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Post by Veritee on Feb 29, 2004 18:19:11 GMT
Hi Again I have just read what Deborah said about you not needing to have this medical if you have PND. Please check this out if it is not to late but according to the info I have this is not the case. I would love it if I am wrong as attending such an inflexible test of ability to work is very distressing when you have PNI/D. The all work test or the PCA is a very cruel test designed to get people of the incapacity register and I am not alone in thinking this see: www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/benefits/unspun/incapacity_pilot_areas.htmI thought the position was it is routine for everyone on incapacity to be called for PCAs and they make no exceptions unless you are an inpatient in which case you are not eligible for incapacity anyway over a few weeks. Anyway I know several women with PND I am supporting who have recently had to go to a PCA and I had to have one recently myself( September -obviously not for PNI but because I had an accident in April which left me disabled) Even though I am unable to walk without crutches and then not far and unable to stand or even sit for any period long enough to allow me to do a job - I still had to go to a PCA and prove I was unfit for any job! Anyway it is a very unfair test in that it makes no allowances for individual circumstances and it consists of the doctor going through a standard set of questions for which she/he can not deviate and awarding you points according to your reply. Even a consultants or doctors letter has no influence at this stage it is all on how many points this doctor awards you at this interview( Please read the guides at www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/benefits/guides/IB/ib_introduction.htm)However if you pass the all work test as fit for work ( bear in mind this means all work not the job you normally do - so if you can not do your normal stressful job with people say but they feel you could take on a menial job like cleaning etc, you will pass fit for work) There is hope because you can appeal and when you appeal there is more flexibility about being awarded further incapacity and then they can take into consideration a doctors letter etc. It is very common to have to appeal before you get it extended but it is worth the appeal as you will then get it for a couple of years without having to get any further medicals etc. Anyway this is what I thought the position to be and I have both been through the test twice ( once for PND) and supported others who have had to do the test. As many with PNI may have to have this medical I am considering doing a page on my site for this and other benefit issues What do others think Veritee
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Post by AC on Feb 29, 2004 18:58:30 GMT
Thanks Veritee,
I am worried sick about this medical.It is on friday.I almost wish it was tomorrow,so i could get it out of the way.
Im not sure if it has helped to hear what will be involved or if it has added to my worries,But i suppose at least i know what to expect now.I know that i am not being singled out on this but i just feel let down by the system especially as i have never claimed any kind of benefit before and i dont like the way i am being made to feel as if i dont deserve it.
I probably would have tried to put on a bit of a front,and make myself more capable than what i am if i hadnt of read your message.I try to act normal around people even though inside i want to scream.I guess on Friday i must not be proud and be totally honest about my mental state of health.
I think a page on your site about Benefits,Medicals etc would be very helpfull,i know it would have been great for me to have had a few weeks ago.
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Post by Veritee on Mar 1, 2004 9:35:28 GMT
Dear AC
You are right I should have replied to your thread when you first mentioned the medical. You are right to be annoyed. I did not as I have a general policy not to intervene in this forum as I set it up for people currently with PNI/D to support each other. I do reply sometimes when an issue affects me personally, but this is when I can not help myself and I try not to.
It was only when I realized that the responses you were getting from others may be misleading and may add you to making the mistake of going to the interview and 'putting a brave face on it'.
(Which is what so many do and I believe what they hope many do as less then pass. In mine and others experience the doctor you see will in fact encourage you to minimize your difficulties - so you HAVE to tell it as it is at your worse, cry if you feel like it, Which is not hard as the whole thing is upsetting, let them know how bad it is) I am so sorry I had to make you feel worse. I knew what I had to say would not make you feel any better but I felt I had to make the decision about weather I replied at all and if I did I would have to tell it how it was as I do not think it would do you any favors just to play down the situation and allay your fears.
At least now you know what to expect and that there is nothing personal in it - everyone on incapacity goes through this - you even have to suffer the indignity of something similar if you are disabled, I am now classified as permanently disabled from my accident and I have a similar medical coming up for Disability Living Allowance. I have already been to one.
You must take someone for support and the best person would be your CPN or another professional who knows you. Failing that whoever you feel would be the most helpful. Dear AC
You are right I should have replied to your thread when you first mentioned the medical. You are right to be annoyed. I did not as I have a general policy not to intervene in this forum as I set it up for people currently with PNI/D to support each other. I do reply sometimes when an issue affects me personally, but this is when I can not help myself and I try not to.
It was only when I realized that the responses you were getting from others may be misleading and may add you to making the mistake of going to the interview and 'putting a brave face on it'.
(Which is what so many do and I believe what they hope many do as less then pass. In mine and others experience the doctor you see will in fact encourage you to minimize your difficulties - so you HAVE to tell it as it is at your worse, cry if you feel like it, Which is not hard as the whole thing is upsetting, let them know how bad it is) I am so sorry I had to make you feel worse. I knew what I had to say would not make you feel any better but I felt I had to make the decision about weather I replied at all and if I did I would have to tell it how it was as I do not think it would do you any favors just to play down the situation and allay your fears.
At least now you know what to expect and that there is nothing personal in it - everyone on incapacity goes through this - you even have to suffer the indignity of something similar if you are disabled, I am now classified as permanently disabled, not incapacitated, from my accident and I have a similar medical coming up for Disability Living Allowance. I have already been to one.
You must take someone for support and the best person would be your CPN or another professional who knows you. Failing that whoever you feel would be the most helpful.
I am sure even at this late stage your CPN will try to go with you as they will realize how difficult this will be for you and important. Have you still not told your partner? Could he not support you?
I understand about being let down by the state when you said " as i have never claimed any kind of benefit before and i dont like the way i am being made to feel as if i dont deserve it." But they reallydo not care if you have claimed before or not. Whatever way, you get treated exactly the same and the system does not care how its proceedures will affect an individual or make them suffer. I have a good friend suffering a severe mental illness( not PNI related) and she can cope with no stress at all but she has the same kind of medical next week for DLA. She is taking her CPN and me with her, but she will be very upset and the system does not care at all.
I felt like you when I first had to go through this. I was then 40 years old and until PND had never claimed anything and had worked since I was 15 years old when I left school. I was then only on incapacity for about 2 months with PND and then I went back to work as a youth worker, and over the years I had advised many on benefits as a youth worked and had done much training on the issue - but still while claiming I felt so ashamed even though I had worked for over 25 years without a break.
Now 11 years on at 51 years old I find myself again having to go through these humiliating experiences as I have become disabled. But now my attitude is different. It no longer knocks my self esteem. I have paid now nearly 30 years of stamps and it is the system that is wrong not me, as I did not want to have my accident just as you did not want to get PNI/D
Please let me know if you are alright? I felt very bad having to spell out the incapacity benefit system as I knew it would not help you on the short term - but I had to make the decision as I think it would have been shattering to have got to the medical so unprepaired and realising your misunderstanding afterwards. For any one else out there with benefit issues make sure you get the leaflets from the benefits agancy explaining the ins and out of your benefit. They will post them to you and if you read them thoughly they do tell you want you are to expect and use the net to get further information.
With best intentions
Veritee
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Post by AC on Mar 1, 2004 11:34:24 GMT
I have just been looking at the letter for this medical and it is tomorrow ! Help..feel sick,I dont know why i thought it was Friday. It is at 10:30am,Im pretty sure now that my Cpn wont be able to go with me at such short notice. My son is not well today,he has a rotten cold and a bad cough,he has a doctors appointment in 20 minutes,im supposed to be going to my group today at 1pm.Not sure if i should put my son in the creche as i dont want him to pass it on to all the other children.Havent got a babysitter,so i guess i will have to miss the group.Feel awful,stressed abd very panicky. Veritee,please dont think that i was annoyed with you about briefing me on what to expect at this medical,im really glad you did,as i know i would have come across as being fine,when i know im not. Help,feel really sick,my heart is pounding.
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Post by Veritee on Mar 1, 2004 12:02:03 GMT
Dear AC
Oh dear. I am sorry I know you are not angry with me personally I just meant you would be right to be annoyed I did not give you the info sooner.
Does your partner know what is going on? You must get support for this or at least a good friend to come to your house to look after your baby so you do not have to take the baby too.
On the positive side - and there is a positive side - this is a standard test and if you do what I said answer all the questions as if at your worse. Include such answers as you need support constantly in the house and to go out shopping etc - say you can not go to the supermarket on your own. can not drive without company, walk far or go on public transport, need support through out the day and can not cope with being alone, have difficultiy sleeping, have panic attacks, neglect your own care etc. All this sounds extreme but actually not lies for most with PNI at their worse and these are the sorts of questions you will be asked. They make no exceptins for variatins of capability or mood so you can not either
The positive side is that if you get through this you will get your incapacity for about 2 years no more questions asked and hopefully by that time you will be well again.
You just have to get through tomorrow and actually the awlful thing is the least well you cope with this. the more distressed you are, the more likely you are to get through and get your benefit! - thats why I called it a cruel medical. I have to go out now until about 4.30 but I will check on you later
Love Veritee
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Post by AC on Mar 1, 2004 14:26:23 GMT
The day is not getting better. I took my son to the doctors,he listened to his chest and said that basically his cold has gone to his chest which has given him the cough,he didnt prescribe anything,so i guess i will have to continue with the Calpol. He fell asleep in the car on the way home from the doctors,(about 2 miles away.) My sister in law had offered to leave work early to look after him so i could still go to the group,However once he fell asleep,i didnt want to wake him as i knew he would be miserable and felt that a nap would do him good. So...I havent gone to the group,feel very guilty for not going,but most of all feel mad with myself for not asking for help earlier from my CPN,about this stupid medical.I rang her to tell her that i wouldnt be at the group and yet i couldnt face telling her about tomorrow,i feel sure she wouldnt be able to make it anyway. Im sorry if i sound like i am making such a big deal about this medical,i know to everyone its probably something so little.But to me,i feel like i am going to be doing something massive tomorrow,i am absolutely dreading it BIG TIME ! My partner still doesnt know about the medical.I dont know why,I still try to be normal around him,which is so stupid i know. I find it quite difficult to exagerrate a situation and always have done,and i an dreading having to do that tomorrow.Somedays i dont want to go out,somedays i dont want to get up let alone get dressed,however i do..and i try my best to look presentable in the day,even if inside i feel horrible.I feel as if they will be waiting to catch me out tomorrow,Help ! Im so frightened.
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TinaC
New Member
I am 43 first time mum with a baby 13 months. I am trying to survive PND
Posts: 15
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Post by TinaC on Mar 1, 2004 19:39:32 GMT
Alison, You will be fine, take a deep breath and remember, this time tomorrow it will all be behind you. I know you can do it, I believe in you. Please tell your partner, you don't have to face this alone. Tomorrow be true to yourself, tell them about the bad days, don't be proud be honest. You have no reason to feel guilty about this illness. You are ill, you are not trying to pull a fast one. No one that knows you would ever think that. I wish you all the luck for tomorrow and my toughts will be with you. Take care. Luv Tina XXX
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Post by Elaine on Mar 1, 2004 21:59:26 GMT
Hi Alison
Don't be frightened tomorrow. Think back to when you first started posting here and how much you have achieved. You didn't believe you could do any of the things you have done. You are a real fighter and have been so determined. Remember that!
I so feel for you Alison - it must be a daunting thought, but you have nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to hide. You have suffered enough and tomorrow you must be honest - you owe to it yourself for everything you have been through. Why should you feel guilty about being ill.
Tell your other half about the medical, you shouldn't have to cope with this alone!
I will be thinking of you tomorrow - everything will be fine. Let us know how it goes.
God bless honey.
Elaine xx
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Post by Veritee on Mar 1, 2004 22:17:15 GMT
Dear Alison
I have only just been able to get back online but I have read the other replies and I agree. Take a deep breath and just get this over with. They are not trying to catch you out - it is just routine to the doctor and other staff and you probably will never see them again.
So ditch your pride and tell it how it is. I know that you cope and you do get up and care for yourself, your child and your husband. But you are still ill and need this benefit.
It is just that the medical is a general one which does not match PNI very well. Because with PNI we often look from the outside like you are coping very well - the smiling illness - but it is how you are feeling inside. Answer the questions as to how you feel inside.
Also if you really feel you can not face it by yourself tomorrow and if you think if you had a couple of weeks more to organize it you could get the CPN to come with you. You could ring in sick tomorrow and re schedule. You can do this once or twice without losing your benefit. I had to put a medical off once due to illness and they re made the appointment for a couple of weeks time.
It would probably be better just to get it over with now - but you do have this option if you have to.
Good luck either way for tomorrow
Love Veritee
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Post by AC on Mar 2, 2004 14:01:57 GMT
I have just got back from the medical.Al my fears and anxietys were justified..It was horrible. I got there about 10 minutes before my appointment,to be told by the receptionist that the doctor was running a little late.However What i didnt expect was to be sitting there in the waiting room for over an hour before being seen. You can imagine how i was feeling,my heart was pounding,i had sweaty palms and there was a man in there trying to hold a conversation with me and i didnt have a clue what he was saying,So i was answering him by saying Yes ! I just hope i was saying yes in the right places ! The doctor was quite ecentric,and i guess was being quite fair,however i was very nervous and aggitated and i think he could sense it. Veritee,i cant thankyou enough for letting me know what to expect,you were exactly right and he asked all the questions that were stated in the guides that you attached to your message.So Thankyou,at least i had some background on what he was going to ask. Although i am so relieved the medical is over,i still have the 3 week wait to find out if i am going to continue getting the benefit.That in itself is yet another worry. Thanks for eveyones support over this,especially my group friends.You have all been wonderful.
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Caroline
Full member
mother of 16 months old son, 7 months pregnant
Posts: 102
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Post by Caroline on Mar 2, 2004 17:21:41 GMT
Hi Alison, I had crossed my fingers for you and thought of you today very much. As Veriteé had pointed out since it is such a cruel test (I don't know what similar tests we have here in Germany, but I'm sure there are some) maybe in a paradoxical and cynical way it was "good" that you felt so nervous and aggrevated- hopefully you convinced them. It was so brave of you to go and not to cancel the date! Well done! Now it's over and I wish that you get the benefit ! All the best, Caroline
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Caroline
Full member
mother of 16 months old son, 7 months pregnant
Posts: 102
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Post by Caroline on Mar 2, 2004 17:24:49 GMT
Hi Alison, sorry, I meant "agitated" not "aggrevated"- language problems...
XXXCaroline
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Post by Tina on Mar 2, 2004 18:02:29 GMT
Hi Alison,
I am so pleased it's over. Well done for going, I couldn't have made it. I thought about you all morning hoping that it would go alright. It's behind you now and you have moved forward. Must go J poorly and crying down stairs. I think he needs a cuddle. Don't expect I will make tomorrow not unless he improves overnight I will give you a ring.
Just had a scared he has opened the gate at the bottom of the stairs and climbed to find me, all on his own. Better go, quickly.
Take care.
Tina
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Post by Veritee on Mar 2, 2004 19:32:37 GMT
Dear Alison You got through it - brave woman.
Yes it is horrible. This was my dilemma, and why it took me so long to post the information. I had to tell the truth but I did not want to add to you anxiety. The times I have had this test the doctor -I live in Cornwall so it is held in Truro maybe we got the same doctor?- has always ran late and I have had lots of time to build up to a panic, and yes both the doctors I have seen have been what I would call 'odd?'
Basically without being unkind to these doctors - you do not get a job with the benefit office doing these assessments if you have a good career with the health service - I will let you draw your own conclusions but I will just say that one of my doctors seemed like he needed some help also.
It is a horrible experience for anyone, but you have got it over with and actually as Caroline said the fact you were 'not at your best' will actually make it more likely you will continue on your benefit which you do need at this time.
Let me know if you get it
All the best
Veritee
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Post by AC on Mar 2, 2004 19:36:21 GMT
I know i dont know a lot of you,but you have become such great friends,and those that i do know i am very lucky to be able to call you friends. I still keep thinking about today,going over and over in my head what he asked and the replies i gave,and wondering if i answered them the way i should have,i guess this will go on for the next 3 weeks ! Tina,sorry to hear J isnt well,Would be really good to see you tomorrow,even if it is only for a short while.My son isnt well still,but i am going to try and make it,i could do with seeing a few friendly faces tomorrow,even if its just to have a chat !
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