y
New Member
Posts: 9
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Post by y on May 15, 2015 16:53:30 GMT
I'm at the clinic right now trying to get some help
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Post by monica on May 18, 2015 7:22:21 GMT
Hello and welcome
How did u get on at the clinic ? Welcome to the site. These kind of thoughts and fears are a common symptom of pni and can be very distressing. Someone told me its like the protective mothering instinct going into overdrive where u see harm coming to ur child from every source . Often triggers are things you see on tv.
You will recover . Meds and / or counselling Where you learn to retrain your thought processes can be hugely helpfulx
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Post by sarajay28 on May 18, 2015 11:07:49 GMT
Hi how did you get on at the clinic? X
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olive
New Member
Posts: 4
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Post by olive on May 18, 2015 22:13:25 GMT
Hey,
I'm in the US and completely relate to the things you're saying. Most of all, I relate to the maddening frustration you're experiencing trying to get help. The psychologist who doesn't know what you're talking about, for instance... I once tried to count how many counselors, doctors, midwives, etc. I had opened up to to tell them something was wrong. I counted at least 20. It's a twilight zone over here when it comes to mothers' mental wellness. I also understand the tremendous fear you have in telling anyone anything at all. The media is an enormous problem in so many ways. It has spread so much paranoia over the past few decades that parents face scrutiny almost everywhere they turn. Above all, the hardest thing for me, and the thing I struggle most to comprehend, is the extent to which women themselves won't speak of these things to each other. After my final, rock-bottom, glorious breakdown, I recovered and feel more stable than I have, well, since puberty, honestly. There. Is. Hope. Please trust me on this.
I'd love to talk to you, if it would help. You don't have to be afraid.
B.
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olive
New Member
Posts: 4
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Post by olive on May 18, 2015 23:00:18 GMT
One quick note ...
When you're asked that question about wanting to hurt yourself or others, you don't have to answer as yes or no. Try to think of ways you can express it that will let them know you are indeed having a real problem and they need to take you seriously, but you are in no way a danger to yourself or others. "I'm not sure." "They're thoughts I would never act on." These aren't the best examples, but do you know what I mean?
Honestly, I know it sounds nuts, and maybe I am, but I understand your concerns and I would be careful how you answer that, too. It has something to do with mandatory reporting laws, and I'm not sure exactly how it works. I don't know what would happen if you said yes when they asked about thoughts about your child. Here in Iowa, when I finally told my psychiatrist that, yes, I did have thoughts about hurting myself, she told me it was her job to advise me to drive myself immediately to the hospital, do not stop at work to tell them you won't be back in that day, and she would call to let them know I was on my way. It took me a while to get there, and the hospital did note that. I wondered, if I hadn't shown up, if the police would have been called. They will things called "wellness visits" if harm to self or others is involved. I suspect the hospital might have reported this and I would have gotten a visit.
For me, going to the hospital was actually really helpful. Here I did have doctors who believed me, and I was able to talk freely without fear of repercussions. And, it was the first time I got to sit down and stop taking care of everyone else. People fed me, listened to me, I got to cry as much as I wanted, and be taken care of for the first time in forever. This was a very big deal.
But, my situation may be entirely different than yours. I did have insurance. And I knew my children were very safe and being well taken care of. I don't think the hospital experience is necessarily key to recovery. Finding the right person to talk to was the most important step. Second was probably the rest. Thirdly, my psychiatrist tried different meds based on my family's experiences with mental illness. I tried something people take for bi-polar. And also an a-typical antipsychotic. Outside the hospital, doctors would only look at it as post-partum "depression". Hence, they only tried antidepressants. They never worked. The atypical antipsychotic, on the other hand, was incredible. I only took it for a few weeks - first Abilify, then Risperidone. I've never been keen on drugs, did an all natural birth, etc., etc. I had to stop breastfeeding to do this, but it was so worth it. It made me think "normally" again. Kind of a life-changing thing.
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