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Post by rocker on Aug 9, 2008 20:21:07 GMT
things aren't too bad today but then we've mostly been doing seperate things lol but seriously though, I suppose the old saying of a good nights sleep sorting everything definitely helped last night
unfortunately me asking her about her tablets won't have much effect because almost every day I end up saying to her if she would take her tablets it would help me cope better because she wouldn't be so aggressive I wouldn't retaliate and the whole circle wouldn't kick off again!
the hassle I used to get whenever I reminded her about her tablet isn't worth it, she did once ask me to give her them every day but then after about 2 weeks the abuse started, how she wasn't a child, get off my back I'll take them later when I feel like it etc etc.........unfortunately a "top up" isn't going to work because they aren't actually in her system, its been roughly 6 months since she took them for a prolonged period, she's never actually given them a chance to absorb into her system properly I think only once did she ever manage it for more than 6 weeks, then it goes off the rails for months then she trys again, a week or two then off the rails............
thanks for the good wishes, all packed and ready to go I tired the wee man out today so he was in bed before 7, a world record these days lol!
feeling positive today, she's been on the legoland website and seems to be enthused about it so fingers crossed, here we go!...................
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Post by monica on Aug 10, 2008 15:06:49 GMT
Hi
have a fab time - hoep your wife enjoys herself and ofcourse you and your son, too.
Monica
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Post by rocker on Aug 14, 2008 11:01:02 GMT
thanks Monica, we had a brilliant time and the change of scene definitely did some good............see how long it continues lol!!.........our wee man loved Legoland, its always good to watch him getting a buzz out of everything helped us both I think
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Post by winegirl on Aug 14, 2008 14:34:39 GMT
Hi Rocker
That is sooo great!! I am glad you had a fab time! We were the the same time as you and loved it too (not the ques though...)
I think the change of scenery was a good idea, and you should be pleased with yourself for having sich a positive effect on yoru wife x
Take Care
WG xx
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Post by rocker on Aug 15, 2008 10:54:22 GMT
thanks WG, I think next time it will be when schools are in, the queues were huge lol!
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Post by winegirl on Aug 15, 2008 14:02:50 GMT
Yeah, I only found out as we were leaving that we could have paid for a Q-Robot that virtually ques for you so you get a time on each ride and just walk on. Grrrr. Oh well, know for next time.
Hows things going at home now you are back?
WG x
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Post by rocker on Aug 18, 2008 10:33:14 GMT
its been a little better, she still obssesses over stupid little things, and continually repeating the same "demands" for me to do like phoning texting and emailing me the same shopping list within an hour while I'm in work and unable to actually go to the shops............but its a bit more bareable!
qbots - £10 a person in your group - I let that one go this time lol!! but having seen people stroll past us after queing for an hour its a must for next time lol!!
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Post by winegirl on Aug 18, 2008 12:31:18 GMT
Hi
Certainly sounds like the trip has done her a bit of good. Perhaps you could persuade her to have a day out with you and LO at farm park or something soon, a bit of fun day with her family sounds like it could be a good therapy??
WG x
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Post by rocker on Aug 18, 2008 14:53:15 GMT
we actually do try and do stuff like that at least every other weekend, my main thought on a Wednesday is "right where can we take LO this weekend", whether its a park, farm, swimmers, soft play etc, the idea is its the weekend we're going somewhere lol! I think the biggest help was being away from the house for days, complete change of scene.
as I'm sure you well know, it seems to come in waves so the few good days are bound to get switched around again, so I guess I'll just enjoy the calm before the next storm lol!! at least having a good couple of days away and some calmer moods since then helps me to cope with her better...................
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Post by winegirl on Aug 18, 2008 15:04:39 GMT
We will be here and listening if that storm comes pal.
WG x
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Post by sianyc on Sept 4, 2008 15:25:16 GMT
Hi rocker
Just wondering how you're doing.
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Post by rocker on Sept 5, 2008 10:42:09 GMT
hmmm so so, nothings changed, suggested us going away without LO for a night or two but thats been shot down. The biggest annoyance for me at the minute is the constant "will you do this or this or this" without her actually doing much, that actually seems to be our main conversation at present, or at least hers with me, "orders" to do stuff, no interest if I want to talk about the problem, or anything else. She is just completely negative about everything and its really getting me down at the minute, all take and no give.............
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Post by winegirl on Sept 5, 2008 11:44:29 GMT
Next time she is sat down and asks you to do somethingk, you should just say `yes of course, and can you do..... (such and such) for me?'. Maybe that way she may start to understand the give and take??
Still here and thinking of you x
WG xx
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Post by rocker on Sept 5, 2008 12:34:40 GMT
WG if only it were that simple! I've tried that but it just gets shot down, unfortunately the other side of it is more prevalent, if she does anything she thinks I then have to do something to match it, its almost like a childish game of "its your turn not mine".................at one point if she ironed I had to put the ironing board and iron away!!!!!!!
actually what you suggested does get her to be quiet but it doesn't get us any further on, I've told her theres things she wants done I'm not doing until she does certain things that need done, conversation ends and it doesn't get mentioned again until she is back into ordering mode
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Post by winegirl on Sept 5, 2008 13:05:21 GMT
Oh mate you are doing so well to deal with all this - I know I couldnt. I do think though that perhaps she needs to know that you wont put up with this forever..
It is right that she should get extra support while she is ill, but not a god damn gofer! You are doing everything you can here and she needs to be very gently reminded of this.
WG x
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