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Post by molliesmummy on Mar 25, 2008 9:26:44 GMT
plain and simple, have to say it bluntly- but i dont enjoy sex anymore.
its nothing like it used to be with dp.
is it the pnd or baby or what?
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Post by gizmoracer on Mar 25, 2008 9:49:20 GMT
Probably a bit of both to be honest. Alot of women have this problem when they have children because you have trouble relaxing and end up waiting for the baby to wake up, consequently you don't want to get too involved incase you have to cut it short. Which in tern stops you from wanting it.
The PND will probably have a big factor on this as well. Have a nose through some of the other threads in this section and you will see it is something almost everyone on here has had problems with. Personally I can say it will get better as you get better. In the last few months my drive has returned as I have recovered, and things are much better now than they were before. The main problem most people have is trying to explain this to their OHs as men can be very sensitive and will automatically think you have gone off them. It is best to talk to him than hide it though coz its worse if they sence it.
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Post by littlelotty on Mar 25, 2008 10:29:30 GMT
Hi Mollies Mummy
I have gone off sex since my LO was born 18 months ago and it has still not returned so you are not the only one. I hope like Giz says when I recover my sex drive will return but she is right to talk to you OH as I am going to relate to talk to mine about many things but affection and sex is one of them as he feels I don't want him and he is now understanding this is not the case.
Take Care
LittleLotty
xx
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Post by gizmoracer on Mar 25, 2008 11:36:15 GMT
just wanted to say good on you littlelottie. I can't stress enough how important it is to have a supportive OH with this illness and relationships suffer so much. When one partner doesn't feel wanted orr needed it soon rubs off on the other and there are so many couple who could split up over something like this and for the fault of no-one really. Its very hard to talk about this sort of thing and I think you are both very brave to bring it up infront of a counseller, it will do you the world of good and hang in there it will return.
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Post by littlelotty on Mar 25, 2008 12:32:34 GMT
Hi Giz
thanks for those very kind words. We actually split up for six months whilst I was still in denial and was starting to lose the plot a bit and I was so nasty to him so he is amazing to take me back after all of this. It was because as well I finally admitted I needed help and got on the medication but I have put him through hell! He knew I had PNI for over a year but he said you just would not listen and pushed everyone away!
Relate is doing so much good for our relationship and would recommend it to anyone before the problems get too big! They are helping us to communicate much better and my OH is understanding alot of my issues.
I have said if we can get through the last couple of years we can get through anything. A bit like you and your OH I think having PNI has made our relatonship so much stronger! (wierd I know)
Take Care
LittleLotty
xx
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Post by winegirl on Mar 25, 2008 18:21:33 GMT
If its any consolation, I havent just gone of sex, I HATE IT. Bit odd considering i enjoyed it so much before! I think it can be a PNI thing and a post birth thing, but I am assured it does get better in time!
WG x
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