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Post by monica on May 10, 2016 11:42:04 GMT
How are you today? X
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Post by Kirsty on May 10, 2016 20:45:46 GMT
Not a good day Monica, actually the worst day! I actually had a thought of ending it all today! So fed up and heartbroken with all this uncertainty and upset! Just had enough! X
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Post by monica on May 10, 2016 23:45:43 GMT
Oh no / sounds like a dreadful time. Biggest hugs to you, it's horrible feeling this way. Is it the thoughts of not loving Sophia that are getting you the most. I can honestly say this is the illness talking and not you. Where they just thoughts. Blips are just horrible especially and doubly so after a good spell .
Sorry I can't remember but what meds and dose are you on? If this blip goes on it might be worth seeing g dr for advice and perhaps tweaking meds. I started on 10 mg of citalopram which worked for couple of months then seemed to stop. My dr put up dose to 20 mg then I found out later that 10 mg was a v lose dose and often didn't work. Could be the same ? X
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Post by Kirsty on May 11, 2016 12:38:04 GMT
I'm on 20mg of fluoxetine yeah I was thinking of asking them to up my dose maybe! This blip seems to be going on for a while! It's been horrid! Yeah I feel I don't love her and I don't want her and blame her for all of this and it's killing me I also hey intrusive thoughts of harm to her which is very hard too! X
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Post by monica on May 11, 2016 17:43:36 GMT
I don't know much about fluoxetine and what sort of dose 20mg is. It might be worth talking to dr. I'm sure the cbt will be good at working through these thoughts. Honestly they are common in PNI and not really how you feel . The harming thoughts are like the mothering instinct going into overdrive where you see danger everywhere. Even from yourself at times. Hang on in there - there will be good times round the corner x
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Post by monica on May 20, 2016 13:15:17 GMT
Hi
I was just wondering how the past few weeks have been for you? Hope all is well and you've come out of your blip.
Monica
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Post by Kirsty on May 20, 2016 19:55:37 GMT
Hi Monica,
It's not been too bad thank you! Getting there hopefully! How are you doing? Xxx
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Post by monica on May 21, 2016 10:27:53 GMT
Good news that you're feeling better. Remember blips are a normal part of recovery process although horrible when you're in the midst of it.
I'm working this weekend - boo hoo! But all is well x
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Post by Kirsty on May 21, 2016 17:50:19 GMT
Urgh that's not fun! I hope it goes well for you ☺️ Glad all is well! Xx
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Post by monica on Jun 6, 2016 14:58:58 GMT
How are you doing? Hope things are going well x
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Post by Kirsty on Jun 8, 2016 19:41:31 GMT
The dreaded blip time is here! I had about 20 good days and yesterday and today has been back to hell! I don't know how I'm going to kick this Monica and how I'm going to get through the CBT for my intrusive thoughts. It's all so bloody hard I just want to enjoy my daughter everyday all day and not feel like this anymore! It's my birthday tomorrow and I just want to sleep through it in all honestly! I have cancelled my birthday meal with friends and family. I just can't face it! Enough about me - urgh!! How are you? Xx
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Post by monica on Jun 9, 2016 7:00:17 GMT
Hugs - blips are horrible - doubly so after such an extended good spell. It does feel as if you're back to the start.
However, please try not to despair. This is NORMAL for PNI and part of the recovery process. In time these blips will lessen and become less intense - I promise.
What has triggered this one ? Pmt? Do nice things for yourself, get some exercise in and rest . Try any techniques especially relaxation ones / it will pass x
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Post by monica on Jun 9, 2016 7:01:12 GMT
HAPPY BIRYHDAY my lovely - enjoy your special day xxx
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Post by monica on Jun 9, 2016 7:02:20 GMT
I'm ok thanks - bit up and down. I feel better when the weather is good for sure x
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Post by Kirsty on Jun 9, 2016 11:50:52 GMT
Thank you Monica! I'm trying to get through it! Nice weather is good! Hope you're feeling better today. Yeah think it's pmt etc! Just hate these thoughts they make me feel evil and that I do not deserve anything nice xxx
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