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Post by Kirsty on Jun 25, 2017 18:40:39 GMT
What to do when you really want to give up again!? I just can't keep fighting!
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frogface
Private Board (R) Member 
Posts: 938
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Post by frogface on Jun 25, 2017 19:08:27 GMT
One day, one hour, one breath at a time is all you can do. You've fought through these feeling before and you can do it again. What's troubling you?
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Post by Kirsty on Jun 25, 2017 21:46:44 GMT
That this is me forever and just keep wishing for my old life x
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frogface
Private Board (R) Member
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Post by frogface on Jun 26, 2017 10:33:12 GMT
 I suppose your old life will always be a part of you. But remember no one is the same after having kids. Hopefully you will find a part of the current "you" that you can be proud of, your strength, your love for Sophia, the positive things you never knew before. I know how miserable and hard it is but people's lives are not static and neither are you, we are always changing and growing. You're just on an up-hill at the moment but it won't be like this forever. Keep telling yourself that, keep searching for the positives and congratulate yourself on every milestone. You know (for example) I couldn't take on moderating here, that's such an awesome thing to do for the other ladies here. Imagine the difference you are making to other people's lives. It is bigger than you will ever realise. Keep talking and be kind to yourself, it's so easy to slip into the habit of berating ourselves when times are tough. |
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Post by monica on Jun 26, 2017 11:44:28 GMT
This is a blip. Maybe brought on my your daughters fall, house sale, tiredness? You have really been improving - take a step back. I know you might not have been recovering as quickly as you'd like but life has been so much better for you and will be again.
Try to put strategies in place that have helped you before and keep talking x
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Post by Kirsty on Jun 26, 2017 14:40:52 GMT
Thanks girls xx
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Post by monica on Jun 27, 2017 15:03:34 GMT
How are you Kirsty? Hoping you're picking up? X
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Post by Kirsty on Jun 27, 2017 21:04:12 GMT
Yeah picking up thanks Monica hope you're ok x
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Post by monica on Jun 29, 2017 7:18:56 GMT
What triggered the blip ? Glad you're ok - as crap as blips are they are pretty standard during PNI. How are things with the house? X
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Post by Kirsty on Jun 29, 2017 17:49:27 GMT
House is going through but we cannot find anywhere to go we keep getting refused because of the debt management plan! Very distracting and worrying. Iv had to ask my sister if we can move in there if we need too for a while! Feels like a massive step back! How are you? Don't know what caused the blip. Well actually I missed my meds for 4 days and I'm pretty sure it was that! I just want depression to leave me alone now and let me get on with my life xx
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Post by Kirsty on Jul 1, 2017 17:26:27 GMT
Just feeling so lost again!!
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frogface
Private Board (R) Member
Posts: 938
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Post by frogface on Jul 1, 2017 19:35:48 GMT
Don't be too hard on yourself Kirsty - you've a lot on your plate just now and might well be experiencing the effects of missing a couple of med doses. Are you looking after yourself, eating properly and drinking plenty water? Is there anything that has made you feel better in the past - what has "worked" for you previously?
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Post by Kirsty on Jul 1, 2017 20:24:01 GMT
I don't really know what had worked for me really I have just been coasting through this if you know what I
Mean. I have awful intrusive thoughts and I'm convinced I'm a peadophile! I keep googling trying to understand what makes someone like this. I'm laying in bed crying because I'm scared I am one!
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frogface
Private Board (R) Member
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Post by frogface on Jul 2, 2017 13:39:24 GMT
That is so common Kirsty - firstly, if you were actually a paedophile you'd be too busy engaging in actual sexual behaviour with your kids - and I don't mean patting their cute wee bum or giving them a bath and thinking how perfect they are. You certainly wouldn't be worrying about it or crying about it. Be really clear about the difference between loving our children physically and sexual gratification (paedophilia). Sorry if that is too graphic but you need to know you're not the evil person you think you are. If there is an actual behaviour you are concerned with, why not take a leap and post it and see what others think?
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frogface
Private Board (R) Member
Posts: 938
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Post by frogface on Jul 3, 2017 6:57:09 GMT
How are you today Kirsty?
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I suppose your old life will always be a part of you. But remember no one is the same after having kids. Hopefully you will find a part of the current "you" that you can be proud of, your strength, your love for Sophia, the positive things you never knew before. I know how miserable and hard it is but people's lives are not static and neither are you, we are always changing and growing. You're just on an up-hill at the moment but it won't be like this forever. Keep telling yourself that, keep searching for the positives and congratulate yourself on every milestone. 
