michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Aug 22, 2008 17:38:36 GMT
Ended up having to ring cpn as not heard from her by dinner time and wanted to talk to her. She wasnt much help. She just talked to me on the phone and i couldnt tell her how i was feeling and couldnt explain myself properly so feel like i have sort of messed up by not being so honest with her. I did try to tell her how i was feeling but she didnt seem to be listening to me. Seeing her tues morning and hope i can get further forward then.Maybe being face to face might be easier to get my feelings across instead of some rushed telephone conversation. I got more help from the duty cpn yesterday and he doesnt even know my situation.
Saw jack this afternoon and went to soft play then back to my house to play with his toys so went well. Phil being very fumny with me. Sent me a nasty text earlier and was very offish with me today. I hate it having to be him that supervises it - but then i suppose it would prob be worse if it was a stranger.
Shell
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Post by bam02 on Aug 22, 2008 20:16:42 GMT
Its Friday night not the easiest of nights....
R U Better tonite?
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Aug 22, 2008 20:53:21 GMT
ive had a relax in the bath (without getting arms wet so wasnt too good) and now having few glasses of wine and got some friends on msn to talk to and some abba music and my helpline numbers to hand. I still have the urge so much but i cant go back to a & e for the third night. I need to learn not to hurt myself.
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Post by bam02 on Aug 22, 2008 20:58:37 GMT
Gr8 you relax luv
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Post by winegirl on Aug 23, 2008 7:33:36 GMT
Hi Hun
Sorry wasnt around last night. You seemed to have down well? A bath and abba ounds like a great idea to me...
Hows things today, you got much planned? Glad it went ok with Jack, will you be seeing him again soon?
WG xx
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Post by bean on Aug 23, 2008 7:59:22 GMT
Morning Shell Quickest way to reply at mo - you look great - like I say system would crash with my mug on it. Feeling quite fragile but will try and get on later. Thinking of you - take care of yourself. T Bean x
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Aug 24, 2008 18:59:38 GMT
had few too many drinls last night when went out for family meal amnd got home and cut - but not too bad. Now ive juts bought 2 bottles of wine and slowly trying to get drunk tonight. Just to feel better. Had such a long lonely day today and got the same tomorrow. Noone to see and nowhere to go - plus i couldnt even be bothered to get dressed today except when i went for the wine.
Shell
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Post by winegirl on Aug 24, 2008 19:10:10 GMT
Hi Shell
I am the same tomorrow, noone to see and nowhere to go. Gets me a bit down thinking about it too! I will try to use the day constructively to get some stuff done if I can though.
You got any more time planned at the charity shop??
WG x
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Aug 24, 2008 19:41:03 GMT
oh god - the charity shop. I havent been since middle of july.
At least you have your daughter to tend to and keep you company. I hate being on my own but at moment am hating being around others too. No happy medium for me.
Shell
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Post by bean on Aug 24, 2008 19:52:53 GMT
Hi Shell Hope youre managing tonight - dont get too pissed, Ive been doing bit too much of that lately too. Im thinking of you. Take care hun Love bean x
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Post by winegirl on Aug 24, 2008 19:53:44 GMT
Know what you mean. When people are there you want them to go, but when you are on your own you want someone to come round! Glad its not just me x
You think you might go back to the charity shop??
WG x
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Aug 24, 2008 20:04:25 GMT
i say i will go back to charity shop but then i get bad and cant manage it. Maybe im just not ready for it. Im pleased you can relate to the not wanting to be with people but not wanting to be alone thingy.
Nice to hear from you bean - i want to be drunk to stop feeling all this pain tonight, and maybe i might get too drunk i cant s/h. Ive been thinking of you too and wish i could make it better for you. At least you got martha. Always remember that.
Shell
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Post by winegirl on Aug 25, 2008 7:35:06 GMT
Hi Shell
Did you make it through the night ok last night? Im sorry I disappeared, fell asleep with my laptop LOL!
Hope you are ok this morning and will be thinking of you as we are both doing nothing today!
Take Care
WG x
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Post by bean on Aug 26, 2008 20:33:07 GMT
Hi Shell I hope youre ok, I know Im lucky to have Martha - youve seen her shes the light in my life, why cant I remembe that more. You are doing ok you know, you might not realist it but you are. I know im an ed the ball looonie but i can see that you fight this so well. Anyway Ill try to get back later - might need you darl. Luv bean x..
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Post by cazfletcher on Aug 26, 2008 21:39:44 GMT
hi shell, how are you doing tonight? x
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