|
Post by sarajay28 on May 8, 2014 20:40:05 GMT
Oh and quite jealous of you having a Buddhist centre nearby for retreat! How lovely. Don't beat yourself up about having to leave early, frustrating I know though. Xx
Sent from my C6603 using Tapatalk
|
|
|
Post by monica on May 11, 2014 22:16:19 GMT
Hi how had ur weekend been?x
|
|
|
Post by quantumrose on May 12, 2014 13:20:31 GMT
Hey all, how are you? I've just been to a PND group at my local childrens centre. It was awful. I won't dwell on it because whats the point? But I went in feeling ok and came out feeling terrible. There was far too much emphasis on social services, when they take children away etc. It's totally freaked me out. And now I feel trapped into going because they "follow you up" if you don't continue with the course. My children are safe, loved and cared for. They are what I live for and now I have another layer of anxiety on top of everything else! The other ladies there have trouble with their relationships and the whole group became about that. It's good that everyone had a place to talk about their worries about their partners but thats one thing in my life that I feel blessed with (that and the children). So I didn't say anything almost the entire time. Bah. It's made me feel like a criminal on day release! How can I get out of this? If I say I'm not coming again, will they just leave me alone?! It was my choice to go, so I guess I can NOT go too.
|
|
|
Post by monica on May 12, 2014 13:55:38 GMT
Deep breaths!
Why don't you tell the organisers how u feel - that you found listening to others problems anxiety provoking and decided it wasn't for you. Maybe one to one approach would be better ? Everyone is different with differing needs so there's nothing wrong with you not attending in my opinionx
|
|
|
Post by sarajay28 on May 12, 2014 14:21:32 GMT
Oh wow what a horrible experience for you, I agree with Monica in telling the organisers how you feel. Not every kind of approach works for all and it really shouldn't make you feel that way. Xx
Sent from my C6603 using Tapatalk
|
|
|
Post by quantumrose on May 12, 2014 16:35:18 GMT
I hope you dont think Im being un-caring or thoughtless about the other ladies needs or feelings. It seemed that they will get alot out of the group. But things trigger my anxiety at the moment, I cant seems to get out of listening mode (in real life!) and I use it as an excuse not to deal with my own problems. Which is not nice for anyone. Not only that its a'lovely' way of my anxiety to keep finding reasons to feel this way. All a muddle but I hope you understand. I think youre right though, I will explain to the organisers (who are kind) that its not for me. Its just that turning down help, in any form, seems crazy! But I think its the right thing to do.
|
|
|
Post by sarajay28 on May 12, 2014 16:59:07 GMT
Of course you aren't Un-caring or thoughtless and yes I'm sure the other do get what they need out of it but you have to think about your own needs too. Xx
Sent from my C6603 using Tapatalk
|
|
|
Post by RaspberryBeret on May 12, 2014 21:31:32 GMT
That's so disappointing for you that the group was not right. I was really fortunate to be on a course for women with pni called craft attack. For two hours every Friday for ten weeks we all did a different craft each session. We made bunting, door names, clocks and more. There was a crèche for the children. Lunch was provided and there was compulsory chocolate eating!! It was amazing.
|
|
|
Post by Weeble on May 12, 2014 21:38:09 GMT
Totally understandable
Sent from my C6903 using proboards
|
|
|
Post by quantumrose on May 13, 2014 6:44:20 GMT
Berry, now THATS the sort of thing I need!! I may use it as a template for a group I set up myself. Im increasingly thinking it may be the only way! Xx
|
|
|
Post by Weeble on May 13, 2014 21:20:55 GMT
I went to a great group run by home start. But I would love a group like you describe too.
Sent from my C6903 using proboards
|
|
|
Post by quantumrose on May 16, 2014 8:42:41 GMT
Happy friday! So, every morning I wake up convinced Im dieing from some awful disease and it takes the whole day to talk myself out of it. Wow, that feels good to admit that! Im scared, sad and exhausted by it. I feel whacked into a corner by this feeling, its my boss. And I want, with every fiber of my being, to not feel like this. Ive been through the reasons why my anxiety might choose this as a focus. The constantly, paranoia inducing monitoring throughout my pregnancy. Breaking my ankle whilst pregnancy and spending a long time in hospital. Falling out with my mum badly whilst pregnant and the suicide of my husbands grandad shortly after lo was born. Thats alot, right? That is alot to contend with whilst in an already vulnerable state. But enough now. Ive had enough, I need to somehow feel safe. How can I feel safe again?
|
|
|
Post by Weeble on May 16, 2014 9:45:01 GMT
Oh hun that's.such a list. I used to. Struggle massively with feeling safe. I identified my safe place. In my case my bed. When I didn't feel safe I went there to feel better.
Sent from my C6903 using proboards
|
|
|
Post by kmum on May 16, 2014 19:51:06 GMT
I remember well that for months I was convinced I was dying! Or at least is been misdiagnosed! Surely the aches and pains, dizziness and constant shakiness wasn't just me!!! But I know realise that it really was!
Last week my CBT counsellor asked me to describe how is been feeling when I said is been constantly anxious. Clenched jaw and like jittery vibration through my body that you can't see but I can feel! He said that basically this was exactly right! That my body was in constant fight or flight mode and that actually, my body will have been vibrating but not visibly to naked eye! He said this is where the exhaustion comes in!
So don't think your nuts to think you are ill as we all know EXACTLY how you feel! It still shocks me how the mind can do this to you. Such a lack of control it then makes you feel like you will never gain control again!!
I'm hoping once I beat it first time il have confidence in ability to turn it around! That's not been the case just yet!
Chin up and stay in touch.
K
|
|
|
Post by quantumrose on May 20, 2014 18:04:35 GMT
Thankyou lovelies x kmum, its reassuring to hear I'm not the only one! I really hope that the way I'm feeling is a sign if recovery and not just a change in the symptoms for no good end. I keep noticing myself worrying about being terrible physically ill, for no definable reason. But I can't then rationalize the feelings and stop feeling it. It's depressing and exhausting. Keep coming round to needing safe feeling/space. Weeble, I hope I find one like you suggested....
|
|