Other good birth stories.

[gizmoracer]

I have been having a brief nose through some of these stories and like Sianyc thought it would be nice to hear a few more positive ones. I am also curious as to how many of you have not had a problem with the birth of your children but have still developed PNI. It seems to be a stigma that in order to truly suffer with PNI you have to have a bad experience in birth and not bonded with your babies. For me it is the opposite. So I hope this doesn't offend anyone.

Anyway to the point. My son was born Monday 28th Oct 2002. The strange thing was I can pinpoint the exact interlude when he was conceived, and suffered morning sickness from quite literally a few hours later, I also knew from day one he was a boy. Weird Anyway to the point. Throughout the pregnancy I suffered with nasty morning (midday, afternoon, evening and night time) sickness. Whoever called it morning sickness I was rarely physically sick, other than when I managed to give myself food poisoning but felt it all the time. On the plus side I actually lost weight whilst pregnant. (gained only 10lb right through, and he alone weighed 7lb 3oz). I was desperate for a water birth, although hubby tried countless times to put me off the idea. Here in Watford we have a birthing center attached to the hospital and that was where I was going come hell or high water, terrified of hospitals and even more so of epidurals and c sections. I knew In the ABC ward I was safely far enough away from such things but also close enough should something go wrong. So there I was Merrily waddling around like a beached whale on my due date (18th) waiting for something to happen, coz its gonna be oh so easy, walk in the park. Yeah ok well they do say ignorance is bliss. But nice and snug in my belly was where he was determined to stay. To cut a long story short I needed 3 membrane sweeps to encourage any form of contraction. Bounced back home from hospital on the Sunday morning and happily announced to my Nan who almost feel off her chair. 'Midwife says I'm having contractions, and I just drove home and I feel great this is going to be sooo easy, will be home this evening with baby' Not quite. The contractions continued they even got quite strong during the night and by Monday lunchtime I was on the phone saying I'm coming in. Not a happy bunny, I'm congratulated that I am technically in labour, oh and oops I appear to have ruptured your waters whilst checking, but have ages to go yet so may as well go home By this time I'm worried about the traffic and refuse to move. It was great on the ABC, you have your own room and en suite, a sensory room and the midwives leave you to it. If anyone has seen the Tweenies episode where Fizz has a baby brother they show the very same room I was in ;D However, like I said they had ruptured my waters but only one, this made my contractions tremendously painful on top of a panicky first time Mum with a very butch midwife in tow. I'll be honest, wasn't enjoying myself at this point. I was given a pethidine jab to relax me (all it did was give me a sore bum) and after a sleep, lots of walking and breaking my waters fully I was offered a bath. Its coming on 8pm now. I was delighted to learn my midwife was going home at 8pm. She helped me into the birthing pool and left me with a very relaxed midwife who basically told me to do what my body felt it needed to. Half hour later, I'm cuddling a content, clean baby boy. No stitches either. But much to my disapproval was told to stay over night, it was too late and I was the colour of the Simpsons.

My second birth story is much shorter, well done to those of you still following.

My daughter was due on my birthday 1st April 2004. After Jason being so late I started on the old wives tails early this time. I invested in a pot of vindaloo powder and put it on everything for a week including my cornflakes not recommended. Kept my legs crossed all through my birthday just in case. But had a strange feeling the following morning. Steve was on nights and had just come home. I told him to phone work and say he wasn't coming in that night and sent him to bed. I then rang my Mum and asked her to take Jason for the day. Dad bless him panicked and said he would be straight over. I said no no nothings happening, wait till rush hours over with. Basically Jason was only 17 months old and has a strong bond with my Mum so I wanted her to have him when I did go into labour. Anyway Like I said Dad panicked and came straight over. Odd thing is seconds after they got here I started getting contractions. Real, big contractions. I was promptly reminded 'the second one comes quicker' so I rang the hospital ABC ward again. When the midwife heard me and realized it was my second I was told 'get here now'. I woke Steve and said right we're going. It was all so funny. I'm under the impression we have got ages as is Steve, he wants to stop at the shop on the way there. But Dad is going loopy and threatening to leave without him coz he doesn't want to deliver the baby in the car lol So off we go, all I'm worried about is if we are going to get another water birth. Made it there and up the stairs (just) oh the poor poor trainee midwife that showed me to my room. She asked Steve how long I'd been having contractions. He was still half asleep and didn't know what was going on. Her response was 'don't worry, can you just pick up that phone for me and dial ...' The next response was 'Help, I can see a head'. I couldn't believe it less than 5 Min's later I've got a baby in my arms. Steve goes rushing off to phone home and misses my Dad picking Mum and Jason up by a few seconds. God knows where he went to phone though coz we were waiting ages for him to come back and cut the cord. So there you have it, first labour 38 hours, second 1 1/2 hours. If I have anymore, think I'll buy a net, just in case.

I won't go into where my PNI came from only that I have had it since Jason was 3 weeks old and have never got rid of it at all yet. But I wanted to air the fact that it is possible to be happy with your birth experience and still suffer.

Anyone else got a good birth story?

[yoyo]

Wow That was a v quick second one!!!

As you say PNI doesn't always bear any relation to pregnancy / events / birth trauma / bonding etc - they say these can be triggers but some women have all of them and no PNI - others have none of them and PNI. I'm sure there's much more hormonal and chemical evidence that needs looking at too.

LOL - yeah careful if you ever go in for number 3 !!!

[elf]

Hi,

I definitely fit into the category of a good birth but miserable PNI so I thought I would post my story...

Looking back, I had a pretty good pregnancy. I was struck by progesterone poisoning at about six weeks. (you're right, whoever called it morning sickness needs their legs slapping.) Like you, I was rarely physically sick (other than a few interesting days at about 10 weeks and some serious gagging issues as a result of a lousy cold (no-one told me that your immune system shuts down!) but I did feel as though I was permanently on a boat in a storm and was constantly exhausted. I used to fantasise about crawling under my desk at work and going to sleep. Generally though, once that passed I was pretty healthy on the whole. I was pretty fit and in fact was in the gym working out as usual (well, with some modifications as I could not fit into some of the weight machines) the day before I gave birth. the worst aspect for me was having feet and then legs that swelled to elephantine proportions toward the end. Delightful.

I had been having an on-going row with the NHS about my due date. They insisted that I was due on the 12th August based on my cycle, despite me pointing out that my cycles were much longer than normal and anyway I was fairly sure I knew when I had conceived (distressingly I suspect it was the night that DH, happily declared "job done"... ;D ). I had taken myself privately (Fetal Medicine Centre in London) for an early (6 weeks) dating scan and a detailed nuchal scan at 12 weeks as I was concerned about my age (then 37) and they had put me 10 days later (which tied up with my dates). I eventually got the NHS doctors to concede. So how annoyed was I when Rowan turned up 10 days early?!!

My waters broke at about 2.00a.m. Saturday morning. I had just waddled back from the loo (for the 100th time that night) and winched myself back into bed when I heard and felt a loud 'pop'. Then the gush...and the rush back to the loo. When I finally managed to get up without flooding the place (left DH to clean up the bed and floor ) I called the hospital, had a shower, washed my hair had a cuppa and some toast whilst we both scrutinised my suddenly changed profile (babe had very clearly "dropped") and then we drove in to be checked. They confirmed that I had not gone into labour (no pain) and sent me home to wait. We got home at about 5.00 a.m. It was surreal to just wander around 'waiting'. More tea and toast then. DH went to sleep on the sofa. I pottered. Thought about going to the gym ( ;D, no, not really - if only for the fact that my waters were still flowing cheerfully), decided instead on the ironing. At about 7.a.m I started having braxton hicks - not unusual as I had been having those strongly for about a month. thought I would start timing them in case they started turning into the real deal. It soon became apparent that, actually, they were happening every four minutes - without fail. Hmm. Okaayy. Carried on pottering around the house as they gradually started to become a bit uncomfortable, then gradually a bit painful. Then, "Martin, wake up, I think it's time to go in". Felt a bit of a fraud driving in (sat on a waterproof sheet and several house bricks claiming to be maternity pads) as, between contractions I felt fine. By the time we checked in I was unable to speak during contractions - ok, not a fraud then. By this time it had gone 9.00a.m. The midwife put a monitor belt thingy on my bump and wandered off. DH loved the monitor because it meant he could watch the contractions on the screen and could make helpful observations along the lines of, "Ooh, that was a good one - it spiked high for ages". No? Really? By 10.00a.m I was curled into a foetal ball on the bed (bu**er the monitor), still half dressed. Midwife returned and put me on gas and air. I was in a LOT of pain and desperately needed to push - I was scared of how I was going to last like this for several more hours. If it was this bad now, how the hell was I going to make it? the midwife said I was panicking and should have pethidine to stop me pushing. That was the one drug I had insisted I did not want. I said I would have it. DH talked me out of it (as I had instructed him). I lasted a few more LONG contractions. Decided I needed the damn drug. Midwife went out to get it, then checked me. I was fully dilated - it was about 10.45a.m. "Push all you like" was now the general instruction. Rowan arrived half an hour later - with me still in the foetal position! I had just about relinquished the gas and air for long enough to scream that something was happening and could someone please left my leg! Placenta was out quickly and I kept hold of my new best friend (the gas and air pipe) whilst I was stitched up. the yet MORE tea and toast whilst Rowan latched on. (7lb 7oz - but covered in vernix so clearly a little early - NHS due date or not).

By the way, how gross is that first shower?! You're in a scene from the Texas chainsaw Massacre, shaking and in shock with a belly that looks and feels like a collapsing water bed.

The whole thing lasted less then three and half hours - and I was at home for a couple of them. It hurt as though I was being ripped apart (probably a reason for that...) but it was a good birth.

All of that said, my overriding emotion was relief that it was over for the rest, it did feel real. I cannot say I bonded -DESPITE the fact that I held Rowan immediately - cord connected and all and DESPITE the fact that he latched on so well. It just did not feel real. Saturday night came (still in hospital). He did not sleep, I did not sleep. He screamed. I cried. No-one helped. Things dissolved from there.

So I can safely say that I did have a very positive (and incredibly quick given that he was my first - and only- child) birth story. DH was great (much to his own surprise - he had gagged horribly at the waters breaking!), the midwife was in and out of the room but, on the whole, calm and efficient. I had no complications (other than how do you get out of the shower without getting covered in blood again?!) and Rowan was whole and healthy (peed on the midwife as soon as he was out of the tunnel, so to speak).

As an aside, I believe that my own PNI was born in part out of some of my own past issues and in (major) part the awful, sleep-deprived, fearful, frustrated, unrelenting reality of his Reflux. It's complicated and I have neither unravelled it or recovered from it yet. I love my son but cannot say I have yet really bonded. I would not wish him away now that he is here, but if I had a time-machine I cannot honestly say I would do it all again. I am not there yet. I hope to be one day. But I cannot blame his birth - there, I was very lucky I know.

And I have never in my life eaten so much toast in a 12 hour period ;D ;D.

Love,

Elf

[sare]

I too had a good birthing experience.

I had always wanted a home birth, even before planning a family , and I made this clear to my midwife who said that it would be ok so long as my pg progressed without complication.

I HATED being pg. I had 'morning' sickness all the way through, this is also the time my IBS started, was suffering stress at work, tired all the time... generally didn't feel very good!

Because I was having a home birth my midwife wanted me to meet all the other's within the clinic so that I would know whoever was on duty when I went into labour. Well, my appt with Karen was booked at my home on the Friday morning. I got up on that Friday and had a show. Then my waters were slowly going all day/evening. At 2.30 Saturday morning I started to get period like cramps and called Karen out (bless her). She said my back waters had broken I was 1cm dilated and to get some sleep. I was so wired I had about 2 hours!!

All day Saturday I had terrible backache. Karen came to see me at 3.30 on the Saturday afternoon and told me that if I nothing had happened by Sunday morning then I had to go into hospital for 9am as my waters had started to go and there was a risk of infection. I was gutted and decided to go for a walk to 'get things going'. It wasn't considered by me or th midwife that I was in labour at this time.

Well, I didn't make it out! 10 minutes later I stood up and my waters broke with a huge contraction! This was about 4.30. By 5.30 my contractions were 10 mins apart so we phoned poor Karen, who was still on call, who said she would eat and get to me as soon as she could. When she arrived at 6pm my contractions were 3 mins apart, I was fully dilated and ready to push! She called the other on call midwife (who wasn't very happy cos she had just sat down to dinner with friends in a restaurant!). At 9.45 my beautiful baby girl cam into the world with no intervention, no pain relief (not even gas and air) and no stitches!

I loved her instantly.