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Post by cheshire on Nov 3, 2005 20:18:34 GMT
Hi Natalie
Hope it all works out for you - you're right in that forewarned is forearmed and they'd hopefully all be behind you this time.
You're right, the munchkins are worth it!!
Hopefulxxx
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Post by monica on Nov 8, 2005 19:33:11 GMT
Dear Yoyo
Bizarrely enuogh I think about this alot . I got PNI after my second child. although I'm much better I'm not fully recovered by any means, however, sometimes I get so broody, particularly a few months ago. I know what you mean about coping. I find it so hard to cope with 2, let alone another one adn there are so many questions how would I manage, would the kids benefit from another sibling, would I get PNi again, but at times there is this really strong desire to have another one.
I totally agree that you shouldn't let PNI rule your life, but I find it did limit me considerably. I guess time is a great healer, so maybe in a few months time, when you feel much better, you might look at things differently.
Sorry about the waffling!
Monica
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Post by yoyo on Nov 9, 2005 9:52:21 GMT
It's a tricky one isn't it? I think as you get better and better you just know that you'll get through it if it did happen if that's the way you want your family to go. At the moment I'm in no hurry to rush in for another baby - my current one is soooo demanding and active I couldn't possibly fit another one in! LOL
I think though that if you actually sit down and think things through you'd never do anything much - there's often never a 'right time' to do things.
All good fun eh?
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twinmummy not logged
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Post by twinmummy not logged on Apr 7, 2006 0:17:49 GMT
This is such a good thread. I remember whilst in the throes of PNI I would never have dreamed of risking going through it again for another baby. But once I was on the way to recovery, the horror of the PNI faded and I changed my mind. I felt it was worth the risk and I so wanted another child. I did get pregnant again and unfortunately got PNI for the second time. Even though my family and I were forewarned and forearmed second time around, the PNI was worse and lasted much longer. This I feel was due to the circumstances surrounding the pregnancy (with twins) and the fact that one twin nearly died and had lots of complications. So there were a lot of extra factors that worsened and prolonged the PNI second time around. (The twins are absolutely perfect now by the way!) Of course everybody is different and nothing is certain in this world. But for me I know that when I decided to go for the second pregnancy I had to do it with the idea uppermost in my mind that PNI was a very real possibility again. I personally couldn't have gone into it thinking 'no, it wont happen to me again' . I was more like ' yeah, it probably will happen again, I am willing to take that chance and I'll fight the b*st*rd if it comes!'. And boy did it come! BUT ......... I would go through it all yet again (did I really just say that ) .... if it wasn't for the lack of time, money, space, energy, brain cells etc. ;D I can honestly say with hand on heart (and of course because I no longer have PNI!) that my 3 beautiful children were worth every split second of the torture and pain that PNI put me through. They have taken away the awful memories of that illness and replaced them with good ones, just by being here. My little angels
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Post by sarajay28 on Apr 7, 2006 9:28:26 GMT
Hi girls, I have just been reading all the posts in this thread and felt i had to add my thoughts on this as its something i think about alot!!! I have 3 kids and have only had PNI with the last 2, i had an horrific birth with my first and last baby and the best experience with my 2nd? ? I was really worried this time about getting PNI but i told my midwifes my concerns right from the start and they were quite willing to listen to my fears and try to re-assure me and i felt that when the time came because everyone knew i was vulnerable they too were quietly keeping an eye out. I knew when Nathan was 6/7 weeks that i was starting to feel 'different' and i mentioned it to my partner and HV and they were fantastic. Eventually i did feel horrendous and quickly got help/meds and now Nathan is nearly 9 months old and i feel i'm fully recovered. So i think it goes to show that 'Forewarned is definately Forarmed' and as someone above said a few months of hell is a small price to pay for years of joy and happiness that a child brings you. I would like another baby (yep i know, 4 kids, i've definatly lost the plot!!!LOL) but its the pregnancy bit i hate!!! I am not good at being pregnant and if i could have a baby without this part (that would be mine and robbies biologically) then i would have another tomorrow. hahaha. Anyway don't know if this will help anyone make any decisions but i just want to re-assure you that PNI DOES get better, it just takes time. Loadsa Love Sarah.xxx
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Post by susanneb1984 on Apr 7, 2006 11:41:02 GMT
Well, I won't be having anymore. It's not just the fear of pni, I was extremely mentally ill whilst pregnant with GJ, and I think it put both me and Alan off! The labour was very difficult with GJ, and it's a pain I certainly haven't forgotten, it's so vivid that talking about it for a long period of time actually makes me physically sick! So I'd best leave it there! No more for me.
Susanne xxx
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Post by noodles on Apr 9, 2006 19:37:31 GMT
i hate the idea of having another baby, i only ever planned to have one and one i shall have, every one keeps saying that my feeling will change but i hope not!!! i love my little girl and i hope to show her the world and spoil her to death... yes i want a spoilt brat, that thought of having another and going through all this again makes my tummy turn!!! xxxx
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hannah457
Senior Member
i have 4 children. brandon,angel , peter, leland .
Posts: 453
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Post by hannah457 on Apr 9, 2006 21:13:39 GMT
having more children isn't that bad. Ive been thought pni with all my babies, i know that if i have have other i will most properly get pni again. but i also know that my pni will go away in the end. i must admit thought my pni got worse with each baby Ive had. but if you want another talk though it with your g.p, health visitor cos you can be helped for pni straight away after your baby's born
Hannah xx
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Post by susanneb1984 on Apr 11, 2006 13:50:05 GMT
Yeah I agree Hannah, When I was pregnant with GJ, they provided me with extra support, both throughout the pregnancy and after she was born.
Susanne xxx
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Post by yoyo on Apr 11, 2006 20:31:07 GMT
It really is a questino I think we ought not think about until fully or very nearly better - it's funny, for the first time since Jake was born I actually thought maybe we ought to have a baby, not right now but maybe when Jake is about 3 or something. No idea where that came from - just hope it's a desire I can surpress for a while as even without PNI (I'd definitely want to be so on the ball with it if it did happen again) Jake is such a live wire and rediciulously active baby if my next one was like him I'd be in a right state! He wears me out already - although I'm sure he'll come in to his own as he becomes more independent etc.
Funny how you change (mind you that's today and I'm feeling all loved up - who knows what tomorrow brings eh).
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Post by cazfletcher on Sept 5, 2006 18:54:41 GMT
if i met the right man and had support right from the start i would like to think i was good enough to have another child
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Post by yoyo on Sept 9, 2006 21:00:46 GMT
Odd - I've so changed my mind o the whole more babies thing - as I've got better and better I realise that I can't risk PNI again, it's not fair on anyone especially Jake who would be old enough to understnad a bit more of what was going on. In fact hubby & I are going to probably take more drastic steps to stop us having more babies - I know now this is the right decision for us x x
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