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Post by Gardengirl on Jul 13, 2016 0:07:55 GMT
Hi there.
Ive been diagnosed with pni with my second son when he was 6 weeks old. I was getting a lot of physical symptoms.
It started one day just going for a stroll with my two children. And all of a sudden felt like i was going to pass out. Went straight back home where i was getting dizzy spells, nausea and feeling like there was something terribly wrong with me. I had numb face and arm that was tingly..and hot patches on my face too, bad headaches and feeling very heavy headded and foggy. This carried on for days and my first visit to the doctors said it was a virus. After another week of no improvement and crying my eves out every day believing i was going to die. I went to the doctors again crying, convinced i had a tumor or that i was suffering from a stroke. I had a blood tests and a heart scan which were normal and my doctor did visual tests for a brain tumor, poking my toung out and walking in a line etc. She reassured me that everything appeared normal and she believed i had pnd. Which was so strange to me.. as I completely love my life, my hubby and my two children.. and i wouldnt have been feeling so terrible if i didnt have all these symptoms..
Anyway i decided to trust her and go on antidepressants. Its been 4 weeks on and feeling so much better. Im not crying everyday and most of the physical symptoms i had are gone. Although i still worry everytime i get a headache (which are really frequent) and my bach sholders and neck are really sore. I keep thinking still that it might be something else. And im constantly battling with my head.. telling myself not to worry its pni.. but then thinking.. but what if??. its driving me crazy!! I just want to fèel like my old self again. I feel so guilty that i cant be the mother i want to be to my children. Or give my beautiful husband any energy. Im also so tired all the time.. how long will it take to feel better? Every little ache still makes me question my health.. Are the headaches going to freak me out forever? So tired of this mess that i am at the moment..
Kat xxx
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Post by monica on Jul 13, 2016 17:54:20 GMT
Hello Kat and welcome
Your post is exactly like mine was many years ago. Like you PNI for me started with strange physical symptoms which none could explain . I too suffered from foggiheadedness, headaches, tingling, numbness. Going out would feel as if my vision were distorted , I would feel very sick and weak. That's just to name but a few of the symptoms . My anxiety started to spiral out of control the longer things went on. It's hard to believe hormones can bring on these symptoms but they can.
I'm not medically qualified at all so can't give you a firm diagnosis but it does sound like you've been checked out thoroughly . If it were something serious it would have been noticed.
It's great you are feeling so much better. Even though you're n meds it can take a while to recover with ups and downs. I found my physical symptoms )and emotional ones) worsened when I had pmt , felt physically ill or sometimes for no obvious reason. This is normal although can be pretty horrible especially after a good spell. Try to focus on the overall trajectory of the illness to keep focus on how you're doing overall . It can be hard at times though.
Please keep talking - you will get better x
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Post by Gardengirl on Jul 14, 2016 23:29:27 GMT
Wow ive just been reading others posts and i can relate so much. Im ao grateful to have found this site. Im having a really bad day. Right not my vision is strange. Likt ive looked at the sun and looked away again, but all the time. Got a tight chest and a lump in my throat. I have to keep convincing myself that its pni and im not dying. I so badly just want to feel better
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Post by monica on Jul 15, 2016 10:48:29 GMT
It's horrible isn't it. I found that like you most of my symptoms went quite quickly after starting meds but would return . Triggers can be pmt (even if you didn't have it before), tiredness, illness. It can feel as you're back to square one. But believe me this is the nature of recovery and in time it'll get less intense. How's today going? X
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Post by Gardengirl on Jul 16, 2016 2:21:52 GMT
Thanks Monica for your replies. Im doing better today. Saw my Dr again yesterday and she increased the dose of escitalopram from 20mg to 30mg and she believes that will help with the fear. Possibly will increase to 40mg in another week.. is this a high dose? Im breastfeeding so it scares me a bit. But i dont see an alternative because i need to function with my 4 yer old as well as my 11 week old baby. Its strange that looking back a few weeks ago i was so terrified and absolutely convinced that i had a brain tumor. And now looking at the overall recovery, as you say, im so much better. Im so happy that i decided to go on the antidepressants. Hope i wont have to be on them too long. How long is the usual time to be on them for?
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Post by monica on Jul 16, 2016 15:29:11 GMT
Hi
I'm not medically qualified but pretty sure 40mg is not high - speak to your dr or pharmacist about this. Re how long to take meds for , my dr advised to take them for a year after feeling better - for most meds manufacturers recommend at least 6 months then you have come off them slowly by reducing the dose.
I know exactly the feeling of am I really suffering from something more sinister. I don't know exactly how hormonal changes can affect you physically but they can. The foggy headed feeling seemed to go and return with me (at the time I put this down to eye issues but I now think it was the sensation of feeling spaced out with more sensitive eyes or itchy sore. ) I found exercise hugely beneficial for this symptom as well as for the anxiety and depression. I did exercise classes like spin and aerobics and remember once going into a class really depressed and coming out feeling fine. Exercise raises endorphins so that helps how you feel.
Glad you're feeling better today - perhaps keep a diary - there's a diary section here if u like- to monitor how you're doing. You might spit triggers and be able to offload x
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Post by Gardengirl on Jul 19, 2016 0:35:21 GMT
Yes i may look at keeping a diary. I felt good agsin yesterday but today im spaced out and have a lot of black floaters in my vision snd my stomach hurts.ive been on the antidepressants for 5 weeks now. Should i still be feeling this way? I feel like if i am feeling 'normal-ish' i have to be so careful not to think about anything too much cause i might start feeling bad again. When my husband is home and i have a mid day sleep i feel better, and just in general when he can help.look after the kids i feel better. I feel like im so delicate at the moment and i want to just cry my eyes out because i am STILL going in circles thinkibg it may be something wlse cause surley i couldn't still be feeling this way after 5 weeks on meds. So distressed right now
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Post by Gardengirl on Jul 19, 2016 5:59:35 GMT
slept through the morning untill 12pm. Got up ate and had a shower. Felt better for maybe an hour and now im feeling depressed and heavy headded. Also have a mild headache. Has the increased dose of antidepressants made thisngs feel bad again? They made me feel horrible when i took them initially for the first 2 or 3 weeks.. then i was feeling a bit better.. since theyve been increased i havent felt much better. I just want to be able to enjoy the sunshine. Being outside with my babies. And my life. Im so sick of this
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Post by Kirsty on Jul 19, 2016 7:53:38 GMT
I know how your feeling, I'm sick of this too. I'm 4 months in too! The increase in meds could be why your feeling worse but it will be temporary. I found this when I increased my meds. It will get better, there have been thousands of women who have beaten this and we will too.
Keep talking xx
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Post by Gardengirl on Jul 19, 2016 9:44:14 GMT
Thanks kirsty87 for sharing. I cant believe that this is such a common illness and i had no idea about it. I dont think there is nearly enough information out there about it. Especially the physical effects of the anxiety and depression. I continually google symptoms to convince myself that it is pni. I feel like im going in circles everyday.. like i havent still fully accepted it. Yet im so similar to so many other posts on here. How are things for you 4 months in? Are you having less bad days?
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Post by monica on Jul 19, 2016 20:35:25 GMT
You really have come so far . Five weeks is actually a short space of time (don't mean to sound disheartening ) - having blips is very common although after a good spell it can knock you for six. There will be good days around the corner.
You are so right about there not being any info on physical symptoms - many Drs don't even know this!
Has ur dr offered you talking therapies . Very quickly you can get into a pattern of negative thought patterns like panicking over any symptom (I was obsessed with this) . Something like cognitive behavioural therapy can be very effective in helping you combat this and other anxiety inducing thought patterns . Would you consider this? X
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Post by Kirsty on Jul 19, 2016 21:50:55 GMT
I have less bad days yes and the blips are not as bad and do not last as long but like Monica says they knock me for six! You feel as if this is you forever and I really have to listen to people when I feel this way. Here is my lifeline especially when I feel so so bad. Honestly keep talking it does help! Xx
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Post by Gardengirl on Jul 20, 2016 0:39:15 GMT
Thanks for that.. yes Monica i have a really good dr that has made me follow up with her on a weekly basis and she has put a mental health care plan in place for me. Ill ask the psychologist- when i see them about the CBT.. im trying to take this illness one day at a time - but at the same time its so hard not to want to speed up/ rush the recovery. Today feels like its going to be a good day. Woke up feeling a bit more 'normal-ish' than yesterday. Im trying to register myself on this site, but my email dosent seem to work - i dont get the code?
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Post by katharine87 on Jul 20, 2016 1:03:57 GMT
Great i got the code and im now a member!
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Post by Kirsty on Jul 20, 2016 8:15:59 GMT
So glad you have a good doctor! Time!!! It's the most infuriating part.........recovery takes time!! I just want this to be over like you! I have so much going on in my life right now and I can't cope with it all like I used too I don't think! Argh!! Anyway enough about me! How are you today? Xx
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