ec
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Post by ec on Nov 17, 2020 10:50:12 GMT
Thanks for the advice. I’ve tried some of the non judgemental awareness of thoughts that I was part of the cbt. When I’m having a physical sensation I do find it hard though. The physical symptoms always seem to start first and then the anxiety about them follows. Last week or so the off balance, heavy head feeling has improved lots so it’s nice to have some respite from it. However have had some tingling recently in hands which has shown up again this morning and is making me think the worst. I’ve pulled a muscle in my back in right side so can explain the right hand but not the left. I know I take one symptom and then massively catastrophise. I’ve read a lot of other peoples posts on physical symptoms and they talk about tingles and I remember I had them with previous pni. Went to doctor and they effectively told me to go away. Generally I feel like I’m ok until I get physical symptoms and then I start obsessing. So then I feel confused as I’m like what if it’s not pni? But then I know I’ve been here before thinking everything would be great if only I didn’t have physical symptoms. It’s like your mind can’t see the bigger picture that your only obsessing because you have the anxiety. It’s so confusing! I have been trying to see people and I do find it helps. My baby has started sleeping really badly and sometimes it’s hard to stick to arrangements with breastfeeding and dropping the others off. I hope you continue to stay well x
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Post by monica on Nov 17, 2020 22:36:49 GMT
Hi EC
Everything you feel is so familiar ...thinking of only I didn’t have the psychical symptoms I’d be ok, what if it’s not Pni etc . That familiar pattern of physical symptoms, anxiety (or after taking meds depression for me). For me it was this unpleasant rollercoaster ride ....
I would do what you can to alleviate the catastrophisation (if that’s a word?) and anxiety - ride it out - it will pass. You’ve got through it before and you will again!
How’s your baby doing? How old is she now?
All good at my end - everything’s a bit dull tbh X
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ec
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Post by ec on Nov 20, 2020 21:20:24 GMT
My baby is nearly 5 months. She’s gorgeous and a real giggler but her wind has got worse again and she seems to be in some discomfort after feeding. I seem to have an itchy scalp as a new symptom or could be change in hormones? Whenever I breastfeed I get an itchy jaw and never thought much of it but the itchy head is getting the old anxiety twitching again. Did you ever get any itches? I remember when my pni was awful before I got an itchy nose at night. Didn’t make me feel anxious but was an annoyance. Just feel like my mind is jumping on anything at the moment. X
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Post by monica on Nov 21, 2020 21:30:57 GMT
Hi EC
Your baby sounds adorable . Poor little one suffering with the wind. What’s that from? Is she on solids yet? My youngest had dreadful colic - I took him to a cranial osteopath - it helped hugely though I found every so often I’d have to take him to top up sessions as things like colds, vaccinations etc could set him off.
I’m sorry the itchiness is bothering you - it’s probably nothing but could you get advice ? I don’t remember this but believe me I had many other niggles! If the real issue is the anxiety maybe see if the cbt with therapist would be an option ? Just something to get you back on track . Everyone has wobbles (I certainly do) and it sounds like the cbt worked well last time . Hang on in there x
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ec
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Post by ec on Dec 12, 2020 19:26:55 GMT
Hi Monica How are you? I’ve had a few much better weeks with some anxiety but not too bad. Although I will still have a sensation and then my mind is straight back to catastrophising. Had a few tingly sensations in my knee and it’s like my whole mood can change to anxiety in the space of a split second. It’s like my brain is hardwired to notice anything different and then I’m immediately thinking the worst. I try and come back from it, sometimes more successfully than at other times. Sometimes I have this feeling that everything is generally ok that life is sure to throw me something bad. I try and enjoy the good times but when I’m feeling anxious I think something bad is sure to happen. Other times when I’m not feeling anxious I don’t feel this so I know it’s anxiety. Did you ever get this? Maybe it’s a product of pni with my other two children that I always feel so worried about saying things are ok like I’m going to jinx myself and the odd tingles won’t be a strange body symptom but a neurological disease. X
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Post by monica on Dec 14, 2020 22:17:44 GMT
Hi EC
Great to hear the last few weeks have been good! That really is positive and even though the health anxiety may pop up if it were to be illustrated with j a graph the line would overall be heading upwards!
I too found that my thought patterns were so ingrained that any slight trigger, even subconscious , would set the thoughts off. The fact that sometimes you can bat them away is really good. It might take time to do this Everytime but don’t despair - it’s all looking positive. Maybe going back to the cbt with a practitioner would help ?
Are you ready for Christmas? How do you feel about it all! I’m real bah humbug ...but the present shopping is nearly done! Hooray! X
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Post by monica on Dec 14, 2020 22:18:46 GMT
Yes I did have this worry about jinxing any positive thoughts do would have a tendency to be rather negative . Hang on in there! You’re doing great x
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ec
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Post by ec on Dec 29, 2020 13:35:41 GMT
Hi Monica Happy Christmas! I hope you had a good one (as much as one could this time of year) I had a lovely Christmas Day. Pretty much free from anxiety. However it’s been creeping back in the last few days. Been getting slight twinges in my back recently, like when you’ve been sat on a chair with a spoke sticking into the back. It’s not painful as such it just feels like a ripple sensation in the skin. My mind has jumped on it though and then the moment I feel it I can feel the anxiety. Trying to remember I’ve been here with so many different sensations which have come and gone. Just needed to get it off my chest, I know you have heard the same story from me many times before xx
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Post by monica on Dec 29, 2020 19:15:16 GMT
Hi EC
So very pleased you’ve had such a great anxiety free Xmas! This is your space to say whatever you like and even if you have said it before! You can repeat whatever you need to a thousand times if you like!
The back issue sounds like some sort of back spasm? I get this in ive particular muscle. Don’t forget you’re having to puck up out down your baby multiple times a day! My back was absolutely screwed after each child! But I’m guessing it’s less about the actual in itself and more that it triggers the anxiety. Keep trying those cbt techniques and even if this is a little blip you’ve done so well especially to get through Xmas. I thought I was going to have some sort of breakdown!! Too much!! X
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Post by monica on Jan 15, 2021 10:21:08 GMT
Hi EC
Happy New Year!! How are you doing? Hope you’re well during these timesx
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ec
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Post by ec on Jan 20, 2021 16:46:55 GMT
Hi Monica I’m ok thanks, some weeks feel better than others. I always try and appreciate when anxiety is reduced and I’ve just had a couple of good weeks. I’m noticing a definite pattern, 2-3 good weeks then a harder week with some sort of physical symptom. This week it’s aches and pains and feeling really tired. To be fair my baby has been sleeping really badly and my other children have been up in the night also. Other times though, when I had bad nights, don’t feel too bad physically so I think I’m in a bit of a blip. Got head/skull pain and pain in shoulders and pains shooting down my arms. I’ve had all these before so I pretty sure it’s post natal. When I have a blip I definitely worry about COVID more and freak out that I’ll get long COVID. My children are at school and me and my other half are key workers so could easily catch it. Argh, a pandemic is not great at all for people with health anxiety! (not good for anyone, I’m being self indulgent) I’m just so worried about suffering long term symptoms like I did with pni. At least with my blips they tend to last a week and then there’s rest bite and I know what it is. How are you? I hope you are not going stir crazy in lock down. X
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Post by monica on Jan 22, 2021 18:00:03 GMT
Hi
Glad things are generally ok with you. It’s actually positive you see a pattern - I wonder, do you think it coincides with your period (not sure if you’ve had one if you’re Bf).
I think covid has triggered health anxiety in many and probably worsened in in those who struggled with it previously. I’m sure even if you get it you’ll be ok - most people are . I had it in oct - one day of temperature and cough which wasn’t too bad. One son had headache for 2 days which lifted with calpol - the other lost taste and snell and felt a little ropey for two days. My eldest son had it in March and his only symptom was loss of taste/smell.
Poor little kiddywinkles and poor you if you’re being kept up at night. Tiredness always was a trigger for symptoms for me. Hope they settle quickly x
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Post by monica on Jan 22, 2021 18:03:28 GMT
I’m managing ok with lockdown this time. I’ve been watching game of thrones obsessively. I’m quite surprised I like it!!
Tbh I’ve had serious issues again with my middle son - think he has ASD and when he has nothing to like college he becomes listless with lack of motivation and there’s nothing I can do to as hes v stubborn and won’t try. Plus he went to a little gathering after I’d said no - he sneaked out after I went to bed. It really freaked me out! X
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ec
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Post by ec on Feb 4, 2021 20:28:23 GMT
Hi Monica Thanks fot the reply. I’m still breastfeeding so no period. Not sure what brings on the symptoms, maybe stress. I’ve definitely had more of the pni symptoms this week but think it’s because I’m going back to work, only for a day in a couple of weeks and just the usual niggles of returning from mat leave coupled with uncertainty over the virus. I am looking forward to being back but when I feel symptoms like heavy head etc I think how will I be able to do my job, however I managed last time when I returned after pni. I’m sorry to hear you’ve had a bit of a tricky time with your son. It must be so hard to parent a teenager at the mo. Hopefully schools will open soon and some level of normality will return. I’m sure your doing a great job x
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Post by monica on Feb 6, 2021 21:10:09 GMT
Hi EC
How do you feel about your return to work? I’m sure it’ll be fine. It might be a bit hard initially but once you get back into the routine it’ll be fine amd maybe give you a bit of a breather!
I hope the symptoms subside - I found that once I went back to work I was so distracted I didn’t think about the symptoms which for me was the best distraction. I hope it’s the same for you!
Thx for your comments about my son. I’m frantically trying to get him back to college as the routine will help himx
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