|
Post by monica on Jun 10, 2006 18:42:10 GMT
Hi
That happended with both my kids and several times. Don't blame yourself. They are so quick. It' all happens in the blink of the eye. You got her checked out. Honestly it happens to everyone.
how aer you? Prob the stress of it has made you a bit wobbly tonight but I'm sure it'll pass.
Love
Monica
|
|
|
Post by cheshire on Jun 10, 2006 19:28:05 GMT
Hi Gail
Are you feeling any better?
Love 'n hugs Hopefulxx
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jun 12, 2006 11:43:34 GMT
i feel a bit low today - emotional. i think its because i had too much wine the other night, tiredness and perhaps hormones (!). me and d arent too good at the moment. we seem to ne arguing constantly -like were eachothers worst enemy and i feel as though weve lost what we had - we were so in love before pni and now i feel as though weve lost eachother and cant get it back. we dont talk any more -we just bicker. he doesnt show me any affection like he used to. we havent had sex since tlws was born (not that i want to but thats not the point -im the one whose ill not him). he hardly ever touches me. its like we have a business arrangement and its so upsetting.
are we dooomed becasue of pni? i couldnt bear it if this is it, forever losing what we had and never getting it back. i dont even know where to begin to try.
any advice, please becasue i dont ant to lose him
gail xxxxxxx
|
|
|
Post by yoyo on Jun 12, 2006 15:10:43 GMT
PNI really does push relatinoships to their limits, I know it has ours - but once we sat and talked about it, really talked about it things were much easier and the more I leet hubby in on it the more he began to understand. Not sure if that is the way to go for you and d but might be worth a try?
PNI will fade as will the mood swings/irrational thinking/anxiety/and the emotions will return. It's important you can both believe this, sometimes it's all that gets you through a rough patch x x x
Tell him how much you love him and appreciate him, even if you're not sure you're connecting with the feelings. Let him know it's your illness talking and not you x x Pni puts strain on both of you x x
Thinking of you x
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jun 12, 2006 17:29:11 GMT
thanks yoyo.
you hit the nail on the head when you mentioned 'connecting with the feelings' thats how it is. i cant connect with the feelings i should have and used to have.
it doesnt feel as though well ever get it back. also im getting hot sweaty flushes at the mo -i think this is my time of the month.
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jun 15, 2006 18:17:04 GMT
feeling good today - cant leave tlws alone! i keep sweeping her up in my arms and hugging and kissing her (not that i didnt before -its just feels right now) the feelings are there again and im connecting with them.
me and d had a chat last night about how i was feeling (ie, about me feeling scared we've lost eachother's love etc) as i had a very low hour where i felt all weird and scared again. he reassured me and said that he still feels exactly the same about me so i suppose its just me. its very difficult but im sure we can work on it.
felt better after telling him how i felt.
i think that ive identified that my triggers for down days mainly revolve around tlws. ive had a bad few days since her fall last week, but feel better now. im going to try to think of the triggers so i can better prepare myself/
love gailxxxx
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jun 20, 2006 18:13:45 GMT
i have just come through a little blip which has lasted about 2 weeks.
today i feel good, i was really at ease in mother and baby group and felt comfortable in my own skin.
did have the sweats and the shakes afterwards though, but just needed something to eat i think. feel fine - even getting some feelings back towards d!
i hope i continue to get better and dont go downhill. i am prepared for that if it does happen....i think.
love gailxx
|
|
|
Post by cheshire on Jun 20, 2006 21:41:24 GMT
Hi Gail
I sure do know what you mean about blips- glad you're through yours, me too, thankfully.
I've been keeping up with your posts - you're doing amazingly well:)
When does your course start?
Love Hopefulxxx
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jun 30, 2006 13:40:12 GMT
hi i feel i have to mention something ive noticed has happened to me during pni/ my recovery. it dawned on me whilst i was talking to my cpn the other day. lets see, how can i explain this. we were chatting and i mentioned id had a few 'down' days and she said that she felt that id been having more down days than up days this month. however; i thought about this for a while and disagreed. i think its because im ACCEPTING my down days now, and am not in denial - forcing good days and lying between my teeth saying im fine when in fact im crying on the inside. putting on a brave face. so i think that now, although it may seem like im having more 'down days', in fact, i feel as though i have moved on with my recovery and have finally learned to cope with the downers. they dont scare me anymore like they used to - and i must still get the thoughts, but they just wash over me (most of the time).so i admit that these days are downers instead of kidding myself that 'im fine'. i think i can cope now apart from - when i havent eaten for a few hours (get a rush of old symptoms) when i am stressed (even slightly) for example: changing a nappy (!), changing or bathing tlws, getting ready to go out etc i find all these things stressful when something happens to tlws eg. if she has a bump. - i get awful thought and think that i did it or wanted it to happen awful. my cpn said this was good as my 'down' days are normal 'fed up days' and not necessarily acutely ill days where i would need company/ help/support. she even said she aims to discharge me by the time i begin uni in september! great news!!!! hope every one is having a good day gailxx
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jun 30, 2006 13:41:00 GMT
p.s
me and D are even having a bit of 'nookie' lol and feel more lovey dovey!!!
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jul 11, 2006 10:42:55 GMT
so forgetful today - got up at 9, went downstairs and while i was on the loo i thought 'damn, i forgot to pu the computer on' but 2 seconds later i heard it come on - i have no memory of doing it! freaked me out a bit
then i was upstairs ironing tlws' clothes, she woke up, i changed her bum, then came downstairs and forgot to switch the iron off. not like me at all.
ive been getting all stressed out as today is mother and baby group and i cant find anything nice for tlws to wear. i feel as though i have to dress her up - there was this one particular dress i thought she should wear but i cant find it anywhere and got all panicky and stressed lokking for it - i havent got anything nice to wear either. im sat in damp jeans because theyre my best ones and i havent got time for them to dry. god im so stressed and it isnt even noon yet.
tlws has to lok immaculate and me or we dont go -sad isnt it, and selfish. last week we didnt go because it was too hot and i didnt want to loook all sweaty when i got there. i try to find any excuse to avoid it as i feel judged and scrutinised when i am there. i know its probably all in my head but i think theyre all judging me and comparing me to their own babies and if i think tlws doesnt look the best/ wont look the best i dont go. theres this one mother who goes and her little girl is always in such beautiful dresses and the mother seems to have everything in order - even muslin cloths to put on her clothes to protect them ?! i wouldnt even think of that. she seems so together.
when i arrive, im always flustered, dripping with sweat from my brow, flushed and stressed. never cool, calm and collected.
i try to make myself go though because somehow i feel better talking to other mothers. though i dont think any of them have been through what weve been through -i havent told any of them either so they probably think im weird/odd or something. i tried telling one of the midwives the other week about my hot flushes and she mentioned some other women who were like that but then whispered to me as if it was some dirty secret that 'they went on to have all them things with the hormones' so i probably wont say anything.
id be so curious to know if any of them had/ are having problems. i feel so alone with this as ive never met anyone who's had it.
anyway- moan over with
hope everyone's ok.
gailxxxxxxxxx
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jul 12, 2006 13:05:26 GMT
feeeeeeeeeeeeling greaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttt!!!!! like normal!!!
today is the best ive felt since like, ever!!! i cant remember!!! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
|
|
|
Post by yoyo on Jul 12, 2006 15:28:16 GMT
Well done you Enjoy yourself
|
|
|
Post by cheshire on Jul 12, 2006 15:42:04 GMT
|
|
gail
Senior Member
have 1 daughter and have had this since 30 weeks of pregnancy :( my daughter is 27 months.
Posts: 373
|
Post by gail on Jul 19, 2006 18:29:59 GMT
emotional at the moment. listening to some lovely music and it has opened up the floodgates it seems....
|
|