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Post by littlelotty on Nov 11, 2008 23:21:06 GMT
hun please dont, think of all that you have achieved over the past four weeks - you are doing so well and this is just a little blip - i get them and they do past - things will seem clearer in the morning you just need to get some sleep. What helps to get you to sleep?? Try and use distraction - do something - even if like me it is cleaning anything other than cutting.
please take care hun
littlelotty
xx
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Nov 11, 2008 23:23:45 GMT
i deserve to cut because I am such a bad person ad i have messed up jacks life. I feel so upset and cant change things and dontknow what to do. Im confused and frustrated and so angry and hate myself so much. I cant see any other way. i know i have doen 4 weeks but cant go on with that
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Post by littlelotty on Nov 11, 2008 23:30:34 GMT
Yes you can go on without cutting and you will. You are so NOT a bad person and you have NOT messed jacks life up. You have been ill hun and you are on the road to getting better. You will have some great times ahead with him and try and keep this in mind. You are such a fantastic person and have so much inner strength and you have been such an inspiriation to me when i have felt so low recently and just reading your diary has picked me up. You are an amazing person and never forget that.
You will change things hun - you need to find other ways to manage your anger and hurt and cutting is not the answer, i know it might seem like that now but it isnt trust me hun. Is there anything that helps to do in order to not cut? Can you phone the crisis line at the mental health team?
Hang in there babes you will get through this
littlelotty
xx
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Post by winegirl on Nov 12, 2008 8:34:06 GMT
Hi Shell
Sorry crashes out last night. You ok this morning? I really really hope you managed to get through the night without cutting??
Let us know how you are when you get 5 mins??
Thinking of you x
WG xx
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Nov 12, 2008 8:41:44 GMT
Hi
Im sorry for last night - was in a state over Jack and was struggling to deal with it. But I never cut!!!! Thank god. I really need to stop drinking wine on a night as it is making me want to do bad things. But at least I never gave in.
Shell
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Post by winegirl on Nov 12, 2008 9:53:08 GMT
Me too - lets stop drinking together!!
Well done on last night - you are AMAZING!!!!
WG x
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Nov 12, 2008 18:20:39 GMT
Thank You - but I still dont think I am amazing yet! But it is nice that I am giving some imspiration to others but I still dont feel like I have done anything good.
Shell xxx
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Post by winegirl on Nov 12, 2008 18:28:30 GMT
Oh you have!! I think you are awesome! You really have no ides how much hope and courage you are giving the other ladies on here. Stick with it girl... A month tomorrow is it??
WG x
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Nov 12, 2008 18:33:14 GMT
Yep - a month tomorrw. Think I might go to town and buy myself something as a treat. Clintons selling eeyore stuff half price and as I love Winne The Pooh especially eeyore then that be fab!!!
Shell xxx
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Post by winegirl on Nov 12, 2008 18:49:25 GMT
Get yourself down there mate!! Wish I had time to get myself down to Clintons myself as always fancied an eeyore mug... x
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Post by littlelotty on Nov 12, 2008 20:39:32 GMT
Shell
There is no words to say how well you are doing, i am so so so so so pleased you didnt cut last night, i knew that once you slept you would feel better this morning. I agree with you about buying you a treat - you need things to treat and feel like you have achieved something!
You are just amazing and you are my inspiration!
take care
littlelotty
xx
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Post by bean on Nov 12, 2008 21:00:04 GMT
Well done Shell you're a complete STAR!!!!!!!!!!!
Love and strength bean x
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Nov 13, 2008 20:26:42 GMT
woohoo - just have to day it
ONE WHOLE MONTH TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Post by cheshire on Nov 13, 2008 20:28:44 GMT
You are amazing Shell  Loads of love Hx |
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Post by motherferret on Nov 14, 2008 15:27:41 GMT
Shell, you are fabulous!!! Get yourself down to Clintons and get everything with eeyore on it that you can!!! Hitting a whole month is a major thing. In AA they say to "keep it in the day" and "One day at a time". One hour at a time, if needs be. Whatever it takes. They have a card you can carry with you that has several sayings on it - the one that helps me the most is "I can do for twelve hours what would appal me if I thought I had to do it for a lifetime". That keeps me from drinking an awful lot. For some reason, the nights before a new target are the worst. I mark the weeks on a Saturday, so tonight will be hard because its a new week tomorrow. I dont know why that is, but it happens. The night before the month sober was dreadful!!!! I wish I could have wine - but all it does is make me cry too, and I seem to have no sense of how to copntrol how much I drink. But one day at a time. Today I have not had a drink, therefore whatever else goes on today then it is a good day. Today you have not hurt yourself, so whatever else happens, today is still a good day.
Get that Eeyore mug and give yourself a huge well-done hug from me.
Love,
Ali xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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