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Post by quantumrose on May 31, 2017 5:42:51 GMT
Thank you for your messages Monica, Brach and Kirsty xxx
We're all moved, it was fine, exhausting and hard work but fine. Such a different and better life awaits us. Swum in the sea everyday since we got here! It's like being on holiday. I've been feeling good but yesterday was low. I'm now getting a few good days in a row, which is amazing. Makes the low days worse though. The old thoughts are creeping in but I'm hoping they don't get too bad. My mh nurse is using me as her case study as she's specializing in trauma and postnatal health. She's amazing. I haven't been here for a while, tbh I'm worried I've let you all down by not continuing with the sertraline.
Big love x
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Post by monica on May 31, 2017 7:50:15 GMT
No no no! You haven't let anyone down! You have to do what's best for you and your the best judge of the that. Life sounds pretty good for you - so pleased the house move went well and your beach life idyllic ! Brilliant news about the MH nurse - it sounds as if finally you're getting the support you need and it's making a difference. Yes lows can be so hard after longer good periods but it's really positive in recovery terms x
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Post by brach24 on May 31, 2017 23:15:44 GMT
Haha! I'd have a cheek to feel let down - I only took one sertraline before I gave up on it!! Glad move is done and swimming everyday sounds amazing!!! I know what you mean about the bad days being harder when you're beginning to feel better good days. Would love things to be easier for you for a bit now. Xx
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Post by quantumrose on Jun 4, 2017 18:14:38 GMT
My sons got chickenpox and hubbys got tonsilitis again. I'm expecting the chickenpox to go round all the children so I'm preparing myself for the long haul. Today was really tough.
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Post by monica on Jun 4, 2017 19:40:27 GMT
Oh no! Not the next round of illnesses - fingers crossed its not too bad. How's the new house? X
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Post by monica on Jun 4, 2017 19:40:47 GMT
And of course how are you? X
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Post by brach24 on Jun 5, 2017 13:50:36 GMT
Ugh - hope it spreads quickly and you get out the other end super fast. Baking soda in the bath was a huge relief for me (I got it as a teenager!) Hope the cabin fever isn't too bad. Time to build a den in the living room!! Xx
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Post by quantumrose on Jun 8, 2017 14:57:56 GMT
I need to get some stuff off ny chest really badly. Since moving house a week ago I have seen one friend. She came over on her way from work because she was passing my way. For once I haven't been shy about the fact that I'm lonely, I've asked almost every good friend if they were free for a cuppa and a natter and all of them had their reasons for not being able to. So I feel not only lonely but a mixture of upset and let down. They don't owe me anything, I know that. It's not their responsibility to make me feel better, it's mine. But to be honest I'm feeling at a bit if a low eb and some help on that front would be so good right now. I haven't been able to get to councelling or have my mental health nurse round for two weeks now because of moving house and chickenpox. Im feeling really cut loose again and I hate it because I feel like Im blaming other people for the way I feel. I've been in with the kids, on my own for 5 days. My husband has tonsilitus again and is grumpy and distracted (understandably) but he's my only interaction with an adult and it's not good. I feel needy but neglected. I booked myself a massage after the move because I knew my body would be hurting but I had to cancel it because of not having the money. I feel like I'm being pulled in a million different directions and nothing I do is good enough or worse, noticed. I'm so sorry for moaning, I really am. I am ok generally. But the last few weeks have totally taken it out of me and I can't see how to get back on ny feet again. I will though....won't I? X
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Post by quantumrose on Jun 8, 2017 15:46:12 GMT
Just wanted to come back to the fact that I'm feeling neglected slightly... I went out to vote earlier, took the baby. It was emotional anyway because the polling station was in the kids old school (didn't have time to change my address) so I had to go back to our old area to vote. Hubby is at home today because he's ill so he looked after older two. When I got back they were all shouting and fighting. I find it really upsetting when my husband shouts and that happens more and more these days. I sometimes feel like get just doesn't know how to relate or communicate with them. He says things like "move!" when he needs them to walk somewhere....I hate it. If someone spoke to me like that id feel like crap and children internalise that language and end up with low self worth. I've spoken to him may times about it, nothing changes. It sometimes feels like I work so hard for both of us to build a happy and content family. He just puts them front of the telly. Ugh. I'm just feeling exhausted and low, he is poorly after all....
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Post by quantumrose on Jun 8, 2017 17:21:11 GMT
Hubby and I just had a massive row. I feel like he's completely pulled the rug out from under me and I feel so hurt. He said that I'm clearly not coping as well as I could with the children and that I should go to the drs. And that we should register the children with the school rather than homeschool. I'm totally floored by his response. It's not hard to see why I'm needing some reassurance and finding things stressful. .The baby literally follows me round the house wailing until I pick her up. So I either do everything awkwardly or painfully with her on my hip (I can't even wee without her standing front of me crying) or I hear her getting upset which I absolutely hate. M has chickenpox and is grumpy and sad. My daughter has her own upsets about leaving her friends and school and hubby has tonsilitus. Not to mention having just moved house and organised a birthday party. I mean, it's not outrageous that I feel like I do- run ragged and in need of a break, is it? Do I need to go to the doctors and explain that life is stressful? No. And get knows its a massive deal for me anyway. I just don't know where to turn and I feel completely alone :-(
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Post by quantumrose on Jun 8, 2017 17:23:30 GMT
Forgot to add, there are no school places anyway. So we are applying but won't get a place till at least Sep. I can't commute for an hr and a half 4 times every day to their old school.
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Post by monica on Jun 8, 2017 21:34:39 GMT
So much exhausting and frustrating stuff going on for you. No it's not unreasonable you expect some support atm. Could you ask to see the MH nurse?
Perhaps raise these issues with hubby when he's feeling better. He might be more amenable to the issues about the way he speaks to the children , schooling etc - you know what ill, grumpy men are like not that that excuses his behaviour or what he said.
Big hugs for now x
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Post by brach24 on Jun 11, 2017 13:55:01 GMT
Oh qr - that all sounds exhausting - a babe wanting held all the time is just so hard. Hope she settles herself again soon. Sorry you're not feeling supported by hubby. That makes everything tough. Sending love xx
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Post by monica on Jun 13, 2017 14:39:33 GMT
How are you QR? Has the family sickness all gone? Really hoping you're managing to rest a little at least and feeling betterx
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Post by monica on Jun 19, 2017 7:38:21 GMT
How are you QR? X
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