butterfly
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Post by butterfly on Aug 27, 2010 6:53:40 GMT
Hi girls Monica you r so right a rollercoaster is just what I'm on!
Fsg, I know what you mean about not having motivation, try to remeber the good days will come and on those days you might suprise yourself like I did today.
My HV suggested me and my hubby do something together without the kids I am really goinbg to try and thunk trouble is my parents are on holiday, and I haent got anyone else to ask to babysit.
Also trying to think of stuff I could do on my own, but am a bit blank when I think.
take care my friends xx
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Post by Victoria on Aug 27, 2010 8:10:52 GMT
Morning butterfly, I am managing to keep hold of the hope that the good days will come thanks to all you girls on here. I hope you have another good day today. Spending time alone with hubby sounds a great idea, I dont have anyone to take all the kids at the same time though as 2 are hard work for anyone, so same problem as you. The good thing is that they all go to bed well and so from half 8 we are in adult time and relish the peace. It is hard thinking of stuff to do on your own, I am gonna try reading for half an hour but have yet to try it. Also the dog walking was supposed to be for me time but so far I havnt escaped my8yr old lol. Maybe you could go for a back massage or something for half an hour, my mum has been having them every 2 weeks and swears by them for stress so maybe they would help? I am seriously considering them myself. Have a good day hun. xxx
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Post by Weeble on Aug 27, 2010 18:41:48 GMT
Hi Butterfly - you HV is so right, it is so important to find adult time. But you dont have to go out, hire a good DVD, cook a special supper and sit down and eat it together before you watch the film.
Kat
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Post by Victoria on Aug 27, 2010 19:19:42 GMT
You have just described my social life Kat, that is what we do, kids go to bed at a decent time and then we chill out, get a take away and watch a dvd. We try and do that once every couple of weeks but I think we should do it once a week, set a certain night for "us" time. Hope you have had a good day hun. Have you thought of anything else you could do for some "me" time? xxx
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Post by juppster on Aug 27, 2010 19:38:14 GMT
Hi butterfly I am such a HUGE fan of having some "us" time or "me" time. Even if once our little man has gone to bed, we just stick some music on and have a snuggle on the sofa, it makes us feel so much closer again. I hope you manage to find some time to do some things for you and to get some alone time with your OH. Hoping your weekend is a good one xx
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butterfly
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Post by butterfly on Aug 27, 2010 19:52:42 GMT
thanks girls - well tomorrow i am hoping to see my friend with no kids in the morning!
I am going to suggest that we get our son in bed and have our meal later maybe a yummy takeaway and watch a DVD and then play on our wii fit and have a good laugh with each other!
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Post by monica on Aug 27, 2010 20:43:33 GMT
Sounds like a fab plan! Enjoy!
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Post by Victoria on Aug 28, 2010 7:54:45 GMT
Having a laugh is great, and makes you feel better instantly. Did you manage to have your evening? xxx
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Post by Weeble on Aug 28, 2010 21:16:21 GMT
How did it go, we did the same last night - OH very happy.
what have you got planned for the rest of the weekend
Kat
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butterfly
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Post by butterfly on Aug 28, 2010 22:23:37 GMT
Hi girls Today overall has been good. Really nice but scary in a way was apart from my baby for 4 hours! I had agood chat with my friendd but quite emotional and I still although feel ggood today can tell my mind is still completly messed up. Sometimes I can't believe the crazzy things I think. Felt confident with my baby today which was good. Spent some time with OH sister and family. Had a laugh and a meal out. Played a bit of the wii when the kids finally wwent to bed. Tomorrow we might go for a wonder around some booties!! I love a bargin! And the ironing pile has grown into a mountain so I'll have to do that. Not doing anything else. It felt great to go ffor a nice drive to my friends and play loud music but even when I felt relaxed and happy my mind drifted into remembering stuff about my babies illness. My friend thinks that I find it hard to believe its finally over and that she's actually well - she's right. For weeks after she was discharged I hid a suitcase full of our clothes under her bed because I was convinced shed be admitted again suddenly. If I am honest, I'd feel more comfortable if the suitcase was still there. I don't kno what the cousellor would make of that. Hope tomorrow is good. Thanks for all your messages x
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Post by Victoria on Aug 29, 2010 11:09:04 GMT
Hi butterfly, how are you today? I can understand about wantin that suitcase ready, kinda like a security blanket, and I cant see that it would be a bad thing if it gives you some peace of mind although I see what you mean, what the counsellor would say I dont know. It sounds like you need time to accept that your baby is now well and the nightmare is over but that is easier said than done and it can only be in your own time. Thinking of you. xxx
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Post by Weeble on Aug 29, 2010 20:54:20 GMT
I am not a psychologist, and I am sure they will say something different, but what is wrong with keeping the security blanket of a suitcase ready, if it makes you feel better, perhaps you can treat it like your memory box and slowly move it away from her or unpack it as you feel better, instead of going cold turkey. You seem to have a really similar sort of PNI to me and I have this sort of behaviour too, i need to feel safe, and it can be things like having a bag packed. My counsellor is a psychologist and her core advice is always I know myself better than anyone so if I need to do things like your suitcase I should do them.
When is your next session with the counsellor?? How did today go, how our your kids and OH?
Kat
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butterfly
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Post by butterfly on Aug 29, 2010 22:25:24 GMT
Hi everyone Today was ok, there were a few hard moments with my 2 year old. We survived. Tomorrow a friend with his toddler is popping over. We had a nic roast dinner. Baked some cakes and my son helped decorate! Shocked to hear my friends aunt commited suicide. Used to work with her. She had been suffering depression for years. Makes me more determined to get better. Hope tomorrows good. Meet with my counsellor wednesday. The suitcase thing, I think I don't need it now. Very tired tonight night x
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butterfly
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Post by butterfly on Aug 30, 2010 18:41:52 GMT
today has been good took the kids to a miniture railway, picnic and long walk. had a call from my nan and she cant come to my babies christening because of sort of health problems, am disapointed because really wanted her there. I think my mum will be upset to. I need to write more when i get time.
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Post by Victoria on Aug 30, 2010 19:20:27 GMT
glad you have had a good day, picnic sounds good. Thats sad that your nan cant be at the christening you will have to take lots of pics for her. Hope you are ok this evening. xxx
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