More babies?!??

[yoyo]

After 'talking' with a few of you on email and reading your posts I thougt I'd start a new thread about more babies.

I personally am going through the whole should I shouldn't I go for another baby thing. I don't want one jst yet but it's something I think about from time to time.

Thing is - I'm struggling with this one. I know deep down I do want a bro/sis for Jake but I really do not want to put my family through all this - there are no guarantees. Then again I'm not fully recovered yet and when I am I will be able to make a proper decision, one that is for the best. I dont want to let fear of PNI rule my life - I've had enough of that already!

Any thoughts?

[yoyo]

Actually it's quite bizarre that I have even posted this thread - when I was in the pits of PNI even the mention of pregnancy/seeing another pregnant person/mentioning having another baby used to make my visibly ill.

[cheshire]

Hi YoYo

I would agree with what you say about PNI not ruling your life too much. I already have 2 children and may have considered 3, but my husband has been v. ill and this is really what has put us both off trying again. But I have considered whether PNI would have affected having a 3rd if we'd wanted one, and I think ultimately not in the end - but like you I'd have also wanted to be feeling a bit better first. Also, I think I would be much more careful - forewarned is forearmed!!! I would take things more slowly...home birth was great - but I think I was overdoing it from day one, especially as I felt I was looking after hubby too.

Hey, I must admit, it's lovely watching them playing together!
Hopefulxx

[natalie1985]

Hey YoYo!
I'm in the same position as you! I would love peter to have a sibling, but at the same time, i'm scared of getting PNI again, aswell as going through the physical change again, i'm not sure if i could handle it!! I found the physical change SO hard to deal with, i'm too scared to go throuhg it again. I also don't think i could cope with another child.
It's such a hard decision. Like you said, you don't want your family to go through it again, there are so many factors to consider.
Natalie xxxx

[natalie pp]

Jsut wanted to add, I am in the same position, sonwnating another child, but so scrared of PP reaccuring or PNI!!

I suppose as with all things time is a great healer and with time I will be able to accept what happened and move forward regardless.

Forewarned is forarmed fare enough, but if you've been in our shoes then surely caution is a good thing

Take care all

Natalie (the other one)

[natalie]

ABOVE

Not a guest, I just always forget to login and then I write things I dont want to loose

Natalie x

[cheshire]

Hi Natalie

So lovely to hear from you

Hopefulxx

[susanneb1984]

For health reasons I'm not allowed anymore, but I don't think I would want any anyway. I feel that I have come so far this year, meeting you girls, and seeing a counsellor, I feel like I'm on the journey to PNI been a distant memory, but at the same time, Georgina is now 6 weeks old, and I am very aware of PNI.
It's strange, I've just been reading my diary entries, and although I know I am a lot better, I'm almost afraid to stop doing things, I have to always be on the go, I'm scared that if I stop PNI will some how catch up with me, is that stupid?
I don't feel down or anything like that, but to be honest , I haven't sat down long enough to think about how I feel. My house is spotless and all my washing is done, but I still feel that things need doing, hmmmmmm I hope it goes eventually. I've got to the point where my body is on autopilot, although I'm pretty sure that sleepless nights has a big part to play in that!

[Aussie Girl Tracey]

Dear susanneb,
I was reading your last post and i realised that iam doing the same thing i am trying to jam pack my days and keep on the go so i don't think too much about PNI. Are you finding when you slow down PNI vatched up with you again?
Take care Aussie girl

[susanneb1984]

Hiya Aussie,
No I don't feel too bad, I am very tired because baby isn't sleeping to well, but I think it's the fear that is worse. It's bizarre!
I know there is no real reason to assume I will get PNI this time, but I think once you've had it, your always aware of it. I am hoping that awareness will save me this time.

[Veritee]

As those who know me on here - this is a question dear to my heart!!

As you know I was too scared to have another baby while I still had any vestige of PNI in me....

and then when I was well it was too late - I had reached an early menopause...

I do at my most negative feel that PNI cheated me out of the family I wanted..

I now have a lovely daughter who I enjoy having around, so of course I would like another child to enjoy..

But it is not to be and personally I am also grateful for having had a child at all - despite PNI it was more than worth it.

So I think this is a very personal decision to make and yes I will not deny they their is a risk you will get it again - but also you may not ..

And all I can say is that PNI is awful while you suffer it but only a short time in the life of the child you have it with, 1, 5 or even 10 years is not long when you have a child that will be on this earth for and average of 70?

I know that they will not be children forever but they will always be your child..

On the other hand I am now getting my freedom back - only just as even a 16 year old needs her parents , especially as we live in a very rural area and she can not yet drive and Barry and I are able to spend time together in a way we have not been able to since she was born ..

Well thats all I can say - their are positives about having a further child but also positives of not

it is a very personal decision - and to a degree I think having children is something we rationalize but we do not really do it for theses reasons - obviously it is a basic instinct to reproduce and we just do it if the time is right and our bodies are able.

All the best

Veritee

[angel]

i had PNI with my first baby and although i didn't let it put me off having another one at the time i was paranoid about having it again second time round and although i think i did have it again i found it easier to cope with the second time. maybe i was a bit more prepared so i certainly would say not to let it put you off if you really want another child but i think thats the question that you have to ask yourselves could you cope again.

[yorkslass]

HI

I was like you scared of having another baby as of the scare of having PND again.

I had a mishap and got pregnant while still suffering for a long time with PND I was so scared of what now. I had so much in my head like what now do i have to stop tablets will i get worse will.

I actually did not realise I was preg until i had not had periods for 2 mths as at first i thought it was because we had had some upset in my family but as the case was not to be it was that I was preg with my 3rd child.

So I was 9 weeks when I had my first appointment with my midwife I told her all my fears and she was great and she said that they would keep an eye on me, I was also sent to see my consultant to do with my meds and they told me it was safer for me to keep taking them as to stop them.

Any way to cut a long story short because I have been getting more help and support from different agency's(not family) i seen to have got better and not worse as i no longer have PND but do have a beautiful baby boy who is now 7mths old.

[dolly]

Hi

I'm so broody at the moment. I would love another baby but I'm petrified of the delivery (as mine went very badly) and of getting PNI again.

I really value having a sibling myself as my brother and I are very close. We have stuck together and supported each other through our family breaking up, my father having a nervous break down and my mother dying 6 yaers ago from falling down the stairs. I really want my litle girl to have someone she can turn to if something should happen to me or my husband and more importantly have the chance to have the kind of relationship I have with my brother.

I don't want PNI to win and I feel if it does, myself, my husband and my little girl will be cheated out of the opportunity.

I've made the decsision that in a year or so we will try again but when that time comes I'm scared I won't feel the same as I'm very much still in recovery.

dolly
x

[natalie]

I'm still scared of having another baby, but getting used to the idea. Before I saw the specialist I was all for it, thinking well I've had counselling etc, what else can crop up!!

Well reality check is I may suffer PP again, or PNI this time round, but I have to remember that the doctors etc... know me now and there will be all there can be in place to make this time round better, IF I do become poorly.

Hey my chances are 50/50 now, and they were 75% in favour 18 months ago, so lets hope that all our glasses are half full, and remember the precious munchkins we will get out of the whole picture.

I'm not pregnat yet by the way, still holding off till spring, and then who knows there may be some mirical cure by then!!

Love to all


Natalie