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Post by monica on Mar 30, 2012 20:53:04 GMT
Hi
Fantastic news that Meds are helping you feel better and that ur not being discharged!
So agree with everything Juposter has said. The psychologist sounds so kind and supportive. You are obviousy able to open up to her and honest? Well done.
I also don't think you want to die. I think life becomes uch a struggle it feels like a way outfrom suffering. I hoe this mood improvement really perks you up. It's so wonderful to hear you so positive.
Monica
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Post by Jay on Apr 4, 2012 17:51:38 GMT
Hi The Psychologist is now keeping on about my pill stash, she really wants me to get rid of them [which I can't do unless I replace them and I don't know what I would get instead]. She says that if I must keep them then I have to put them in the loft so that I still have them, but they are not easy to get to on impulse, I told her that I would think about it and also said that I understood what she was talking about. I know that I will not put them in the loft. I feel a bit like shit and I don't know why. Some how yesterday I went to work and drove into the car park I hit a wall the car scraped along the wall making an awful noise, then I drove on and mounted a kerb so I hit the wall again further along the car park, then I turned into a space [which was a short space and I caught the underneath of the front bumper on a high kerb....What the hell happened to me, I could not even cry. I felt a mess all day, I messed up at work on and off all day, I got what I call my fidgets where I sort of itch and can't stay still so I had to take diazepam just so I could sit still at the computer, by the time I got home I felt so awful so I had to have a couple of glasses of wine and I went and laid on the bed as I could not cope anymore, OH came and held me. Today I started thinking again 'what am I going to do' over and over I hope that it does not get so it is there all the time day and night and on loud speaker driving me nuts. Last night I could not bear to be in bed again. What do you think of this.. it sounds so wrong and so terrifying, he must be mad to want to do this. A friend of our family has depression, he is a plumber so we only see him now when we need a boiler repair etc. He came on Monday to do a repair and service. Well he has decided that he does not want to feel as awful and depressed in 5 yrs time, he had the electric shock treatment again last year, and is on lots of meds. He said that he either wants a cure before then or he wants out. He has booked to go to Holland to see a lady there who does a treatment which is unlicensed and illegal, so much so that she has had to change her email and bank accounts etc,to switzaland to avoid being caught. It is a tribal hallucigenic drug used in Africa and she has experience of using it, it is a one off dose then you are there for 3 days while you hallucinate and it somehow resets your brain. She has not had many fatalities??!!! He knows 2 people who have had it done, one it mended him, the other had it , they were ok during the treatment, but they walked out and he walked infront of a bus. He said to me 'there it worked it was only afterwards that he died so it is ok to have it' It has worried me lots and I keep thinking about this and how stupid he is. I am off work next week I booked it as I thought my daughter would be home, but she is going back to Uni at the weekend so I am worried about being alone next week, so I may write here if I get in trouble. Thank you everyone, enjoy your Easter. Lynne xx
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Post by monica on Apr 4, 2012 21:09:27 GMT
Hey Lynne
Firstly this treatment your friend is considering sounds very dangerous. As debilitating as the depression can be and the temptation to try miracle cures, it's all too risky.
Sounds like ur day in the car wasn't a good one that's why you felt rubbish after. But do remember 'normal' people ( and I use the term loosely ) have days when everything seems to go wrong too. If u ave these respective thoughts could you read a book or listen to an audio one. Would that distract you?
Happy Easter to you, Hun. Will be looking for you weekx
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Post by monica on Apr 20, 2012 8:37:18 GMT
How you doing Jay?x
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