?!? Just a thought How did you get a referral to Dr. Ian Jones? I have spoken to Naomi and am going to take part in her research - just wondering what is the best way to arrange an appointment. I'd like to think speaking to him would take some of the fear away for us both. Much love and every possible best wish, Emma x
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Post by Bookwormprincess on Oct 7, 2009 19:20:31 GMT
Thanks so much for your congratulations Emma.
I do know how you feel about the pendulum of fear about PP returning. While we were trying, and before when making the decision to try, I was quite "together" about it, but on Sunday, after a week of positive pregnancy tests, I really did breakdown and cry my eyes out because I became so scared it would happen again. It kind of just hit me I guess! To be honest, even if we'd waited another year or so, I still think I'd be just as scared. Scared of PP and scared of giving birth since that was the trauma that triggered it in the first place.
I have calmed down a bit now and the anxiety in my stomach is lessening, but I'm sure I'll get it back again before the next 8 months are up. But I do know, that even if it happens again, I will be ok in the end and it will be worth it. The love for my son now is amazing, but I do hope and pray I don't have to go through a year of hell to get that with the new baby.
Gosh, how awful that you were not diagnosed for so long and had to trawl the net yourself to understand what was wrong with you. I was so grateful afterwards to have had a doctor calm my family's fears and tell them that I had PP and would recover.
Ok, I will write. You are right that it really should be publicised more, with HVs and Midwives, as well as pregnancy books. Not even all the books on PND mention PP either!
When I feel able and up to confronting it I will compose a letter and post it on here before sending to see if anyone has anything they would like to add.
As for the appointment with Dr Ian Jones, what happened was, I signed up for the APP research at Cardiff Uni through their website by sending an email to the contact address on the page, and it was Dr Jones who replied. I'd mentioned in my inital email that I was interested in hearing about any precautions we could take to prevent PP returning as we wanted to try for another baby in the future. In his reply, he offered to see me at his Cardiff office if I lived nearby, and since we were travelling to South Wales a few weeks later for a holiday, I jumped at the chance. I am also good friends with his parents who were leaders at my local church when I was growing up, but I don't think that is why he offered me an appointment - he genuinely wants to help people. I had to get a referral from my current mental health team so that it was all through the books so to speak, but they were happy to do this, since it was the Cardiff NHS trust that would foot the bill! So there you go, that is how it came about? Perhaps if you email the research team at Cardiff and ask if it would be possible to have a consultation at the same time as taking part in the program, they would be happy to see you. I probably shouldn't give you Dr Jones's email address, but the APP contact details are: app@Cardiff.ac.uk
Just to warn you though, that Dr Jones did give me a higher risk of reoccurance at 50% than my care team who still say between 20-40%. So, it helped to talk to him a lot, but didn't make me any clearer about what the actual risk is, although to be honest know one can really know for sure anyway, and it depends on which expert you speak to.
Take care and let me know if you do get an appointment. How far from Cardiff are you?
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