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Post by Kirsty on Apr 6, 2016 8:38:13 GMT
Hello all, this is only my 2nd post! I have had a few good days but the anxiety is always there and it's driving me mad! I have been taking my meds for 8 days now and need to know that I will feel better when they kick in?! I also have my first counselling session on Friday and I have Cbt assessment on the 20th April! I have also bought anxiety for dummies book and have started reading it! I'm really really hoping that all of this is going to help me! I hate waking up everyday not knowing how I'm going to feel and feeling anxious all the time!
My little one is 2 n 1/2 weeks old now and I feel I fail her everyday because of this! I was having a great day the other day and my husband and I went to the cinema to have some us time (I feel I'm failing him as his wife too) and left my baby with my mum! I lasted an hour before I left having a major panic arrack and had to get home!?!? What is wrong with me!!!!!!!!!! I hate this!
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Post by monica on Apr 6, 2016 15:18:13 GMT
Hi
It can take several weeks for meds to kick in which is very frustrating I know. I think it was about 2-3 weeks for me then slowly things started to lift . Stick with it - what ur experiencing is normal . I'm sure once the cbt starts as well things will really pick up as you'll learn techniques to help yourself - again it can take time to master them.
X
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Post by monica on Apr 6, 2016 15:22:07 GMT
The panic attack you had sounds horrible . I had these too. PNI is an illness - try to see it this way just as if you'd broken your leg you'd need time to heal, with PNI it can be small baby steps forward. Dont be discouraged if you have a bad experience or day - this part of recovering. You're a fantastic mum and wife and look how hard you're trying to get better - that says a lot x
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Post by Kirsty on Apr 6, 2016 16:17:48 GMT
Thank you Monica! I'm so desperate to get back to my old self if not a better version for my husband and daughter! They are my life! Hopefully it will lift very soon! Anxiety is horrible! Thank you for your kind words xx
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Post by monica on Apr 7, 2016 7:51:33 GMT
Hi
Yes you are so right - anxiety is completely crippling. For me pni was my first real experience of anxiety and it was something else. Even though that pni for me was the probably one of the most awful experiences of my life, it's all a journey and you do learn a lot about yourself - things that you struggle with, triggers and you do learn techniques to help yourself and I think for most of us we do become a lot more compassion. Have hope - it sounds as if you're making progress already and really try and focus on the positives x
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Post by Kirsty on Apr 7, 2016 8:01:16 GMT
What I have learnt already is that it always been an anxious person and never really knew it! Reading about it is interesting in that I have always over thought things but never thought anything of it! Obviously now having PNI has heightened it all and made it into a bigger problem! It's really comforting to know that it effects so many people and they do recover too! My biggest fear is that this is me for life and I will never be the same again! I hope I continue with the progress! It's my hubbys birthday today and we went for a meal last night with family and friends and as we were leaving with the baby I started to have an anxiety attack I didn't think I would get through the evening, but I did and felt better for it! However today I'm feeling very restless and anxious and really do not want to ruin his birthday! Pressure is not good when I'm like this, I just can't help it! I always put pressure on myself to exceed in everything! Maybe that's why suffering with PNI and anxiety has disappointed me so much! Another thing I have learnt and I now understand is that any woman who suffers with PNI is stronger than we or they think! To get through each day is the hardest thing when this illnes has hold of you and to all you women out there suffering, you are doing amazing! Keep going! X
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