|
|
Post by meadow on Nov 25, 2011 20:37:30 GMT
Thanks Juppster. Another short update. Again was calm today, but again did shout at my son for a couple of things. The situations really didn't need me to shout - but I did it anyway! Never mind, the rest of the day was fine without me shouting. Worryingly my daughter was ill, but she seems a lot better now after sleeping for 3 hours this afternoon. It was strange having time to myself whilst she slept and I didn't know what to do with myself. LOL
|
|
|
|
Post by juppster on Nov 26, 2011 19:05:43 GMT
Ah, hope your little one was feeling back to herself today xx
|
|
|
|
Post by Weeble on Nov 26, 2011 21:06:43 GMT
How are you doing today meadow? Yelled at my son today it was not his fault so u r not the only one.
Kat
|
|
|
|
Post by meadow on Nov 28, 2011 19:54:28 GMT
Hello. I was sick on Saturday night and feeling very ill on Sunday. My parents took the children on Sunday afternoon so that helped. But my daughter wasn't herself all weekend, off her food, etc. And then she was sick on Sunday night, so I feel terrible that she had to spend the day at my parents on Sunday when probably all she wanted was to be at home. We had a quiet day together watching kids TV and Peppa Pig DVDs.
But the meadow thing is going well and I'm feeling much better generally.
Except I saw a news item on the internet as I was coming here, and it has upset me. I won't repeat it because I don't want to upset anyone else. It was about child cruelty. Is making me feel sick. I never watch the news, read newspapers or the internet as I find the world so awful and upsetting and it is one of the things that sends me down. Then I glimpsed this tonight on Yahoo and it was awful. Why did I look? I'll have to forget about it.
Cheers, Kat. I know I'm not the only one really who shouts. But I do think I'm often completely OTT and my poor children don't know what is going on. And then I worry so much about what I'm teaching them, and how I'm failing them - they'll never be able to have proper friendships or relationships because of my behaviour. Right now I can see I'm projecting way into the future and it's not right to worry about that. But of course, when these thoughts come to me I can't see that sensible stuff.
|
|
|
|
Post by Weeble on Nov 28, 2011 20:44:52 GMT
Hi meadow
Pleased you are ok. I think many of us have problems with the news. My take on it is we are designed to be scared of the unlikely for the sake of our kids. It used to be an evolutionary advantage to be worried and scared for our kids, after all sabre tooth tigers and cliffs needed to be avoided. When we have kids they are so precious these things worry us, because they are the modern equilvalent to mammoths and wolves.
Kat
|
|
|
|
Post by wanagetoverthis on Nov 28, 2011 22:28:54 GMT
I can't read or watch the new either Meadow as it sends me into thought patterns I don't like!
N xxx
|
|
|
|
Post by meadow on Nov 28, 2011 23:30:18 GMT
Aww, thanks for telling me that. I feel I'm being insular and non-interested in the world when I don't know what is going on. Good to know I'm not the only one. It is awful how it sends my mind off thinking and just easier to avoid.
|
|
|
|
Post by juppster on Nov 29, 2011 10:45:09 GMT
Have to agree with the girls, there are certain things i just cannot watch on the news. My cbt therapist once told me to avoid all negative things such as the news, newspapers etc so it's really not uncommon xx
|
|
|
|
Post by monica on Nov 29, 2011 21:14:35 GMT
Hi
When in the depths of pni I too couldn't handle bad news programs etc. In the end I avoided stuff like that. It won't be forever but you need that breathing space to recover. You are defo not alone in that. It is. Common symptom. How has today been for you?
Moica
|
|
|
|
Post by meadow on Nov 29, 2011 23:39:17 GMT
Another good day today. It is helping me so much to update in this diary. Knowing that I've somewhere to put my progress and actions is really making me think about what I do and how I react.
Kept my temper today whilst daughter wouldn't get ready before school. She was naked until about 5 minutes before we left the house. Being late (for anything!) stresses me. I nearly told the school how difficult I find it and could my son be late if necessary so that I don't completely lose control. But thought better of it in the end - don't want to tell the teachers that I am depressed and don't want the school to think I lose control and batter the children. However, this Meadow thing is doing wonders in that I just think about being in the meadow and that stops me going OTT and stressing about being late, because really it does not matter. And if I let it matter then I'll fall over the cliff again. Then didn't go mad at son at dinner time either even though he was just having a tantrum, I can't even remember what that was all about. But gave him 5 minutes time out and ignored him until he had calmed down.
So do feel positive again today. Cheers for the support on seeing the news. I didn't realise it was so common.
|
|
|
|
Post by Weeble on Nov 30, 2011 7:17:12 GMT
Well done on yesterday, you are developing some great coping mechanisms. Don't worry about telling the school. I had to tell my sons and they were nothing but supportive
Hope today is ok
Kat
|
|
|
|
Post by meadow on Dec 8, 2011 18:48:33 GMT
I'm not in a good place. I think I've fallen off the cliff. I've been low since last Wednesday. I should've come on here and written down what has happened. But there's never any time when I'm like this. I shouldn't be here now as it's bed time for the children and I should be dealing with them, but really want to shout at someone, so came here instead. I want to shout about how unfair this is, and how I've let myself down again. I'll probably get some time later to get it all off my chest.
|
|
|
|
Post by juppster on Dec 8, 2011 19:21:44 GMT
Please do shout on here...get it all out, we are all listening xx
|
|
|
|
Post by monica on Dec 8, 2011 20:06:13 GMT
Here and listening whenever you're ready to talk. Don't be hard on yourself , though. It's a difficult time and upsetting things can get you down easilyx
|
|
