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Post by Jan on Jan 24, 2004 22:45:00 GMT
My baby is 9 months old and I am starting to feel like I have no life of my own anymore. I am happily married and this is our first child. my husband is the best i could hope for and he fantastic with our daughter so why do I feel so sad one minute and happy the next. Its confusing me and my husband. I havent gone back to work as my husband has a stressful job so we thought it would be better for me to stay at home and look after the baby, the home and my husband which I have been loving but every now and then I get so fed up and start to feel like I run around after everyone else and no-one does anything for me. I start crying at the most stupid things and can't give my husband a reason why I am even crying. I snap at him for no reason and want to have an argument when we never argued before I had our daughter? What is happening to me? I feel so low and my husband feels helpless. any advice?
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Post by Sharon on Jan 25, 2004 11:32:42 GMT
I'm sorry you're feeling so low. Irritability and tearfulness can be signs of depression, so maybe you could speak to your Health Visitor or GP. My HV came round to counsel me when I was ill and it really helped.
Do you get much contact with other adults? When I had my first, I didn't realise that babies could go to toddler groups(!) When I had my second, I found out where/when all the local ones were and found I could go to one most week days. It really helped to just get out of the house,drink a cuppa that somebody else had made.
I also think it is important to make time for yourself. Can your husband play with the baby for an hour or so while you have a long bath with lots of bubbles and candles? I also find that exercising helps my mood, so I put the kids in the creche at the leisure centre while I do a class, and then have a shower in peace!
Hope you feel better soon, look after yourself, you are important too. Let me know how you get on.
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Post by Hannah on Jan 27, 2004 10:37:48 GMT
I am reading this for the first time. I am reluctant to admit that I think I am suffering from PND. My experience started 3 days before i was due when i was admitted to hospital with high blood pressure. I was planning a home birth which did not happen due to being induced. I had a very quick labour (2 1/2 hours), no pain relief or stitches. The hospital was filthy - I had to clean the loo before I could use it! Iwanted to leave but was told that due to my blood pressure being high I would have a heart attack or stroke. Iwas sent home with beta blockers and then it all began! I now suffer from panic attacks, severe head pains, dizziness, anxiety induced high blood pressure, exhaustion and have convinced myself I am going to die! I am on my own a lot as my partner works away. The doctors are fed up with me and have prescribed citalopram which I have not taken as I don't want tablets. My baby is very good, sleeps all night but during the day is quite taxing. I find it impossible to relax and sleep is a precious thing! I am getting to the point where I might take the tablets but I am so fed up of feeling like this. I often wish I could be back to my energetic, sporty and confident self that I was before having my baby. I now have a major fear of being on my own and drag my poor baby around everywhere so that I am with people (whether I know them or not). It feels like no one understands although they try hard so I am desperate for anyone who can help me. Hannah  |
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Post by Sharon on Jan 27, 2004 13:08:06 GMT
Believe me, I do understand how you're feeling. You will get back to your old self. Please try the tablets, they can take a little while to kick in, so the longer you wait, the longer you will feel ill. There is no need to be ashamed of taking them, if you'd broken your leg, you would accept treatment ( I hope!), and this illness is not your fault. I'm not saying tablets are the whole answer but they can help. Is there anybody who can look after your baby while you exercise ( even a 20 minute run)? Please don't struggle on with these feelings, help is available. Maybe a health food shop could advise you on natural remedies if you really don't want to take tablets.
Hope things start looking up , thinking of you, Sharon
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Post by Claire on Jan 28, 2004 15:39:40 GMT
Hannah
i have been there, i remember exactley. everything is magnified and at times i could feel ferociously angry towards my partner who was always supportive, i could cry at absolutely nothing at all and couldn't even predict when or where i would get upset. you think "i have so many reasons not to be depressed" but you are.
i too was prescrbied citalopram - but for reasons of stigma, my own pre-conceptions of anti-depressants (like oyu, i didn'tlike the idea of taking them) and the fear of being labelled an "official nutter" (!!) i was very reluctant. However all i can say isplease please give them a try - they were a huge turning point for me. You have to stick with them as for the first week i found it hard to sleep, and of course your first reaction is "stop taking them now" but really, don't, you also can feel sick for the first week, but you must stick with it, after 2 and a half weeks there was a definite gradual but strong lift out of the depression, and slowly but surely, fragments of the old "me" returned. i never thought i would ever see that person again! I had never taken anything like anti-depressants before so it was all new to me. But please, you deserve to feel better - have a go!
Claire.
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H123
New Member
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Post by H123 on Jan 30, 2004 7:43:49 GMT
Thanks for all your support.
I have had a really good couple of days. Just knowing I am not on my own and that other people have had similar experiences really helps. However, I am waiting for the next bad day to come and the thought fills me with dread.
Everytime I have a sympton (headaches etc) I can now rationalise my thoughts a little and tell myself it is PND, not some fatal disease.
Keep chatting , it is a lifeline for me at the moment.
Forever grateful
Hannah
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Post by Sharon on Jan 30, 2004 22:40:23 GMT
Happy to help. I go on here most days (at home with 2 year old), so you keep talking too. I'll be here. Glad you've had a couple of good days, there will be more  |
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Post by Dana on Jan 30, 2004 22:49:56 GMT
Dear Hannah,
Take the pills!!!! They will help you. Like all the others, I, too, resisted taking them and battled on for a months until things became totally unmanageble. But taking them definitely signalled a sharp turning point. If you're worried about coming off them - don't. I just did it and it was fine. Good luck! You're not alone.
Dana
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