relapse

[0132sarah]

hi has anyone else had a relapse?

my lo is six now, i have relapsed straight back. anyone else experienced this? so lethargic, just want to sleep all the time. waiting on meds from docs. got no family to help me, my hair so matted, not been out house for a month now.

[0132sarah]

Hi all, I apologise for my post yesterday being very brief, ive not been i n a good place recently. I had pni for 3 years with the birth of my lo. back then when i was in the midst of it, i got great support, eventually after finding the right doctor that was really there for me. i also received the right support. care coordinator, cpn, health visitors the lot. Its just my and my child. I dont have any other family. i started college, while i was getting better, i admit i really struggled in the first year. got diagnosed with pmdd, hot flushes, which then triggers the panic attacks. my anxiety was always at a peak. i can happily say i managed three years and got a first in my degree. it wore me out, but felt so good that i had done something for myself.

i should mention, when i was getting better, i was adamant about coming off my meds. i felt i didnt need them. and to be honest i didnt need them. until winter, winter blues. bought a SAD light. but i now wish i had never come off the antidepressants. ive met other women with pni and they have accepted that they will be on their meds, ie, antidepressants for good.

theres been a few incidents recently that has triggered off the relapse, to the point of me being exhausted, i cannot sleep enough. i literally had t oscream for help, apart from my gp, which i have always been able to speak to, she referred me for help. now my child is 6 its harder to get support. i got my antidepressants yesterday, the same ones when i had pni, i remember not being able to stay awake then, and these meds helped with that. they arrived in the afternoon, but took one immediately. i ended up being awake most of the night. they really worked. before then i was having to drink crazy amounts of coffee to stay awake, which didnt even give me palpitations or a panic attack like it usually does. i done this so i could look after my child. just taken one this morning, so waiting for it to work.

i just want to reassure all before i finish posting, not everyone relapses, and if you do, you recognise it, and i haven't reached the darkest, darkest place, its the feeling of falling to there, it is scary. but reaching out for help and recognising if anyone does relapse. please dont think it happens to us all. i was hoping to find someone who'd been in a similar situation to myself on here.

[monica]

Welcome back but equally sorry you're not in a good place atm. You will get better and as rubbish as you feel you've been worse yet achieved so much. I'm really proud of you. I know you didn't have any support so did the whole recovery in your own.

It can take a bit of time for meds to kick in so don't even though one tab (or was it the meds?) gave you a bad night once they kick in hopefully it'll help you sleep.

Sometimes in life the pressures just get too much . I've been in some dark places due to life events. You'll work through this. Do come back for support X

[0132sarah]

thank you, yes its when you know you can feel it coming. asking for help but none was given. its only now, its all in place. thankfully a friend has taken my child out for the day, its half term. neighbour gone shop for me and got a cleaner coming too. its the little things like these that help. yes the meds will take time, looking forward to the day they settle and work as they did before.
it was also the guilt of not being able to do everything with my child. before my lo was a newborn and slept when i did, but now is being a normal six year old. finally getting the help needed. i know ive been through the worst of this years ago, so know i can beat this without a doubt. its just time, patience, support and a odd rant. thank you xx

[monica]

How have the last few days been? Please offload on here whenever you feel the need to. Even though you know the theory and have put things in place to help yourself there are times when the feelings are quite overwhelming. There will be good times ahead!

Also if you want to talk about the triggers which have led to this relapse feel free to do so (no pressure of you don't want to though )x

[monica]

How are you? How are you feeling on the meds? X

[monica]

Hi hope life has improved for you. Will look out for you if you want to chat on here x