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Post by silverhalo on Feb 26, 2007 22:15:40 GMT
Hi i dont know where to start but my wife took her own life a couple of weeks ago and im at a loss as to how to cope,i registered on this site a couple of years ago after the birth of my our new son when my wife was diagnosed with PND but i cannot recall my old username but i had posted about her condition. I feel so empty so alone so sad and helpless she was my life
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Post by clairecharlie on Feb 26, 2007 22:20:14 GMT
Hi silverhalo I'M SO SORRY ABOUT YOUR LOSS. This illness is so nasty n so real n affects everyone aronud us not just the sufferer is u well know!!!! i really don't no what else to say but i'm here if you want 2 talk. love Claire x x
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Post by silverhalo on Feb 26, 2007 22:23:51 GMT
Thanks as im struggling to come to terms with what has happened im also left with a 14 year old daughter and a nearly 3 year old son i dont know what to do next and my mind is running riot with all sorts of things
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Post by jmontan27 on Feb 26, 2007 22:24:03 GMT
Siverhalo, I was so very sad to read your message and cannot begin to imagine what you must be going through at the moment. Do you have anyone who can be with you or share your feelings with at the moment?
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Post by yoyo on Feb 26, 2007 22:26:15 GMT
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Post by helenr on Feb 26, 2007 22:26:42 GMT
Hi silverhalo,
I am so, so, sorry for your loss, am in tears at the minute.
How are you managing with your son? How old is he now?
I'm sorry for the questions, i just want to give you a starting point to talk - if you want to. I'll be online for a goodwhile yet, and if you don't want to post now, someone will always answer you!
Am sending you and your son a virtual hug at the minute.
love and hugs helen x.
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Post by helenr on Feb 26, 2007 22:27:54 GMT
Hi jmontan27 and yoyo - our posts crossed!
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Post by clairecharlie on Feb 26, 2007 22:28:37 GMT
This is still very early days 4 you all!!!! n it's going 2 be awful 4 you 4 a long time yet. do you hav support from family friends etc. how are your children coping it's a very difficult age 4 your eldest. and i guess even harder 4 you tryin 2 hold it all 2gether? love Claire x
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Post by silverhalo on Feb 26, 2007 22:34:25 GMT
Hi silverhalo, I am so, so, sorry for your loss, am in tears at the minute. How are you managing with your son? How old is he now? I'm sorry for the questions, i just want to give you a starting point to talk - if you want to. I'll be online for a goodwhile yet, and if you don't want to post now, someone will always answer you! Am sending you and your son a virtual hug at the minute. love and hugs helen x. My son will be 3 on st patricks day and realy doesnt know whats happening as for myself i realy cant see alight at the end of the tunnel,my wife was only 36 and i cant see anything ahead of me but i know i have to be there for my kids i just dont know what to do as my family are also struggling to comfort me as they have no expierince of this either
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Post by helenr on Feb 26, 2007 22:38:06 GMT
Hi silverhalo,
things are too raw for you just now, although its difficult try not to think too far ahead.
Have you spoken to your gp/hv, are they able to point you in the direction of support?
Have also pm'd you
Love and hugs x.
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Post by clairecharlie on Feb 26, 2007 22:43:56 GMT
Forgive me 4 stating the obvious but you all need time 2 grieve. that includes the extended family. when every one is affected it is very difficult 2 offer comfort 2 each other. what about aclose friend ? i no men find it hard 2 talk feelins 2 other men but what about a friend of your wife? or health visitor? or a berevement group? love Claire x
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Post by silverhalo on Feb 26, 2007 22:51:55 GMT
Forgive me 4 stating the obvious but you all need time 2 grieve. that includes the extended family. when every one is affected it is very difficult 2 offer comfort 2 each other. what about aclose friend ? i no men find it hard 2 talk feelins 2 other men but what about a friend of your wife? or health visitor? or a berevement group? love Claire x i have a meeting with a group called PETAL tomorrow who deal with families of suicide and murder victims i do know we all need time to griev but its the trying to understand why she done it in the first place and why i didnt pick up the warning signs when they wer probably very obvious to see
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Post by cheshire on Feb 26, 2007 22:54:37 GMT
Hello Silverhalo,
I am so upset to read your post tonight. I am, to be honest, in tears and quite distressed - but I cannot imagine though for a minute what you must be going through..
But we are so here for you, you know.
If you would like to speak to any of us/ PM/ speak to my husband even (he sometimes posts here) that is fine.
Keep talking, please.
I am so sorry. Hopefulxxx
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Post by yoyo on Feb 26, 2007 22:55:55 GMT
You will have many many questions and I'm afraid not so many answers to some of them. PNI is a very very very complex illness and causes a person to be very irrational and also very insecure and scared. You are not to blame, you didn't cause any of it, your wife was very very ill and I imagine hid just how bad she was feeling from those closest to her.
I hope you can find the PETAL useful and in some way comforting x x
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Post by clairecharlie on Feb 26, 2007 23:00:27 GMT
I've had awful suicidal thoughts with this pni. one night inparticular they were very bad. but instead of wakin my partner who was asleep upstairs i phoned the samaritans who were useless!! n then my sister instead of botherin him!!! he hadn't got a clue as 2 how bad things had got 4 me hadn't seen the signs as you say!! We r all fantastic at hiding them 2 protect others so don't blame yr self 4 that!!! love Claire x
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