Syn
New Member
I have a 6month old daughter and can`t imagine anything worse than having another child!
Posts: 20
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Post by Syn on Oct 8, 2007 8:28:56 GMT
Thanks ladies but not been a very good weekend My parnter almost took her away to his mums TWICE this weekend because I lost it. First on Friday night because all I had all day was was the usual crying, not colic crying but whinging and I had, had enough and screamed at her and he wouldn`t let me near her which I don`t blame him for because I shouldn`t of done it and said he was taking her to his mums but I said he wasn`t so he stayed. The second time was last night. She was up alot on saturday night and we barely had any sleep, maybe 4 hours so we was irritable (she is playing up on night times now when that was the only time we used to escape the crying) and she started crying literally every 10 mins and he lost it and started kicking things about and something hit me so I lost it and told him to stay away from us. Sorted that out and decided to take her and the dog to the beach, she was a little bit whingey but not too bad. Once we got her home she just carried on crying every 10mins, I couldn`t do anything. He was holding her and helping every so often but was more concerned about playing on poker and going on the internet. So bearing in mind its me that has to sort her out all the time, get up in the night and so on I was pretty fed up. She had been crying for about an hour and just wouldn`t shut up so I screamed at him to get her away from me so he rang up his mums to go there and started packing her so stuff. He then said to me I wont be coming back, only to get my stuff. Im my head I didn`t care I was glad but then I though well how am I going to look if I never see my child our he doesn`t let my family see her and they would disown me and so on. He wouldn`t look after her anyway it would be his mum and she can`t do it all the time anyway because she`s a manager of a factory, his stepdad gets up at 4am she`s at work for 5am and my partner is at work for 4-5am so no one could look after her so I told him this so he stayed but im my head I wish he had gone and took her. Had about 5 hours sleep so im really tired again which doesn`t help my patience. Going to the doctor this week because I really think something is happening to me because my hair has started falling out im getting the shakes, headaches and feel really sick all the time. Syn xxxxxx Syn xxxxx
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Post by winegirl on Oct 8, 2007 9:58:07 GMT
Hi Hun
I am so sorry for the traumatic weekend you have had. I would def get yourself back to the doctors, possibly the stress of it all is making you poorly?
I am glad that your OH decided not to tak baby away. Its gonna be a tough time but things will get easier with her and you will be so grateful that she stayed at home with you guys.
My little one screamed none stop for the first six months of her life. But now she is such a good girl who only really crys when she is over tired. Can you find out if you are in a sure start area to receive some support during the day? If you ask your hv she should be able to help you with that.
I really hope today is better for you, and i will be around on and off all day if you feel the need to chat.
Thinking of you x
Winegirl x
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Post by Scarlet on Oct 8, 2007 10:20:22 GMT
Syn,
So sorry you had a crap weekend hun. Irritability can most definitely be one of the symptoms of PNI, and lack of sleep contributes to it greatly.
Also lack of sleep does put strain on relationships, but I'm sure when things settle down with your daughters colic, and you both get a good nights sleep...this will be a turning point for you. She'll be on solids soon won't she.
Glad to hear that your OH didn't take your daughter to his mothers, bloody hell this illness can mess with your emotions enough as it is. I wish sometimes that our OHs could actually feel what we are feeling, so they could be more understanding...but perhaps that wouldn't be such a good idea..
Keep strong hun, and know we are here for you.
Hugs
Scarlet X
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Post by Scarlet on Oct 8, 2007 12:14:13 GMT
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Post by winegirl on Oct 8, 2007 13:17:51 GMT
Me too. Forunately I have thick hair but 17 months on it is still coming out in chunks! My hairdresser says she sees this all the time with women who have had babies.
x
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Post by monica on Oct 8, 2007 18:06:08 GMT
Hi Syn
Sorry about your weekend. You and your oh are going through such a diffiuclt time with babe's crying. Together with sleep deprivation (which incidently is a choice tool for torture methods), it would drive the most sane of people up the wall. It sounds as if you and your oh are coping with this differently, which also causes friction.
Can you get someone to look after babe regularly for a few hours just so you can get a break from the crying and get some me time in? I knwo this isn't possible for everyone but a breather on a regular basis would hopefully perk you up. Sorry if I have missed this, but have you asked to get your baby referred to a paediatrician; maybe they can do something. Also a friend of mine whohad twins with bad colic managed to get herkids a nursery placement when they were babies and this was done thru her hv as she was finding it exteremly hard to cope. Again, this might not feel right for you, but perhaps your hv has ideas on how to help.
My nephew had horrendous colic as a babe and reflux, too. This only started imrpoving when he went onto solids so I'm sure it will improve - please try adnhold onto that thought.
How have you been this pm?
Monica
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Syn
New Member
I have a 6month old daughter and can`t imagine anything worse than having another child!
Posts: 20
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Post by Syn on Oct 9, 2007 17:30:15 GMT
Parnter took me to the doctors this evening and ive been prescribed Fluxotine 20mg, I totally broke down. My partner was abit upset that I didn`t tell him that I constantly thought about killing myself at least he knows how low I feel. Had an hours sleep last night thanks to this flu or whatever I have and having to feed baby in the night, so Im barely awake. Luckily there is a football match on tonight and he has gone to his mums to watch and taken baby so I get this evening to myself. Im so glad that my hair loss is normal, my hair is thin enough without losing anymore. Baby is 14weeks this weeks, going to hold on a couple more weeks then try her on some baby porridge or rice or something like that once a day to see if it makes a difference. At least ive been to the doctors and hopefully after a few weeks these tablets will work. Syn xxxxx
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Post by winegirl on Oct 9, 2007 19:23:47 GMT
Hi Syn
Hope the fluoxetine works for you hun! Make sure you give it a good few weeks before you see any benefits. It is great that you have got a bit of a break tonight. Put your feet up and put some cack on the telly and chill out. You deserve it!
Keep us updated with how you get on with the meds hun. Will be thinking of you x
Winegirl x
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Post by sunflower2007 on Oct 9, 2007 21:21:02 GMT
Hi Syn My hair was coming out in clumps while I was breastfeeding and it was so distressing. But it is starting to grow back!
Thinking of you and sending you positive thoughts
Sunflower x
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Syn
New Member
I have a 6month old daughter and can`t imagine anything worse than having another child!
Posts: 20
|
Post by Syn on Oct 10, 2007 8:35:55 GMT
Last night was a CRACK! Enjoying my lovely night off, partner sending me supportive texts. My email wasn`t working so I went to use my oH`s he had loads of automated msgs from the site facebook and the where saying he had msgs from this girl who I knew from school and he used to go out with her about a year before me. Not that im judgemental on looks but shes really ugly and distgusting and I was like ok they are just chatting which is fine I don`t mind that but there was quite a few so i thought id txt him for his password so i could log in as he has my friend on there who im meeting today and she was online and i wanted to ask her what time she was coming round. Strange no reply he usually txts back within 10secs so i sent another, still no reply so i rang him, voicemail. He knew that id sussed him out and had something to hide so i managed to change his password so i could get into his facebook account. Low and behold there were loads of msgs to each other just general chit chat, scrolling down I come across a apart where they dern`t ask each other something, scroll down further he asks if she can remember them having sex, why the f**k would he ask that? He has a new family and he asks something like that bearing in mind shes married now. Then they exchange mobile numbers and find out they`ve been texting each other. WTF? By this time im rining his mum and him trying to get hold of him and they ignore their fones. Then he rings me and im screaming at him to bring her back now or il kill him, really screaming abuse. He said he would bring her straight away. Whilst he is on the way home his mum rings me saying he`s really upset and whats happened so i explain and she tries to convince me not to do anything to hasty and that she would be annoyed too but we have to think about the house and baby. BUT hes done this before on the internet so I don`t give third chances. He gets home and puts baby upstairs and by then ive chucked his clothes outside. I tell him to explain himself he says he ws messing about when he asked her that. F**king hilarious i totally see the joke in it. I ask has he been txting her and he says yeh but only stuff like what you up? Why would he need to know that, why does he need her number and no others girls numbers for general chit chat. So whilst im downstairs looking after OUR baby he`s been txting her and chatting away to her. I told him to get the f**k out and that he makes me feel sick. He treid to say sorry but i wasn`t interested he`s done it before and he`s done it again. He said he wish he had slept with someone and made it worth his while i said i wish he had then i could of kicked the s**t out of him. So he`s coming for the rest of his stuff tonight and we are putting the house on the market this week because i cant afford to keep it on my own. Now i have to think about my dog and cat which might have to be rehomed which makes me hate him even more. He had just thrown away everything for the sake of a stupid msg and a stupid site. Syn xxxxxx
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Syn
New Member
I have a 6month old daughter and can`t imagine anything worse than having another child!
Posts: 20
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Post by Syn on Oct 10, 2007 8:44:41 GMT
and to top it off he called me mentally ill!
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Post by winegirl on Oct 10, 2007 11:52:15 GMT
Oh Syn, I dont know what to say! I think you are incredibly strong willed to throw him out with no more chances. You really are very strong! Has he had any further explanation for any of this? What will happen once you have sold the house? Have you thought about it yet?
This seems like all such terrible timimg for you having a new born and pni - I hope this experience makes you a stronger person x
I am not really sure what i can say to help, other than to offer my support and let you know i will always be around if you need to talk x
Sending you massive hugs (())
Winegirlx
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Post by monica on Oct 10, 2007 16:33:35 GMT
Hi
I'm so sorry for what you're going thru - it's the last thing you need with PNI. Woudl it be worth your while talking to him again about it? He's defo in the wrong but maybe getting him to put his cards on the table and explaning exactly and honestly why he's been texting this girl and the stuff in the texts etc. Could things be patched up? Splittin gup with someone is always awful but with a new baby and PNI to contend with makes it doubly difficult. You mentioned he'd done this sort of thing before? Was that recently?
Here for you if you need to talk
Monica
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Syn
New Member
I have a 6month old daughter and can`t imagine anything worse than having another child!
Posts: 20
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Post by Syn on Oct 11, 2007 7:33:18 GMT
Decided to try and work things out, doubt it will work but i don`t care if it doesn`t. He still thinks he hasn`t done anything wrong and he said if I had done it he wouldn`t of reacted like he would of been really angry but wouldn`t of split up and so on. Thats aload of s**t he would of thrown me out straight away. Theres only going to be a talking relationship and definatly not physical for a long time. I think another night on the sofa wont do any harm. Thanks for your support Syn xxxxxx
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Post by winegirl on Oct 11, 2007 8:09:35 GMT
Glad you have decided to try and work things out hun. I hope you guys can work through this and we will be here for you in the meanime hun x
Winegirl x
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