Post by Mandy on Jan 25, 2004 14:11:21 GMT
I would just like to share my story for some advice and support from women who understand what it's like.
I've just recently had my second daughter (7weeks old) she's beautiful and likes to look around and smile.
My first daughter is now 13 months old. My first pregnancy was fairly straight forward except at 37 weeks i got taken into hospital for high blood pressure 140/90, normally it's around 130/75. Anyway i'd had a really stressful week and my hormones were playing me up. Anyway i got to the hospital and they took it straight away and it was 120/70 they kept me in that night for monitoring and blood tests, the next morning it was still down and let me out. They even arranged for a midwife to come out everyday to take it which seemed a little drastic at the time. She came everyday
for the next 4 days and it was low, then i had my appointment at the clinic and i was feeling anxious about it cause i didnt want to get sent back in, i went to the clinic and it was something really high 150/107 and they rushed me to the hospital and when i got there it was low again, they sent the midwife out again for the next few days and it was low. Anyway it happened again the following week. I couldnt wait to have her by my 40th week. I went into labour 5 days after my due date. It was a pretty uneventful labour, no complications at all (talking about all this makes me feel scared ) She was born on the 9th December 2002 weighing 7lbs 11ozs. She was very hungry after she emerged and i decided to breastfeed. Didnt recieve a lot of help from anyone, didnt really like any of the midwifes. They found Strep B with a swap after labour so i had to stay in for my daughter to have 48 hours of antibiotics, which i didnt mind. I think i slept for a whole 10 hours for the 5 days i was in hospital. They had to inject her foot every 12 hours, which usually fell at 3am just after i got her to sleep. I had to keep running around the hospital to remind them she needed antibiotics. Anyway the day i was promised i could go home my blood pressure went up on that morning and i ended up getting so stressed i thought i was going to explode, anyway that night i discharged myself, they werent very happy and kept telling me what was going to happen if i went home with High Blood Pressure. Anyway the whole time was a nightmare. I was never scared of blood pressure checks before, i'd had loads before my first daughter. After i got out of hospital i developed a full blown Phobia of them. I'd make myself physically sick for months at each Bp check. Then about 6 weeks after my daughter i fell into such a depression that i just couldnt function. Then after about 6 weeks of total panic attacks, palpitations and hallucinating i decided to take on a full time job. Then i started a job in April 2003 but i wanted the job to take my mind off depression, i was a complete emotional wreck, i looked forward to nothing, i couldnt concentrate on anything, i was incoheret. I couldnt be bothered to look after myself, i'd lost 2 stone when i was pregnant and another stone after her. Not to bad because i was nearly 16 stone at the start of my pregnancy. In the April i was about 12and a half. So it was 3 and a half stone i'd lost in a year. I only ate apples and grapes. Everytime i went for a Bp check after her it would be 140/90 so they put me on Bp tabs in the March and in the April i passed out with a Bp of 100/50, they took me off them and said i should never have been on them. By the June i realised i was pregnant again, which actually made me feel better about myself. I'd stopped all the panic by June, but still feeling washed out and slightly depressed. Anyway i was determined that anxiety and Bp wouldnt spoil my pregnancy. I was 18 weeks at my first antinatal check in June. I settled down then until i gave birth on the 3rd December 2003. She weighed 7lbs10ozs and i had her quickly on the ward, i felt really impressed because the first time i was strapped to the bed in main delievery. Everything was much easier the second time round. The problems came after i left the hospital this time. About 4 days after i had her i was really terrible and the midwife who i hated payed me a visit and by the time she left i was crying. She been horrible, she took my Bp (and everytime she'd taken it on my first daughter i got sent to hospital by her) it was a little high. The first thing she asked me was how my BP was when she walked through my door. I told her fine and i had my baby on the ward, and she was amazed and told me that the midwifes must not of been the experienced ones, cause they should have put on the Main Delivery Ward. I felt like hitting her by this point, i was impressed with myself and felt very proud to have had such a natural birth, it hadnt been high for months and months so Why was she being so cruel. Anyway i threw her out nicely, i actually held back my punch as i could'nt deal with anyone pressing charges at the moment.
I probably havent worded it all right, i havent got time to read it all back (babies to sort out)
I find it hard to write feelings down into understandable text.
I'm feeling really really low at the moment. I'm going all panicky again. I've phoned my health visitor and all i get is Leave me a message. I've left loads and no response yet. I hate this feeling of depression and total panic i just cant wait to feel like i used to. Once and for all. No more kids for me EVER.
Thing is i always feel like i would never of had a problem if they would have left me alone through my pregnancy. I feel sadness when i think of pregnancy and it's such a shame.
Mandy
Marina 09/12/2002
Melody 03/12/2003
I've just recently had my second daughter (7weeks old) she's beautiful and likes to look around and smile.
My first daughter is now 13 months old. My first pregnancy was fairly straight forward except at 37 weeks i got taken into hospital for high blood pressure 140/90, normally it's around 130/75. Anyway i'd had a really stressful week and my hormones were playing me up. Anyway i got to the hospital and they took it straight away and it was 120/70 they kept me in that night for monitoring and blood tests, the next morning it was still down and let me out. They even arranged for a midwife to come out everyday to take it which seemed a little drastic at the time. She came everyday
for the next 4 days and it was low, then i had my appointment at the clinic and i was feeling anxious about it cause i didnt want to get sent back in, i went to the clinic and it was something really high 150/107 and they rushed me to the hospital and when i got there it was low again, they sent the midwife out again for the next few days and it was low. Anyway it happened again the following week. I couldnt wait to have her by my 40th week. I went into labour 5 days after my due date. It was a pretty uneventful labour, no complications at all (talking about all this makes me feel scared ) She was born on the 9th December 2002 weighing 7lbs 11ozs. She was very hungry after she emerged and i decided to breastfeed. Didnt recieve a lot of help from anyone, didnt really like any of the midwifes. They found Strep B with a swap after labour so i had to stay in for my daughter to have 48 hours of antibiotics, which i didnt mind. I think i slept for a whole 10 hours for the 5 days i was in hospital. They had to inject her foot every 12 hours, which usually fell at 3am just after i got her to sleep. I had to keep running around the hospital to remind them she needed antibiotics. Anyway the day i was promised i could go home my blood pressure went up on that morning and i ended up getting so stressed i thought i was going to explode, anyway that night i discharged myself, they werent very happy and kept telling me what was going to happen if i went home with High Blood Pressure. Anyway the whole time was a nightmare. I was never scared of blood pressure checks before, i'd had loads before my first daughter. After i got out of hospital i developed a full blown Phobia of them. I'd make myself physically sick for months at each Bp check. Then about 6 weeks after my daughter i fell into such a depression that i just couldnt function. Then after about 6 weeks of total panic attacks, palpitations and hallucinating i decided to take on a full time job. Then i started a job in April 2003 but i wanted the job to take my mind off depression, i was a complete emotional wreck, i looked forward to nothing, i couldnt concentrate on anything, i was incoheret. I couldnt be bothered to look after myself, i'd lost 2 stone when i was pregnant and another stone after her. Not to bad because i was nearly 16 stone at the start of my pregnancy. In the April i was about 12and a half. So it was 3 and a half stone i'd lost in a year. I only ate apples and grapes. Everytime i went for a Bp check after her it would be 140/90 so they put me on Bp tabs in the March and in the April i passed out with a Bp of 100/50, they took me off them and said i should never have been on them. By the June i realised i was pregnant again, which actually made me feel better about myself. I'd stopped all the panic by June, but still feeling washed out and slightly depressed. Anyway i was determined that anxiety and Bp wouldnt spoil my pregnancy. I was 18 weeks at my first antinatal check in June. I settled down then until i gave birth on the 3rd December 2003. She weighed 7lbs10ozs and i had her quickly on the ward, i felt really impressed because the first time i was strapped to the bed in main delievery. Everything was much easier the second time round. The problems came after i left the hospital this time. About 4 days after i had her i was really terrible and the midwife who i hated payed me a visit and by the time she left i was crying. She been horrible, she took my Bp (and everytime she'd taken it on my first daughter i got sent to hospital by her) it was a little high. The first thing she asked me was how my BP was when she walked through my door. I told her fine and i had my baby on the ward, and she was amazed and told me that the midwifes must not of been the experienced ones, cause they should have put on the Main Delivery Ward. I felt like hitting her by this point, i was impressed with myself and felt very proud to have had such a natural birth, it hadnt been high for months and months so Why was she being so cruel. Anyway i threw her out nicely, i actually held back my punch as i could'nt deal with anyone pressing charges at the moment.
I probably havent worded it all right, i havent got time to read it all back (babies to sort out)
I find it hard to write feelings down into understandable text.
I'm feeling really really low at the moment. I'm going all panicky again. I've phoned my health visitor and all i get is Leave me a message. I've left loads and no response yet. I hate this feeling of depression and total panic i just cant wait to feel like i used to. Once and for all. No more kids for me EVER.
Thing is i always feel like i would never of had a problem if they would have left me alone through my pregnancy. I feel sadness when i think of pregnancy and it's such a shame.
Mandy
Marina 09/12/2002
Melody 03/12/2003
