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Post by bean on Sept 16, 2008 19:30:21 GMT
Hi Shell
Im so sorry you're feeling this bad I wish there was a magic cure I really do. You deserve so much more and deserve to be well and happy, please ring someone tonight I want you to be safe. I dont really know what else to say apart from to send you massive hugs and lovexx
beanxxx
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Post by winegirl on Sept 16, 2008 20:46:27 GMT
No you dont hun.
I know what you mean about the meds numbing you. I have often felt like I wanted to burst into tears but couldnt, and i think that can be worse than just letting it all out sometimes.
Of course you will be better - you just need to keep fighting for the help that you need. And nce you are better, regardless of your self harm history, you will be entightled to shard custody of your son. It wont happen overnight, but if you keep screaming for help at these people and getting yourself better too, then it really is in front of you.
Here on and off if you need to chat tonight babes xx
WG x
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Sept 16, 2008 21:53:53 GMT
 self harmed tonight - although not deep but more a frenzied attack on the tops of my arms. Really needed to feel some pain and felt nothing Dont know how i feel now |
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Sept 18, 2008 19:34:51 GMT
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Post by monica on Sept 20, 2008 6:25:06 GMT
Oh sweetheart - wish I could give you a huge hug. How are you doing?
Of course you miss Jack - it must be awful not havng him around. Can you see him soon? What's wrong with you is that you're ill. Maybe try and tackle one issue at a time otherwise it's alot to contend with. I'm a real believer in wrting things down - inbalck and white it can stand out alot more as opposed to being this which jumble in your head which you can't make head nor tail of. Sorry can't remember , have yu seen your cpn at all?
Monica
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Post by winegirl on Sept 20, 2008 7:29:12 GMT
Hey Shell
Sorry havent been around. How are you doing today babes??
Have you tried ringing teh CPN again?
WG xx
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Sept 20, 2008 9:06:50 GMT
No i havent seen my cpn - i ended up pouring my heart to the support worker at the drop in centre instead. We talked for about half hour about so much. I seem to get more sense out of her than my cpn. Although i should really have rang my cpn and told her how i was feeling and about the self harm.
I also spent a lot of time talking about jack and whats happened with the psychologist on thursday. She asked me to fill out another two questionnaires. One was about dissociative behaviour (which isnt really me) and the other was about post traumatic stress disorder as she thinks i am suffering from this after what happened with jacks birth and what happened when i was abused and raped by a previous boyfriend. I sorta knew i had it after jacks birth but never thought about the other thing.
Yay i managed to get through yesterday without self harming!!! Hopefully today will be ok too. Going to meet a friend for coffee and then we going to the drop in centre and then tonight ive got a couple of friends coming round for few drinks. Yay more wine!!!
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Post by winegirl on Sept 20, 2008 9:20:00 GMT
Hi Shell
Well done on getting through yesterday mate! I hope you have a lovely time with your friends tonight babes - might have a glass of wine myself to toast you girls - lol x
Have a fab day!!
WG xx
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Post by winegirl on Sept 21, 2008 10:17:24 GMT
Morning Shell,
Hows the head? LOL x Hope you had a lovely time!
xx
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michelle79
Senior Member
mummy to Jack born 2004 and had pni since his birth
Posts: 471
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Post by michelle79 on Sept 22, 2008 18:37:33 GMT
once again another bad day. Have self harmed every day for past week and about to do it again tonight but trying not to. I feel like i shouldnt be stopping myself because i deserve to feel the pain and have another mark on my body. Im such an awful person and have such awful things going round my head. I hate everything |
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Post by winegirl on Sept 22, 2008 19:57:16 GMT
Hi Babes Get yourself to a&e and demand to see someone on the pysch ward. Tell them you have harmed all week and you are worried that it could get serious tonight if you are not helped immediately. These people need to take you seriously! I would hate you to end up back in there with another bad cut. You are so pretty and I hate to think of you doing that to your body Have you got anyone who would go to a&e with you to help stand up for you? I really think desperate cryies for help are in order now. WG xx |
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Post by bean on Sept 22, 2008 20:54:50 GMT
hi darl, sent you a pm
luv bean x
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Post by winegirl on Sept 23, 2008 0:07:24 GMT
How you doing Shell??
WGx
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Post by monica on Sept 23, 2008 8:46:51 GMT
Hi
How did you get on yesterday? How are you today?
Sending you a huge hug.
Monica
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Post by bean on Sept 23, 2008 9:33:49 GMT
Hi Shell
How you doing hun? Hope you're ok.
Luv & hugs bean x
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self harmed tonight - although not deep but more a frenzied attack on the tops of my arms. Really needed to feel some pain and felt nothing 